


Everything

by CrimeLady



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Crime Scenes, Crimes & Criminals, Death, Drama, Kidnapping, Kissing, Love, Romance, Second Chances, Sherlock Holmes - Freeform, Sherlock Holmes Has Feelings, Suspense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-10-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:20:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 39
Words: 49,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26662081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrimeLady/pseuds/CrimeLady
Summary: This is my continuation of my 1st part "A fatal rescue"It was two years ago that Katie met Sherlock and her life changed once and for all. Meanwhile she has left London and is in the process of building a new life, when an old acquaintance suddenly reappears...History is set between the 2nd and 3rd season (after Reichenbach)
Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 5





	1. New Life

**Author's Note:**

> Hello :) It's me again. This time with the continuation to my previous story „a fatal rescue“. I hope you like it and as always I'm happy about your comments ;)
> 
> And now I hope you enjoy reading!

**2 years later**

2 years have passed since then. 2 years after these terrible events took everything away from her. Suddenly she was alone and had no one. Well nobody is perhaps not quite right.  
By chance, she met John Watson and Sherlock Holmes. Sherlock had wanted to save her life back then, not knowing that this was all just a staged play for a criminal organisation that was blackmailing and threatening her brother.  
And so everything, more or less, took its course. After barely escaping a bullet, she went with Sherlock to 221B Baker Street. It was there that she met John Watson. She liked John from the start. Somehow he reminded her a little of her brother from her earlier years. He was very compassionate and caring with her from the beginning. A friendship quickly developed between them and even after they had lost sight of each other, they stayed in touch.  
And then there was Sherlock. For some reason, she didn't want to have anything to do with the detective at first and behaved dismissively and dismissively towards him. But one evening, suddenly everything changed. He had accompanied her to a nearby hotel the other night to make sure she was out of danger. The walk and their conversations increasingly changed their view of Sherlock and his person. John had always described him in his blog as the detective with the impressive deductive abilities who could solve one case after another completely rationally and without any feelings. But this man standing there in front of her was not as he was described. He was less pretentious and arrogant and worried?! From that moment on she saw him in a different light and noticed for the first time, these strange emerging feelings. Yes and then there was this kiss. This kiss that brought her world around her to collapse, totally unexpected but nevertheless extremely pleasant. The kiss that followed her in her dreams until today. She had realised then that she had feelings for this man and she was sure that he felt the same way.

But then a message suddenly changed everything. A message that forced her to give up her life as it was. And now 2 years later she is on the other side of the ocean, another continent, in her cute little 2-bedroom flat overlooking Lincoln Park in Chicago.

Sherlock thought at the time that his brother Mycroft could organise something for her. Some kind of witness protection programme. They also arranged for her to have a beautiful little flat and a new identity. Her name was no longer Katie Wilson. She was now called Jane Matthews.

It didn't take long for her to get used to her new life in Chicago. She spent the first few weeks getting to know the city, the immediate surroundings and the people. When her financial means slowly came to an end, she decided to look for a job.  
To begin with, she worked in a supermarket during the day and a bar near her flat at night. As it soon turned out, the usual visitors to the bar were police or FBI agents. She was always interested in their work and quickly got into conversation with them. A returning visitor was Jack Hunter. He was a young man, who in Katie's opinion was also quite handsome. He had short brown hair, was tall and always wore a well-cut suit that highlighted the contours of his athletically built body. He did not come from here either. His slight British accent told her that he must have been from Britain. He grew up in Liverpool and after a while he went to America. He had always wanted to work in the FBI. Where he eventually ended up. And now Jack works at the FBI in the field of behavioural research. One of their work is to better understand the psyche of a murderer by means of interviews and analysis by a criminal psychologist. She was immediately hooked on the idea and his work and spent most of the time just talking to him. They also began to meet outside of work. At some point in time he told her that they were looking for a new member for the Criminal Psychology Department. Katie was well qualified with her degree in forensic psychiatry, she knew that. But unfortunately both her degree and "Katie Wilson" were no longer available. Mycroft had somehow managed to erase her and her life completely from the system. Therefore she supports Jack every now and then with suggestions or food for thought. Over time, a friendship developed between them and she also got to know more of his colleagues through him.

She was sure that she would succeed in starting a new life here. Nevertheless she missed her friends from London. Molly, who quickly became a very good friend of hers, and John, with whom she could always laugh and who was always so worried about her, and the one who promised to bring her back as soon as possible when she left, and even Sherlock.  
Sherlock, who again and again robbed her every nerve. The one who trampled on her feelings and the one who made the evening before her departure unforgettable.

And now she stood here at her door in her Chicago flat and stared in horror at the person standing in front of her.


	2. Flashback 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, who's gonna be at her door? The resolution comes later ;)  
> Well, I was busy again and that's why there are a few more chapters later :)
> 
> And now have fun reading on ;)

FLASHBACK

_Neither of them thought of stopping, but a short clearing from the corner suddenly scared them apart._  
_"Oh, excuse me. I didn't mean to disturb you but I think you might both be interested," John said embarrassedly, holding his mobile phone in the air._

_"This.... That was just Lestrade," he stammered still embarrassed. "He said they were at the address Katie gave us and found three men of foreign descent at the address..... Dead. Shot in the head with velvet."_  
_"And....One of the men had a knife in his head. in the heart. And on this one, a note:_  
**" That was just the beginning, Mr. Holmes. You'll hear from me."**  
_"Moriarty?" Katie whispered to him._  
_"What did you just say?"_  
_"My brother said that the men were working for a man called Moriarty. He must have killed them," she finally explained._  
_Sherlock's face lit up more and more. "He's back!"_  
_Then he turned, grinning, to his friend, who looked back at him slightly annoyed and both at the same time:_  
_"The game is on!"_

_Katie frowned in confusion and did not understand what it all meant and who this Moriarty was. But apparently they both knew this Moriarty and Sherlock was visibly pleased with his appearance._  
  
_"But there is something else," John replied, glancing slightly furtively at Katie before turning his eyes towards Sherlock._

_He seemed to understand immediately and loosened his grip around Katie and took a step back._  
_"Excuse me, but we need to talk about something for a moment. Perhaps you'd like to have tea with Mrs Hudson while we talk," Sherlock replied, pushing her gently down the stairs and then into the kitchen, dragging John with him and locking the doors._

_Katie stood there, completely confused and staring at the point where he had just let her out. She sensed that there must be something going on with her, otherwise they wouldn't be acting so mysteriously. She pondered for a moment whether she should go in the direction where they disappeared or go downstairs to the nice older lady. However, as Katie was always very curious by nature, she quickly put the suggestion aside and turned back towards the front door. She opened the door quietly, only to see that the living room was empty, and continued on towards the kitchen._  
_The voices were muffled, yet Katie could still hear some fragments of the conversation._

_"What else is there?"_  
_It was clearly Sherlock's voice that rang out there._

_"Er, sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your moment", pointing between Sherlock and the living room. "but it wasn't the full message," John said, and slightly hesitant, he went on._  
_"The note Moriarty had left for you also said, ' **And tell your little girlfriend I'll find her and then I'll skin this stupid bitch!** '_

_If they weren't sure yet whether this was really Moriarty, with this statement they now knew for sure. John swallowed and then looked at Sherlock. As usual, his expression did not reveal anything he was thinking or feeling at that moment._

_"Strange. How could Moriarty think such a thing? She's just a client."_

_John frowned at him and cleared his throat._  
_"That didn't look like she was just a client, Sherlock," said John with a slight grin around the corner of his mouth._

_Sherlock then turned his eyes, just annoyed._  
_"She is ONLY a client. Maybe I got carried away somehow. But she means nothing to me, John!"_

_Before John could say anything back, they were interrupted by a fairly loud bang, like the slamming of a door._  
_Both looked at each other questioningly. "KATIE" both pushed out at the same time, pushed the kitchen door open and looked into an empty living room._

_"She must have heard us. We must look for her! She can't be far away yet," John asked afterwards and went out the door. Sherlock grabbed his coat and scarf and followed him._

_"That won't be necessary," John stopped Sherlock with a gesture of his hand as he was about to put on his coat and pointed to the figure sitting there on one of the steps._

_"Katie?" asked John, sat down one step below her and gently put his hand on her knee. "You overheard us, didn't you? We thought you'd gone?"_  
  
_"I wanted... ...but then I thought... I... I... I heard everything, yeah." She turned to Sherlock who was still standing in the doorway, staring at them both, and sparkled at him angrily and with a hint of disappointment in her eyes. Then she turned back to John._  
_"I want to help. If this Moriarty really wants me dead, then I will fight! I want to look that bastard who took everything from me in the eye when he ends it!"_

_"I don't think that's going to be possible" This time it was Sherlock who spoke._  
_"Moriarty hates to get his hands dirty. He's putting his killers in charge. The organisation you were tracking is just one small branch of his entire criminal network. You are now on Moriarty's list and are no longer safe."_


	3. Flashback 2- New friend

_Of course Sherlock was right in his statement. She was now on his list and should feel this in the days to come._   
_However, after living under the Baker Street roof for a few days, she could not and would not bear the presence of Sherlock and moved back to the hotel. Since the kiss and what happened after it, they had not spoken about it again. Sherlock went back to his original ME and occupied himself with Moriarty and his next moves, ignoring them for most of the time she was there. John kept apologising for his flatmate's behaviour but Katie couldn't take it any more._

_John and, strangely enough, Sherlock weren't happy about her plans but Katie didn't let that stop her._

_"Then at least let me help you find suitable accommodation" offered John._

_As they wandered the streets near Baker Street, John kept apologising for his flatmate and that he still didn't like her being left alone. Katie remained silent most of the time and listened attentively to the blond man, who was perhaps a head taller than her. Afterwards they talked a little bit about this Moriarty and Sherlock's plans. Then after some time and not far from the flat (they must have been walking in circles), they finally found suitable accommodation. It was very much in the style of the surroundings but bigger and each room had a balcony. On the roof she could see a part of a roof terrace. This time there was a porter and security at the entrances. It was more noble and less inconspicuous than the previous one._   
_Just as Katie was about to enter, John held her back and handed her a note._

_"If there's anything else or you get hungry, you're welcome to call me."_   
_Katie accepted the number with thanks and then said goodbye._

_She was lucky, there was still an empty room available. And after sorting out all the formalities and moving into her room, she decided to go out again and visit the nearby electronics store. Just in case, she had to be reachable and quickly bought one of those prepaid mobile phones that were on display there._   
_She took the note from her jacket pocket and quickly typed a message to the man who owns this number._

**_I am reachable again :)_ **   
**_Fancy going out for dinner tonight? Katie_ **

_Katie did not have to wait long for an answer._

**Hi, that's great.**   
**Sure, you have any idea where? JW**

_" **Bella Italia" on Baker Street, 6:30pm?**_

**Okay. See you tonight then. ;) JW**

_After they finished their conversation, Katie decided that she needed to freshen up her wardrobe. So she wandered around the streets a bit more and rummaged through some shops on her way._   
_A little later she found herself in her hotel room, surrounded by lots of shopping bags and scattered clothes (there was a bit of everything). At the sight of her room and the things lying around everywhere, she thought she had clearly overdone it, but she was also happy about her new clothes._   
_She now had about 1.5 hours until her dinner with John. So she took a long shower and then picked something out of her new clothes for the evening. After this terrible time she just wanted to do something for herself and feel like a woman again. Of course she knew that it was not a date. It was a dinner with a friend, well, more like a good acquaintance, which could well develop into a friendship. At least she hoped so._   
_So she decided to wear leather-look leggings. She wore a slim fitted jumper in rosé with a V-neck that exposed one of her shoulders and black bootees. On top of that she wore her longer coat. She decided to wear light make-up and to wear her hair loose. The pale roots where she dyed her hair to remain unrecognised gradually became more visible._

_Sherlock had been right again with his deduction about changing my appearance,' she thought. Her thoughts continued to wander about the detective and what he had said and done a few days earlier. It was in some way painful for her to think about it, as his testimony showed her once again that she was apparently not worth loving. Just as her father had told her over and over again at the time._

  
_It was now just after 6 and after a quick look in the mirror, she finally left her room, walked down the long corridor to the lift and down to the hotel lobby._

_Katie was about to leave the hotel and cross the street to get to her "date" when suddenly a black car, darkened windows, luxury model shot out of the corner and stopped at her._   
_"Look out!" she heard someone screaming in the background before she was pushed aside and found herself on the floor. Her arm hurt and blood was dripping from her right hand._

_"Are you all right?", the voice from earlier asked again._   
_When Katie looked up, she recognised a young woman, probably her age, with hazel hair and eyes that looked at her with concern._   
  
_"I guess so. My arm just hurts and I seem to have fallen into a piece of broken glass" and held her bleeding hand up._   
_"What happened?" she asked afterwards._

_"A car came out of nowhere and apparently tried to run her over. If this young gentleman hadn't been there, they probably would have. An ambulance and the police are already on their way. By the way, my name is Molly, Molly Hooper," said the young woman now and smiled at her._

_"Katie, Katie Wilson. Pleased to meet you. You were the voice that warned me earlier, weren't you?"_

_"You can say Molly and yes"_

_When the ambulance finally arrived, Molly slowly helped her up and took her to the paramedics. The police also arrived a little later and Molly and the young man from the security made their statement while Katie was still being cared for. They did not notice that a blond man was slowly approaching the scene of the accident._

_"Oh my God, Katie! What happened?"_   
_It was John. He was worried because Katie was not at the restaurant at the agreed time and not 15 minutes later. Since she didn't answer the messages either, let alone her mobile phone, he decided to walk towards her hotel when he found the ambulance and the police there._

_"Oh, hello John! You two know each other?" It was Molly who just joined us._

_"Molly? What are you doing here?"_

_"I was on my way over. New body parts for Sherlock and his experiments," she said, holding the cooler in the air "As I was passing by, I saw Katie about to be run over by a car"_

_John looked at Katie with concern in his eyes and then turned to her._   
_"Oh my God! How do you feel now? Honestly, I thought for a moment you might have changed your mind" and scratched the back of his head slightly embarrassed._

_"No John, never. I was just on my way to see you before this happened. And yes, I'm okay except for that." She held her arm, now bandaged, up significantly._

_John smiled at her lovingly and compassionately, grabbing the other hand from her and gently squeezing it._   
_"You see, maybe you should have stayed in Baker Street after all," joked John now._

_Molly stood beside her the whole time, watching the scene in front of her with eagle eyes and could not help but smile._

_A paramedic, who had bandaged Katie's arm before, finally interrupted the two of them:_   
_"For your safety, you must come with us to the hospital. The arm should be x-rayed and the hand examined for remaining glass fragments"._

_Katie sighed inwardly. Not again to the hospital._


	4. Flashback 3- At the hospital

_John and Molly were sitting in their chairs in front of the X-ray department and John was talking about how they met Katie when a news signal suddenly interrupted them. It was Molly's phone._

**Are you planning to work a night shift today or where are you going with my "delivery"? SH**

_Molly twisted her eyes in annoyance as she looked at John apologetically. "Sherlock."_

**_I will bring your delivery later. I'm at the hospital with John and Katie. MH_ **

_Only seconds later, a new signal sounded._

**Wait, what? How do you know Ms. Wilson? SH**

_Molly briefly wrote to Sherlock telling him what had happened and that Katie was now being examined. She was expecting an answer but nothing came._

_After Katie had been x-rayed and her hand cleaned and bandaged, she was advised to have her head examined as well. So she was taken to CT while John and Molly waited in their chairs._   
_After about 10 minutes the door to the corridor where they were sitting opened and a tall man with dark curly hair and a long black coat came in._

_"Sherlock, what are you doing here?" John asked, slightly annoyed._

_"Molly said you are in the hospital with Katie. What happened?"_

_John sighed. "I think Moriarty was going to make good on his threat. But what do you care? You've been ignoring her all this time and not said a word to her and now you show up here worried?_

_Sherlock was slightly confused by John's statement. Yeah, he was right. He had ignored it. But he just didn't know how to face her after the kiss and what she had heard afterwards. But he didn't want to tell his roommate and Molly that. So he just replied: "I... I just wanted to pick up my body parts, because I think this might take a little longer._

_Now John got angry. But he didn't want to be in the corridor where every sound was 3 times as loud, so he just grabbed the cooler and handed it to him energetically._   
_"Here, there you have it and now go!"_

_Sherlock grabbed the box but didn't make a move to leave. He lowered his head slightly ashamed._   
_"How is she doing?"_

_This time it was Molly who replied, "She's doing as well as can be expected. She has a broken arm and several cuts in her hand. They are examining her head now to rule out a concussion._

_Sherlock nodded and then sat down in the chair next to his flatmate. He just sparkled at him angrily before he turned away._   
_Several minutes of uncomfortable silence passed before John broke it._   
_"She cannot stay where she is now. And she's not coming back either. We need a safe place where she can stay."_

_"I know. I also think it's best that she leaves London. She's no longer safe here. I could ask Mycroft for help. He owes her one. After all, she did save Bloom's daughter back then. Perhaps he can put her up at his place, or somewhere else, for the time being._

_"Wait. Let me get this straight. You wanna ask your brother if he can take Katie? This is ridiculous. Then she'd rather sleep in the street or in Molly's morgue!"_

_"Molly! Of course, that's the idea!"_

_Molly sat there in silence the whole time listening to the two of them._

_"Uh, excuse me, but what about me?" she asked, although she already knew the answer._

_"What if Katie could stay with you? Just until we find something more suitable, of course!"_

_"You're not serious, Sherlock. You can't ask Molly to let a strange woman she hardly knows stay with you."_

_As John and Sherlock continued their discussion, Molly thought about the idea for a moment and hardly took any notice of what the two of them said. Katie was nice, and apparently she could be trusted. After all, both were very concerned about her, even Sherlock somehow. And a roommate was not bad either. At least then she could talk to a real person and didn't have to feel so stupid every time she told her tomcat about her day or got upset about pointless programmes on TV. And maybe she could find out a bit more about Sherlock and why he was so worried about her. So it wasn't such a bad idea._

_"I agree. She can stay with me," she finally replied._

_"Can I have a say in this too?"_

_All three turned to the person standing in front of them, now with a plaster arm and a bandaged hand._


	5. Flashback 4- You have to go

_Katie still wasn't quite sure and felt slightly uncomfortable at the thought but Molly was so kind, understanding and caring. It was now a week since she agreed to the proposal and moved her things out of the hotel and into Molly's house. She had a small flat, very neat and clean. Unlike John and Sherlock's. She had immediately taken her tomcat into her heart, and from the first impression, I think it was mutual. Molly wanted to offer her her bedroom for the time being but Katie insisted on taking the sofa. Molly was so lovely and helpful and Katie was so grateful for everything she did for her._

_Over the next few weeks, their friendship grew stronger and stronger. Sometimes she would visit her at work (the first time she had her cast off) and invite her to lunch. The evenings were mostly spent together cooking and watching TV. She continued to watch Sherlock and John. Sometimes she would meet John alone for lunch or dinner. They saw each other more and more often and often spent the afternoons in the park on a leisurely walk or in Molly's flat together. John once told her that Sherlock was jealous that they spent so much time together and that he had less time for him and the Falls. Katie was uncomfortable at the thought of squeezing in between him and Sherlock and urged John to focus more on the Falls again. They could continue to see each other in his free time but she didn't want to be to blame if the friendship between them were to falter._   
_One time Sherlock showed up at Molly's flat and apologised for his behaviour over the past few weeks. Then he thanked Katie for bringing John to his senses, kissed her on the cheek and as quickly as he had come, he was gone._   
_From then on, she saw Sherlock and John relatively rarely. Things also became quieter with regard to Moriarty. Katie knew it was just the calm before the storm but wanted to enjoy the calm with her new friends._

_Then one evening Sherlock suddenly appeared at her door and wanted to talk to her. Molly had the night shift today, which Sherlock knew, of course._   
_As soon as he entered, he went straight to the sofa. He always behaved like that. As if he lived here himself._

_"You'll be leaving tomorrow. My brother has organised everything and you must leave London as soon as possible," Sherlock said as he sat down on the sofa._

_Katie didn't know what happened to her. Out of the blue he comes here and says something like that. She sat down too but with a little distance between her and him. Which is easier than I said because it was only a 2-seater._

_"I do not understand. We haven't heard from Moriarty in weeks, why now?"_

_Sherlock took a deep breath before continuing: "That's not quite right. To be honest, I've often received messages from him that concern you and your death, among others. You are no longer safe here and I can no longer protect you"_

_That was too much. Protect- HE? When has he ever done that in the last few weeks?_   
_"Wait! You, protect me?! Please, when, when have you ever done that in the last few weeks except ignore me all the time? Or was it part of your great plan," she replied angrily, drawing inverted commas in the air in disapproval of the word "plan"._

_"Katie, please..." he sighed._

_"No, I'm talking now! You think when you show up here you'll explain to me why you've been acting like an ass to me all this time, just to protect me? Oh, and now you want me to leave London because you're worried that you can't protect me anymore. And I'm just supposed to say, "Sure, Sherlock. I will. What time's my flight?" God, you really have no idea about human nature, do they? You know, I don't care that you've been a dick about it and just think of me as a client but why the hell did you kiss me?! Or do you kiss all your clients when they take the case?"_

_Katie continued to glare at him angrily. As she continued to turn to him and her knees touched, she felt a strange sting in the pit of her stomach. She was about to get up and ask him to leave, but then Sherlock grabbed her by her wrist and pulled her down to him. Before Katie knew what was happening to her, his lips landed on hers. She tried to avoid him, but the feeling in her stomach suddenly got stronger. A pleasant warmth was now flowing through her whole body. She sighed against his lips but let it happen._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that the review sequence is so long but as it is sometimes the case, once you are writing, you just can't stop :D


	6. Old friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, here comes the resolution ;) But I think you already know who is standing in front of the door :)

And now, 2 years later, Katie was sitting on her couch, coffee cup in hand, staring at the documents Jack had secretly left her to help him with this case. The city has been plagued for several months by a serial killer who has claimed 7 victims so far, mostly women between 20 and 35 years old. All were raped. Some of them postmortem. The head was then separated from the body. The media gave it the casual name "The executioner-killer". She remembered that there had already been a case with similar behaviour patterns in the 1970s. Just as she was about to read the written script of the interview with the imprisoned serial killer Henry James, she was disturbed by a knock on her door.

It was now almost midnight and she normally did not expect any visitors at this time. Probably her neighbour Claire again, who had had another fight with her boyfriend.  
Katie sighed and slurped towards the door in her short pyjamas and slippers.  
"Claire, do you know how --" 

She suddenly froze when she realised that it was not her neighbour standing there in front of her. It was a tall man, dressed in dark jeans and a hooded jacket. His clothes were dirty and he hid his head under the hood.   
'Oh no, not another junkie like that,' she thought.   
There were a lot of them in her neighbourhood and sometimes, usually when they were high, they would get lost in her house. But she never thought of moving away from here. She loved her flat and it was cheap.  
She turned her attention back to the man at her door. Her blood froze in her veins instantly as his voice sounded.

"You'd better be careful and not open the door arbitrarily for everyone. It is a dangerous area where you live"  
Then he raised his head slightly and smiled.

Katie immediately recognised who was standing in front of her, even in spite of the slight shadow of a beard. It was the man she had fallen in love with years ago, who still haunted her dreams and whom she wanted to forget. The man who was supposed to be dead. The one who jumped off a roof and committed suicide shortly after her departure.

"Sher... Sherlock?", she asked in surprise, tapping her finger on his chest to make sure he was real.

Her reaction confused him slightly. 

"Can we continue this inside, please?" reached for her hand and asked for access to her flat.  
Katie left him and absent-mindedly opened the door, stepping aside so he could enter. 

Sherlock immediately ran to her living room, then to her couch (as he had always done with Molly's flat) and inspected her papers scattered around the table. Katie still stood rigidly at the door, knob in hand, looking at the seemingly undead detective in her living room. 

"Ah, I see you've met Mr Hunter?"

This question confused her but Katie would not be Katie if she did not understand right away.   
She breathed deeply and sighed. "Ah, of course. Her brother. Jack will probably be a collaborator or informer or whatever.

Sherlock grinned at her statement. He knew she was smart.

"And I see you're helping him with some of the cases. With your degree in forensic psychiatry, this should be child's play for you."

She was not wondering where he got this information from. Surely his brother Mycroft had had it checked at the time, after it had entered his little brother's life.

"Sherlock?"

He slowly let go of the papers and turned to her. Only now did he realise she was only wearing short pajamas. The last time he saw her with so few clothes on was two years ago. She had tied her hair into a somewhat untidy knot. They were now reddish-brown, which brought out the colour of her eyes even more clearly. The eyes in which he had become so lost at that time.

"What are you doing here?" she asked in a slightly sarcastic tone.

"It sounds as if you're not really happy to see me, Katie."

"I haven't been called that for a long time. Have you forgotten? Her brother wiped me out, or Katie Wilson and her life. My name has been Jane, Jane Matthews for two years now. But you probably already knew that. How else would you know which door to knock on? Unless they were watching me," she replied, her head slightly tilted.

"So what are you doing here, with me in Chicago? A case, or do you need to ask Jack for your brother a little bit more about me, if I have kept my agreements?"

"Well, if it's okay, I'd prefer Katie. And no, I'm not here to interrogate Mr Hunter," Sherlock replied, then sat down on her couch and indicated to her to sit down too. 

Katie pondered for a moment, after all, the last time she sat next to him was a bit different from what she'd thought, just as well this one was a bit bigger than Molly's. So she was able to sit a little further away from Sherlock.   
Sherlock noticed her hesitant behaviour and that she clearly tried not to be too close to him, but said nothing.   
Instead, he began to talk about the days after her departure, about Moriarty and his death, and that he himself had to die to save the lives of his friends. Of course, it was all fake, so that he could pursue his further plan. He also told her that Molly had been privy to the plan and that he must now destroy Moriarty's network worldwide and is here in Chicago because Moriarty had also infiltrated a member of the FBI. Then he asked for their help, as he needed a hiding place during his stay.

Katie listened attentively all the time and avoided interrupting him with any interposed questions. When he was finished, thousands of questions flashed through her mind but she could only think of one.  
"Does John know you're alive?"

Sherlock's gaze went down.   
"No. I'm not finished. And I don't want him to know yet either. Katie, (now he turned to her a bit further and looked at her face) "I know you're still in contact with John," he said in a slightly reproachful tone.

Oh crap. Caught. He knew it. But actually it was foreseeable, considering who he is and who his brother is. 

It was true. She had contact with him for a long time after she left. In the beginning mostly in the form of messages. John was less thrilled that she was putting herself in such danger, but he kept in touch. But after hearing about Moriarty's death and Sherlock's jump from the roof on the news, she decided to call him.   
The detective's suicide hit her hard. It took several weeks before she was able to work again, let alone leave her flat. But she also knew that there was someone else who had been even more affected by the news. So a little later she dialled his number. She wanted to hear his voice and ask for him. John did not want to talk about it at first. He didn't want to talk at all but Katie managed to change his mind somehow. John also asked several times, now that Moriarty was dead, if she would come back now. But Katie decided not to. She wanted to start a new life without these annoying thoughts of this detective. After that the contact became less. Now and then they still wrote to each other or telephoned. 

But now that she knew about the living detective, she was not sure if she could keep the secret from John.

A short clearing brought her back to the present. Only now did she notice that she hadn't said anything for several minutes and was staring thoughtlessly into the air. Her cheeks suddenly heated up at the thought of John. She quickly lowered her head and grabbed the papers in front of her to distract attention.  
Suddenly she paused as a statement of his explanation shot back into her head.

"Wait, you said that Moriarty had infiltrated the FBI? Does that mean Jack is a spy who's supposed to be tracking him down? And does that mean I might have had one of Moriarty's killers around all this time?"

Katie lost all colour from her face at the thought. Sherlock knew that she was trying to avoid his previous question with her question, but first answered her hunch. He would come back to John later. 

"Yes, that's exactly how it is. Mr. Hunter is actually a special agent of MI-5 and my brother has placed him and others in various organisations to gather further information. Mr. Hunter was also for their protection, as I knew they would have difficulties maintaining their identity. Which I was right about! Oh, and he'll be here any minute."   
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'd like to freshen up before he gets here. 

He was just about to get up and go to her bathroom when Katie also got up and held him back.  
"No!" she cried now.   
"Who do you think you are! You can't just turn up here, come back from the dead, tell me that story and then just settle down here!"

Sherlock looked at her confused and completely dumbfounded. Her reaction surprised him. Of course she was right, but he had and wanted no other choice. He thought about how he could get her to change her mind. 

"Maybe I should pay her a compliment, like I always do with Molly when I want something. Maybe about her looks? No, that would probably be unwise, since she doesn't wear much clothes. Although she does look quite attractive in that short two-piece. What "God no, what am I thinking?"

"Er, Sherlock? Thanks, but that's not going to help. I'm not Molly," she suddenly said and, despite her annoyance, had to wipe away a slight grin. 

'Oh, my God! Had I said that out loud?', he thought now.   
At once he turned away from her.  
Katie, who saw his reaction, could no longer hold on to herself and had to laugh. The great Sherlock Holmes- embarrassed. 

"Okay good. You can use my bathroom and get cleaned up. After that, you have a few things to explain to me!"

She showed him the bathroom, put out some more fresh towels and then left him alone. Knowing that her boyfriend Jack, was he now even her boyfriend? was coming over, she quickly went into her bedroom and at least threw on her dressing gown.   
Then she went to her kitchen and prepared some tea. She actually needed something stronger now, but she had to go shopping again. Tea had to be enough for now. 

She then sat back down on the couch with a cup in her hand and thought again about Sherlock's request. Should she really let him stay here, even if only for a short time?what if the same thing happened as 2 years ago? And what if he was diverting things from her that she wanted to keep hidden?

She was interrupted in her thoughts when a little later the bathroom door opened and Sherlock stepped out.  
He was now dressed only with a towel around his waist. His hair was still slightly damp. He had tried to comb it back but it kept falling into his face. His body looked slightly more muscular than 2 years ago and the shadow of his beard made him look more masculine. Despite some cuts and injuries he still looked pretty good.

Katie must have stared at him and sat there with her mouth slightly open, as she noticed that a mischievous grin was now on his face.

"Tea?" she asked. Her voice went up and squeaked slightly. She cleared her throat briefly and then asked again. "Would you like some tea?"

Sherlock nodded and as Katie walked to the kitchen she mumbled softly to herself.  
"God, I need a booze."

"Well, you'll enjoy that now." Sherlock now stood behind her and whispered softly in her ear with his low baritone voice. Oh, God, that voice. Katie noticed her knees starting to soften.   
A knock on the door brought her back from her thoughts.   
It took a few seconds for Katie to understand. She carefully moved away from him and opened the door.

"Good evening, Jane. I'm sorry to disturb you so late."   
Jack didn't really know what to say or if she already knew who he was.  
" But I need the documents back," Jack greeted her. Around his shoulder was a small travelling bag. Probably clothes for Sherlock.  
"I know about you, Jack. You can stop acting now. Sherlock is in there waiting for you"

Jack understood and could you hear relief in his breathing? He stepped in and then walked towards the living room. He turned to her once more and handed her a bottle of bourbon.   
"Sherlock thought you might need it."

Then he walked further in the direction in which he found Sherlock, still dressed only in a towel. 

"Mr. Holmes. I'm glad you're all right and you made it. I just didn't expect to see so much of you right away," he said somewhat embarrassed and then handed him the bag. Katie decided not to disturb them. She didn't really want to know what they were discussing and retreated back to the kitchen with the bottle in her hand.


	7. Drunk

About 5 glasses later (she could take a lot), Jack joined Katie and Jane in the kitchen. She didn't look at him and poured herself a 6th glass instead.

"Jane, listen"

"My name is Katie, but I think you already know that," she interrupted him and took another sip. 

Jack frowned in confusion and sighed before continuing. "Well, I honestly knew nothing about your former identity. I only received your present name for information. So I would like to leave it at that. So listen to me. "I'm sorry I kept you in the dark all these years. I'm truly sorry I could never tell you the truth but it was for your protection and for Mr Holmes'. What I don't regret is that we had this, or rather had it now. I loved spending time with you and I really like you very much. Of course I can understand if you don't want to have anything more to do with me now. But I hope not"

Katie put her glass on the counter and then turned to him. There was anger and disappointment in her eyes. Tears formed in the corners of her eyes. 

"Jack. I don't even know who you really are. And I don't know what you told me is even true. How can I be with someone who's been lying to me all this time?! And you don't have to come up with an excuse to protect me! I've heard that before." And she looked at the living room. Since the kitchen was right next door and there was no door, Sherlock could certainly hear her conversation.  
"I don't know what's going to happen to us now. I need time to think."  
Then she turned away again. Tears were now flowing down her cheeks.

Jack wanted to put his hand on her shoulder, but then decided against it. Instead, he turned around, muttered a slightly sad "Goodbye, Jane" and walked out the door.

"Goodbye, Mr. Holmes. I'll see you in two days' time at the agreed meeting place," he said goodbye to Sherlock and then left her flat.  
Katie was still standing in the kitchen, leaning over the counter, her hands holding her head and crying over her broken and lying relationship. 

Suddenly she felt a hand resting comfortingly on her shoulder. She knew it was Sherlock. Then she turned around and grabbed the bottle of bourbon, her glass, took another glass from her kitchen cupboard and reached for Sherlock's hand. She noticed only casually that he was now also wearing pyjama bottoms and a T-shirt. 

"You're drinking with me now," she asked him and pulled him to the couch with her. Once there, she let herself fall and poured herself and Sherlock a glass each.  
Sherlock was confused and wanted to say something, but Katie waved away.

"No, Sherlock. I don't want to talk about it now. I just want to drink and numb the pain" and held out his glass to him.

After some time and an infinite number of glasses, the bottle now almost empty, they both found themselves giggling in front of the couch, sitting on the floor. Sherlock had told her about his most bizarre and amusing cases and how he once sat in Buckingham Palace dressed only in a sheet. Katie had to laugh so hard at this performance that she lost her balance (the alcohol level might have had its share of it) and suddenly landed with her head in Sherlock's lap. However, as both of them were already quite drunk, Katie a little more than him, she didn't immediately make the effort to straighten up again. They just kept laughing. Sherlock then told her about his time with Molly and how he fought for the sofa with her cat every day.   
At some point they started talking about John. John was very sad after her departure and Sherlock realised that he had fallen in love with her. So it was all the more difficult for him to pretend to John that he was dead. Katie also told him that she also had romantic feelings for John before the time with Jack. She also wanted to fly back to London one day (shortly after his death) just to see him but decided against it.   
As she was telling the story she noticed that tears started to come to her eyes again and some of them were released from the corners of her eyes. Sherlock noticed this and wiped them away with his finger. Katie had stood up again and was now looking into his face, into his eyes.   
This gesture brought back memories of her first kiss. Then she turned away and reached for the empty bottle in front of her.

"What is it with you men?" took a deep breath, nestling her fingers further into the bottle. The alcohol seemed to evaporate. "Why, do I always have to fall in love with those where it seems hopeless in the end? I mean, first I fall in love with you, then John, and then Jack, who had lied to me all along. I really felt with him that he could be the one." she sighed.   
"But you're probably right. Feelings are just a chemical defect that can be found on the losing side. Sometimes I wish I could be as rational as you and shut out any feelings. Well (deep sigh). It is what it is.  
So, I think that was enough for today (holding up the empty bottle). I'm going to bed. You can stay here, of course. I hope the couch is okay. I'll bring you another blanket and pillow in a minute. Good night, Sherlock."

Then she stood up. At least she tried, as the alcohol had seriously affected her balance. She staggered around the small table and went into her bedroom, only to come out a little later with a blanket and pillow.  
Sherlock remained sitting quietly and motionless the whole time. Then, when she wanted to hand him the bedding, he stood up. He reached for her shoulders, turned her over and looked deep and hard into her eyes.

"Never change, Katie. You're good as you are and I like you just the same!"   
To reinforce his words, he then kissed her on the forehead and smiled. 

He actually wanted to tell her why he denied everything in front of John and that he had fallen in love with her too but was afraid of these new feelings. Instead he turned away, thanked her and wished her a good night.


	8. Secret

The next morning came quickly. Thank God it was Sunday and she did not have to work. Her drinking binge from yesterday was also beginning to make itself felt and she was glad that her curtains were closed. Her head was pounding and she felt a pressure in her stomach.   
However, it was not the usual uncomfortable feeling that one occasionally gets when drinking too much alcohol. It was rather a cosy, warm and strangely protective feeling. Carefully she felt her stomach and felt a hand. It was definitely not hers. It had long fingers, longer than hers, and felt strong. As she or her head was not yet ready to move, she carefully grabbed her hand behind her and felt the body that lay behind her. A slight grumbling finally made her flinch. 

It was Sherlock who lay there behind her and snuggled up close to her. Katie couldn't remember everything that happened last night. OK, she still had her clothes on. Then this didn't happen again. Then it occurred to her. They had laughed a lot and drunk a lot. And talking. And she had cried. Oh, God, not again. She was always uncomfortable being so vulnerable in front of him. Then she went on thinking about what she had said and why she had to cry?

'Oh God, I hope I didn't tell him about the first months here and all that...' she thought.   
Katie suddenly started to feel nauseous and she quickly let go of Sherlock's grip, swung out of her bed and ran into the bathroom.

After a few minutes there was a knock on the door and a worried Sherlock was standing on the other side.  
"Is everything all right with you?"  
She did not answer.

"Katie? Open the door or I will!"  
No reply again.

Just as he was about to move the handle of the door down, he noticed a slight resistance and the door opened. The sight that appeared to him there startled him. She looked pale and her eyes were red. 

"Sherlock, what exactly happened last night?" Of course she thought she could have blamed it on the alcohol but she had to know what he knew.

Sherlock sighed and brushed some of his curls off his face. He pondered briefly what he should say. Then he started to talk, but let it out about her feelings for him.

"You had obviously been quite hurt that your boyfriend had lied to you and pretended to you all the time. And obviously you wanted to forget it with the help of alcohol. You also literally forced me to drink with you. There was a lot of talk, mostly about my past cases. 

Katie breathed a sigh of relief when she heard that they had apparently only talked about his cases. But should she really believe him? His reaction made her wonder. 

"OK, and what else?" she kept asking, as Sherlock seemed to avoid her gaze.

"Hmm? Oh, you were talking about feelings and stuff. About John and Mr Hunter and..."  
He casually waved his hand at the word feeling, but still wasn't looking at her.

"And?" Katie just wouldn't let go. She knew there was something else.

Now he turned to her and looked into her eyes.  
"And that you were in love with me," he said afterwards and breathed deeply.

Okay, it wasn't planned that way. Yet she was strangely relieved. Apparently he knew nothing else. Probably it would be best if she took it to her grave. He would be gone in a couple of days anyway and thus out of her life. 

"Okay, well! (clapped his hands) Now that that's settled, would you like some coffee?" she asked and then went into the kitchen.

Sherlock was amazed at her reaction. Apparently she had expected something else. And she was scared. Afraid that HE would probably find out something. Something she had to hide. Something about him. He couldn't find an answer to that question right now and that bothered him.

Reluctantly he followed her into the kitchen and then sat down at one of the chairs at the counter. While she prepared the coffee and prepared something for breakfast, he watched her carefully. This one question kept running through his mind. What did she have to hide? When he could hardly stand it any longer, the words left his mouth.

"You were actually expecting something else I was going to say, right? What exactly were you thinking?"

Katie, who was about to cut some bread, paused and froze. Damn it. He had noticed. She pushed the air out. She hadn't even noticed that she had stopped it. Then she turned to him. She tried to pretend to be clueless and throw the ball back.

"What do you think? I did not expect anything. But since you ask me that, why were you in my bed this morning?"

Sherlock had anticipated that she was trying to avoid his question with a counter-question.

He just shrugged his shoulders and chose the only plausible answer.   
"The couch was a bit uncomfortable."

"Uh-huh."   
She then frowned in confusion. But she decided to accept this and hope that he would leave it at that. Instead, she now handed him his coffee.

"Black, 2 sugars, right?" put the cup down in front of him and went with her own to her balcony.

The weather today was again very nice and pleasantly mild. She sat down in her chair, hoping that Sherlock would not follow her. She was not prepared to talk to him about it. 

She was lucky and Sherlock actually left her alone. After a while she heard the water running in the shower. She reached behind her on the ledge in the window and took out her pack of cigarettes. She lit one on fire and then puffed out the smoke to calm her down. She had started doing this a few years ago but only occasionally. She was not a regular consumer, only in certain stressful situations did she need a cigarette now and then. And that was exactly what was now such a stressful situation for her. It relaxed her in a strange way, but she could live very well without it.

"Those things will kill you one day! Since when do you smoke?"  
A voice suddenly startled her. Sherlock had apparently already finished and had sneaked up on her quietly or she didn't notice because she was in her thoughts.

"Now and again. But what do you care about that anyway? As far as I know, you consume much worse things," she replied to him annoyed.

Katie took one last puff, then expressed it and stood up. She stood before him.

"It's my business and you can't care. And if I were to smoke a pack at once, you couldn't care less and now excuse me!" 

She took her empty coffee cup off the table and then pushed past Sherlock. She then went into the kitchen, put hers and Sherlock's in the sink and then moved towards the bathroom.  
Sherlock was still standing there, staring at her. He wondered briefly whether he should give himself up to pleasure again after a long time as well, when he was interrupted by her voice.

"Don't bother! The box is empty!" Then she disappeared into the bathroom and Sherlock sat down, exhausted, in the chair Katie had sat in before, watching the people gathering in the park in front of him.


	9. A normal day

The rest of the day went without any problems. Sherlock hadn't asked her again about this morning's. Most of the time they talked about Sherlock's plans for the future. Tomorrow he was to meet with Jack to track down Moriarty's man. After that, when he was finished here, he would have to go to Serbia, where the last henchmen in Moriarty's network were to be found. Only then could he return to London. 

Every now and then he asked about her life and her "secret" help for Jack. They also talked about the current serial killer case, which has upset the city. Sherlock, of course, believed he had already solved the case, but kept his head down with the solution.  
He knew that she was smart and would come up with the solution herself.

Then he rummaged through her bookshelf and one book in particular jumped out at him. It was a book about the life and murders of H.H. Holmes. Katie used it mainly for work purposes. She analysed his behaviour and compared it with existing patterns of other serial killers.

Sherlock obviously enjoyed talking to her about it and at some point it became a game for both of them to identify famous serial killers in history through various puzzles and behaviour patterns. 

He enjoyed the time with her and did not want it to end. If he didn't already have feelings for this woman who was there in front of him and was preparing something for dinner, he would have them now. 

But he also knew that he could never reveal them. Tomorrow he would hopefully finish his mission here, and then he would have to leave her again. He also didn't know if he would come out of his last mission alive and didn't want to give her any hope. He was also not sure if she would still feel the same way.   
Yes, she had told him that she was in love with him but she was also in love with John and this Jack. With this one she even thought he was the love of her life.   
At that thought, he suddenly felt a touch of jealousy and a strange tightening feeling in his chest.  
  
Two years ago he had his chance. Two years ago it could have been him, but after they had spent the night together the night before their departure, he decided to leave the next morning quietly and secretly. He did not say goodbye to her either. Well, he was there at the airport but he was hiding. He didn't know whether she wanted to see him at all afterwards. 

And then she was gone, gone from his life but not from his thoughts. All the years he had been on the road he kept thinking about her, her first kiss and that night. When he finally heard from his brother that he was going to Chicago, he saw his second chance had come. But now that he is here, he is no longer sure what he should do.   
Katie had managed to make a new life for herself here, albeit without him and not in London. But did he really want that?

Katie was just putting Sherlock's plate down when she noticed that he seemed somehow absent.

"Sherlock, are you all right?"

The question suddenly rattled his mind. He looked up and looked into her worried eyes.

"I was just going over the plan for tomorrow. And I thought it would be better if you were to stay home tomorrow. We don't know if Moriarty's husband knows about you and I think you'll be safer here"

"Sherlock. I can't do this. I MUST work. Unlike you, I have to work for a living." Oh, that sounded more reproachful than I expected.  
"I... I'm sorry.... I mean --"

"Yes, I understand, but it's too dangerous right now.  
A trace of disappointment at her statement spread through him.

Katie took a deep breath and then exhaled.  
"Okay, I'll think about it. Now eat before it gets cold." Now she smiled slightly.

They both ate in silence and now and then gave each other a few furtive looks. Afterwards he helped with the washing up and agreed to spend the evening with her, as John had called it, with a bit of, how did John call it, scrap TV. She especially liked the series " _Mindhunter_ ". It was interesting in some way and on closer inspection he realised that the stories were similar to the one Mr. Hunter was doing incognito. That's probably why she liked them. He also avoided his usual interjections when something was obvious and the agents were just too stupid to notice.   
Katie noticed and was slightly confused but touched by his efforts. 

After the 3rd episode he noticed a slight pressure on his shoulders. Katie had fallen asleep and was now resting with her head there. He smiled at the sight of her. Careful not to wake her, he finally lifted her gently into his arms and carried her to her bed. Gently he laid her down, put the blanket over her body and brushed the hair out of her face.   
He lingered for a moment before bending down and pressing a kiss on her forehead.  
Katie sighed comfortably under his touch but did not wake up. 

Then he turned around and walked to the couch where he would spend the night this time. But as he couldn't sleep, he decided to continue watching this series. 

At some point he noticed that his eyelids were getting heavy and he slowly sank into a deep sleep.


	10. Tracked

When she woke up in her bed the next morning, the living room was empty. She was aware that she had fallen asleep on the couch last night and Sherlock had carried her to bed. But now he was nowhere to be seen. A glance at the clock told her that it was already 9:00am and he was probably meeting Jack. She should be at her workplace in about 2 hours. However, Sherlock had asked her to spend the day at home. She was still not sure what to do. So first she made herself a strong cup of coffee and took a shower. After she was halfway awake and had a second cup of coffee, she decided to sign off from work for the day. The reason she gave was a slight indigestion. Her boss was very understanding as she was rarely ill and wished her a good recovery. 

Katie briefly thought about what she should do on her day off. She usually went for a walk in the park or along the pier on her days off, but Sherlock told her to stay in the flat. 

So she decided to spend the morning cleaning up her flat. As she only had a very small flat, it went faster than she thought and 1.5 hours later she was ready and lying on her couch with a book, or more precisely the book that Sherlock took off her shelf yesterday. She could only concentrate a little. Her thoughts kept wandering over and over again about the past two days and the time she had spent with Sherlock. He was completely different from the days she had spent with him back then in Baker Street. He was courteous, polite and even helped her with everyday things. It was almost like the night she fell in love with him. She had to admit to herself that her feelings for him had never really subsided. She had only tried to distract herself with her ex-boyfriend Jack but she never felt for him for a second as she did for Sherlock. And John, yes she liked John very much but secretly she had to admit to herself that it was just a distraction. And then there was the one thing that made her never really forget Sherlock. Deep in her thoughts, her mood changed visibly. All of a sudden she was overcome by a feeling of sadness.   
It was early afternoon and she decided to make another long-overdue phone call. It was the same time they always talked on the phone and she knew that he would be available now.  
So with slightly shaking hands she dialled the number and hoped he would pick up. 

**Oh, hello Katie.**

**_Hello John. Is this a bad time? I wanted to hear a familiar voice again._**  
 **No, no, it's fine. I'm on a bit of a break. How are you doing? I haven't heard from you in a while. How's Jack?**  
 _ **Thank you, actually, it could be better. Hmm, well, how can I put this... Jack and I split up, and frankly, I don't care. But how are you doing?**_  
 **Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. What happened?**  
 **I'm fine. I met a woman a few months ago. She's one of the nurses in the practice and I think she might be the one for me...** -Break-   
**_John?_**   
**Oh, I'm sorry, I** _just_ **realised that maybe I shouldn't have told you that now with your separation.**  
 _ **No, no, it's fine. I'm really happy for you. What's her name?**_

John noticed that she was avoiding his question but he didn't want to probe any further. Apparently she was not ready to talk about it.

**Her name is Mary. You'd like her. She's very perceptive, never lets anyone tell her anything and has her heart in the right place.**  
 ** _And will you ask her to marry you? Maybe you're right and she's just the one you've been waiting for all your life. In any case, don't take too long._** (short break)  
 ** _How is Molly actually doing? Is she still with that guy Tom?_**  
 **Oh, Molly's fine too. They are engaged recently and she seems to be floating on cloud nine.**  
 ** _I'm glad to hear that. Well, give her my best wishes and give her my love._**  
 **I will do that. And, Katie, no matter what happens... Cheer up. The right one will be out there for you somewhere. And if not in Chicago, you'll just come back to London.**  
 **I'm sorry, I've got to get back. We can talk on the phone later, if you want.**  
 ** _Yeah, okay. See you later. Bye, John._**

Okay, it wasn't as planned but she was happy for John and also for Molly. About Molly's fiancé, John had once said that he had a lot in common with Sherlock, but that he was just an ordinary guy. At least not a sociopath. Katie had already noticed that Molly was in love with Sherlock and had felt extremely guilty after their night together. She hadn't told her about it until today either. But Molly still seemed to have noticed it somehow, because when she left she looked at her with the same understanding and compassionate look she always gave Katie when Sherlock humiliated her. So she was all the more pleased for her now that she seemed to have gotten over the detective. Unlike Katie. She wondered again and again what this man actually had in him and why she felt that way about him. 

Anyway, where is he now? Another look at the clock showed that it was already late afternoon. He was still not there or would he not even come back and, as he had done then, not even say goodbye to her?  
She had to keep herself busy somehow, to distract from the thoughts. So she reached for the documents Jack had given her. Then she remembered that she was expecting an important letter and that the mail was long gone. She could still go to the letter box, she finally thought.

So she grabbed her keys and stepped out into the hall and down the stairs. She lived on the second floor of the house. The letterboxes were down the hallway near the entrance door. As she descended the last few steps, she suddenly noticed a strange and disturbing atmosphere. The corridors were completely empty. Nowhere was any of her neighbours to be seen. Normally most people return home from work at this time of day. But this time she saw no one. It was almost eerie. She decided to walk quickly to the letterbox and then back to her flat. A quick look into her box showed that it was empty. Just as she was about to close the flap again, she suddenly felt something cold and metallic on her neck.

"Don't say a word and come along slowly"  
The voice sounded threatening but somehow familiar and when she turned to her attacker, he increased the pressure on the knife at her throat. 

  
**Meanwhile with Sherlock**

Sherlock and Jack were searching the office of the man who turned out to be one of Moriarty's henchmen when they suddenly came across some strange photos and looked at them in horror. 

He had left their flat very early that day. He only hoped that she would comply with his request and stay at home. Today he wanted to take care of Moriarty's employee, who had infiltrated the FBI, and if all goes well, he would kill two birds with one stone. And tomorrow, when it was done, he would have to leave her again.

He was sitting at the agreed meeting place an hour earlier, impatiently waiting for Jack. Jack wanted to bring him to FBI headquarters today so he could finish his work. When he finally arrived, he told Sherlock that he had not seen "their man" today.   
As it turned out, the man had left work very early today. They both used this opportunity to look around and gather more information about his current stay.   
The office was small and rather untidy. The name "H. Bennett - Janitor" was written on the door. It was located downstairs in the basement of the building. Everywhere cleaning utensils were standing or lying around. There was no window and at the other end in the middle was a small desk, over which all the papers were scattered. It looked as if he was looking for something and then fleeing his office.   
Jack was leafing through the papers on the desk when he suddenly came across some photos and paused.

"Er, Mr Holmes? I think you might be interested?

Sherlock, who was just about to examine the desk below, stood up. Jack laid the photos out on the desk, spread apart. Sherlock froze when he saw what was in front of him. There were several pictures of corpses with severed heads. As he looked further across the photos, he noticed some pictures that didn't match.  
These pictures always showed one and the same person. Mostly she was photographed at her work or at the entrance of her house. There was also a picture of her and Sherlock together.

"That makes no sense. What does he want from her," Jack asked with a frown and stroked through his hair.

But Sherlock did not answer. Read the pictures instead and stormed out of the caretaker's office. Jack sighed and followed him.


	11. In the trap

Katie was still standing in her hallway with a knife at her throat, praying that one of her neighbours or Sherlock would come through the door. Of course she was unlucky.

"What do you want?" she asked in a trembling voice.

"You turn around very slowly now and don't make a sound!" he said threateningly.  
Then he turned her towards the staircase and led her up the floors. Still none of her neighbours. Arriving at her flat door, he indicated to her to open it. With trembling fingers she took her keys and fiddled with the lock.

The man behind her slowly became impatient and increased the pressure of the knife again. She felt something warm running down her neck. It was blood.  
"Hurry up! Open the damn door!"

Katie finally made it and pushed the front door open. The man led her to one of her chairs at the bar, pushed her roughly on it and tied her arms behind the chair. He pulled the ropes out of his pocket first. Katie still couldn't get a look at him. Only when he stepped out from behind her could she see who was standing in front of her.

"Mr. Bennett? Holden?" she asked in surprise.

He didn't bother to answer and instead went to her coffee table and picked up the documents. Then he spoke.

"Ah, I see that Mr Hunter has asked for your help in this case. And have you come up with a solution yet?"

"You are the executioner-killer." It was more a statement than a question.

Holden grinned crookedly to confirm her suspicions.  
"And what is your analysis? I'm quite curious to know how you came up with it or did your little friend, the detective, help you?" and casually waved the knife in the air.

Katie twisted her eyes in annoyance at his question. She took a deep breath and then began to talk.

"It is quite obvious that you were interested in the murders of Henry James in the 1970s and developed a certain fascination for them early on. As time went by, this fascination grew and the pressure to do the same. So you began to study and analyse his methods carefully to identify the mistakes that led to his arrest. But unlike Henry James, you had less of a sexual motive. I also quickly realised, based on the changing patterns and that you were becoming more and more careful with the "clean up" from crime to crime, that you were quite familiar with the FBI's work. This led me to the conclusion that the killer is somewhere there. But you could not be an agent. It would have been too obvious and the colleagues would have discovered you quickly. So what else could be possible? It had to be someone who knew his way around the FBI, who knew every nook and cranny, but who seemed rather inconspicuous to the others. In the beginning it was all about satisfying you and satisfying your desires, but you became careless and knew that you would need help if you wanted to continue. And you definitely wanted that. Like all serial killers, you kill for an end in themselves. You are all about power. Power over life and death."  
Katie breathed deeply.  
"And that makes me think you're the man who works for Moriarty."

Holden, who had listened attentively to her explanations the whole time, grinned crookedly again before he moved the knife back in her direction.

"Well, I must say I'm not entirely surprised you found out but I'm really honoured. Of course, you have got it all down precisely and correctly. You could be competing with Sherlock Holmes.  
I heard at the time about a man who acted as a criminal consultant. Criminal Consulting they called it. So I contacted this one and it turned out to be James Moriarty. He gave me a lot of valuable tips and so I started working for the FBI as a caretaker a little later. With my position, I was able to keep an eye on the agents and the investigation at all times and to study their working methods closely. After many important observations and analyses, I began to put my work into practice. As a thank you, I gave him information about the FBI work and ongoing investigations from time to time".  
He moved on.  
"I never really had any sexual interest in it. Let's just say it was just the cherry on top of the cake."  
Now he stood close in front of her and looked down on her.

"And what are you going to do now? Are you going to kill me too, cut off my head and rape me afterwards, just like you did with the women before me?" she asked and stared up at him with sparkling eyes. 

He grinned and then slowly bent down to her. His mouth was now close to her ear. He held the knife towards her.

"You know, I've always liked you. Ever since the first time I saw you in that bar. And you were always so nice to me. You're going to be my showpiece and contrary to my usual practice, I want YOU to live while I fuck the soul out of you!" With his other hand he pulled the strap of her shirt off her shoulder and bit into it. The knife hovered close over her chest.

Katie had to scream and she suddenly felt sick. She thought she was going to throw up but she had to calm down. Now he drove the knife under her shirt and let it slide slowly between her breasts. From there it slid slowly and with constant pressure further down. Katie felt him panting further into her ear.  
He had just reached her waistband with the knife when he suddenly heard footsteps outside the door and straightened up. 

"Ah, we have a visitor. Very well. Then HE can watch. And then I will kill her little friend in front of her eyes and finish what Moriarty couldn't do. And then it's your turn" he said and turned his gaze to the door. 

Her eyes also went to the door and she panicked. She didn't want Sherlock to get hurt. She had to do something. And before she knew it, her foot landed with full force between his legs.  
Holden was surprised and staggered slightly. 

"What the --" was the only thing he could say before he fell to the ground, bent over.  
Katie thought she had put him out of action for the time being, but he quickly straightened up again. 

"YOU LITTLE BITCH!" he yelled now and threw himself on her. He had dropped the knife when he fell. Instead, he put his hands around her neck and now squeezed the air from her. Just when she thought it was over, the last breath escaping from her throat, the door flew open and the man was pulled away from her.

Sherlock had grabbed him and flung him to the floor. He beat him several times until he was half unconscious. Behind him, at gunpoint, Jack stormed into the room.  
He froze for a moment at the sight that appeared before him. Katie was tied up in the chair, red spots all over her shirt. Blood was running down her neck and there were traces of the fingers he had just used to strangle her. And Sherlock, who knelt down on the man and punched him in the face several times.

He quickly gathered and rushed to the two men. He pulled Sherlock off him and put the handcuffs on the man who was now lying there on the floor with a bloody face, jaws and nose smashed. Then he pulled him up to him and led him out of the room.

Katie, still tied to the chair, gasped for breath. Sherlock released her from her restraints and then pulled her into his arms. Her breathing gradually calmed down. After a few seconds, he felt her weight against his body become heavier and he noticed that she had fainted.  
Carefully and gently he carried her to the couch and put her down. He sat down at the other end and put her legs in his lap.

Jack came back in and told him that his colleagues had taken Holden Bennett away. He also asked if he should call an ambulance but Sherlock waved him off. He then said goodbye to him. Jack waved to thank him and then left the two of them alone.


	12. emotions?

It only took a few minutes for Katie to regain consciousness. When she opened her eyes, she saw Sherlock, who looked at her with a strange look. Was it fear or anxiety? She did not know.

"Sherlock, where is Holden?" she asked and tried to sit up.

"He's just been taken away. You don't need to worry any more. He won't hurt you anymore," he replied and helped her to sit up. Then he got up, only to come back a little later with a glass of water. 

She accepted it with thanks and emptied it in one go.  
"He is the executioner-killer and I was apparently to be his next victim," she continued. "He is also the man who had helped Moriarty and whom they were looking for but he knew nothing of my old identity.

Sherlock sat down beside her again. But he did not look at her.  
"I know. We saw pictures of the bodies and of you and of us both. I assumed that he was only targeting you to get to me but apparently you were just part of his prey scheme.  
Sherlock sighed and stroked back his falling curls.

"Katie, I didn't want to involve you in this and I didn't want you to be in any danger. I, um... I... " he stammered and turned to her.  
Tears were reflected in his eyes.

Katie interrupted him and looked him straight into his eyes. Then she bent over and gave him a hug. On his shoulders she murmured, "It's okay. It's not your fault."   
Her hands moved to his neck and gently stroked his hair.

Then she leaned back again but only so far that their faces were only a few centimetres apart. They looked deep into each other's eyes. She noticed that a tear had come loose and stroked it away with her thumb. She stayed a few seconds longer with her hand on his cheek and made gentle circles. Sherlock sat still and motionless the whole time. Then finally she let go of him. He watched her face closely. There was so much pain in her eyes, but also something like love. 

Before she could turn away, he had already grabbed her face and was about to put his lips on hers when she stopped him.

"Sherlock? What are you doing?"

Sherlock blinked several times before turning away from her mouth. Her face still in his hands.

"I'm, um... I wanted to kiss you?" It was more of a question. Confusion was written on his face.

Katie smiled slightly and took his hands off her face and put them on hers.

"No, Sherlock. You don't really want to do that. You think you have to do this now because you feel guilty. But it wasn't your fault. You know, a kiss is an intimate moment that you usually share with the person you love. And you do not love me. So you don't have to do this."

She slapped herself inside for what she just said. She wanted to kiss him so badly and actually he wanted to kiss her too.

She let go of his hands and stood up. She wanted to wash the strain and especially the - now already dried - blood off her body. She no longer heard what Sherlock said.

"And if it is so?" he now asked into an empty room.


	13. Goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I have now decided to upload the story completely. I think within the next few days it will be ready. And then I will be done with all this. I just wanted to write down a few thoughts and ideas from my head and I succeeded. I thank all the people who read my story and who liked it.
> 
> So and now the next chapters follow...

Katie woke up very early the next morning. She had not slept much. She kept thinking about yesterday. As soon as she closed her eyes, images of Holden came into her head, tying her to a chair and panting in her ear as he slowly "cut" her open with a knife. And then there was the situation with Sherlock, who wanted to kiss her. She could still slap herself for refusing and just leaving.  
Whether he was actually still there?, she wondered.

Katie swung her legs out of bed and walked quietly to the door. Carefully, she peered through the gap, only to see that he was nowhere to be seen.  
Sighing, she pushed the door open and stepped out. She was about to go into her bathroom and get ready for work when suddenly her front door opened. 

"Good morning"

It was Sherlock, in his hand a bag from the nearby baker. He was in a strangely good mood, which confused Katie a bit. She didn't know what to say and stood there staring at him with her mouth open.

Sherlock moved slowly in her direction. As he stood before her, he smiled.

"What? Did you think I was going to leave before I said goodbye?"

She still said nothing, instead she just nodded.  
Her reaction made him smile again. Then he put the bag down and prepared coffee.  
What was wrong with him today?

She shook her head briefly in disbelief. She couldn't believe that he was still here and was now standing in her kitchen preparing breakfast.  
It took a few minutes before she found her language again.

"When do you have to leave?" she asked afterwards.

Sherlock stopped briefly in his movements. He knew that he didn't really want to leave but he had to. He cleared his throat briefly.

"My taxi will be here in 40 minutes"

Katie thought she heard a hint of sadness in his words. Was he sad that he had to leave? No, that can't be.

"Oh, okay. Is everything okay? Is there anything else I can do for you or do you need anything else?"

He heard her words and suddenly thought of the conversation back in the lab with Molly when she noticed that he looked sad and asked him if he could use anything from her. And also about what he had asked and her reaction.

"No. I do not need anything. I really just wanted to thank you."

Sherlock put the cup on her table and then took his outside to her balcony. Katie followed him and sat in the empty chair opposite Sherlock. Before them, the sun slowly crossed the horizon and greeted the new day.  
"You have a nice view from here and Chicago isn't really all that bad. Anyway, there are exciting cases here. I can understand if you don't want to go back," he said, looking ahead and sipping his cup. 

Now Katie understood nothing more. What was wrong with him today? Was he making small talk here? But he hated it.

"That's right. You know, I love sitting out here early in the morning and watching the sunrise. It has something of a fresh start to it. No matter how yesterday went, with the first rays of the sun a completely new day begins and you have the chance to make it an unforgettable day".

Sherlock turned to her again. Her eyes glistened with the first rays of sunshine. She was so calm and seemed almost peaceful. As if she had forgotten yesterday and started today anew. She was beautiful.

'No. I have to focus. No distractions' he rebuked himself inside.

They sat silently next to each other for a while and watched the spectacle in the sky before them. It was not an unpleasant silence.  
The doorbell finally made them turn away. Sherlock stood up, ready to go and let her go. Katie followed him again and then opened the door for him.

"Goodbye, Sherlock. Take care!"  
Actually, she wanted to wrap herself around his neck and ask him not to leave her, but she knew he had an important mission that needed to be completed. 

"Goodbye, Katie. Thanks again for letting me stay with you. And I hope you'll be happy here," he said, leaning down to kiss her on the cheek.

Then he stepped out the door and walked down the corridor.  
Katie stood there and whispered, "Please don't go," turned and closed the door.

She was about to go to her couch when suddenly she heard a knock. Quickly she went back to her front door and opened it.

"I want your day to be unforgettable today," he said and pulled her towards him. Then he put his lips on hers and they merged in a short but passionate kiss.

A new ringing finally released them from each other. He smiled at her, turned around and disappeared as quickly as he had come.


	14. Return to London

It was now nearly 4 months after he had left her home for Serbia to destroy the last branches in Moriarty's network. After a few low blows he finally succeeded and was able to return home with full satisfaction.  
His brother had just freed him from the clutches of some Serbian killers and had explained to him that a terrorist attack was planned in London and that he had to return.

"I will join you in a few days. I have something to do first," he said after they arrived at the airport. The private plane was already standing by, waiting to take the detective back to London.

Mycroft rolled his eyes at his little brother's testimony.  
"She's not there any more"

Sherlock turned to him instantly and stared at him in horror.

"About a month later, after you had left her, little brother, she contacted me and asked for help in rebuilding her old life.

"And where is she now? Is she back in London?"

Mycroft sighed.  
"I don't know.

"Oh, come on, you always know everything!

"Well, she may be back in her old home town. She wanted to sort some things out."

Sherlock couldn't believe it. Katie had left Chicago and was now back in England. He had to find her. Well, first he had to find John and Lestrade and Molly and Mrs Hudson And then there was that case that Mycroft had told him about. But then he had to go to her. 

It took him a while to calm all the waves with his friends (well, actually it was only John) and save London from a terrorist attack.  
John and Molly were also engaged in the meantime. He was happy for both. Even for Molly. She deserved to be happy, especially after all she had done for him. John's fiancée Mary was acceptable and he liked her. Of course, he knew that this would change things between him and John and that they would solve cases together. But there was something that interested him even more. 

Sherlock knew that John had been in contact with Katie when she was in Chicago. Maybe even today? But he had to mention it casually, not that John would suspect. Good thing, John (after his initial annoyance) became curious after all and asked him about his last years.  
They were both sitting in his flat in Baker Street. Each in his armchair. It was almost like old times.  
Sherlock told them what he had planned with his brother and where he had been all this time. When he came to the point that he was in Chicago as well, John became very attentive.

"You were in Chicago? Did you know that Katie lives there? Did you see her?"  
Perfect. He went into it, but, wait, was he speaking in present tense?'

"Yes. There was someone Moriarty had infiltrated the FBI and as it turned out he was the wanted serial killer and Katie was to be one of his victims."

But before John could ask, he continued.

"We could save her. So she is alive. And, yes, she knew then that I was not dead."

John breathed deeply.  
"Good God. Well, it's a good thing you were there, then. Were you aware that I was still in contact with her for some time?"

"I knew. But what does a time mean?"

John became silent. His eyes fixed on his hands in his lap.  
"I haven't heard from her in about four months. I didn't think anything of it at first. Maybe she just had too much stress or something. But when I still didn't hear from her two months later, I started to worry. I knew that in the first few months after she found out about her stillborn baby, she was not well. I advised her to see a psychologist but she always decided against it. Then I thought she would get better with her new boyfriend Jack, but after I found out that they had split up, I thought maybe something had happened. I also tried to reach her several times, but the number was no longer in service. I'm quite worried that something might have happened to her or she might have hurt herself, Sherlock!

Tears sparkled in his eyes.

"She's all right. I think so, anyway. Mycroft told me she asked for his help to rebuild her old life.

John breathed a sigh of relief. It was only then that Sherlock realised what he'd said.

"Wait, what did you say? Her stillborn child?"  
Sherlock was stunned and looked at the man opposite in astonishment.

"You did not know? I suppose she must have met someone there and then lost it after she was pregnant. But, Sherlock, how did you know I was still in contact with her?"

Oh, John. Poor, stupid John. Mycroft had her under surveillance. Katie had never met anyone like that except Jack and it wasn't until a few months later. But that meant she was --'

"Sherlock? Are you all right? You suddenly look even paler than usual"

Shocked, he was torn from his thoughts by John.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I'm fine. To return to your question. She had told me."

He hoped he would leave it at that and not ask further questions. And he did.


	15. Molly

**St. Bart's laboratory**

Molly was just bending over the microscope to examine some fibres she had found on the body during the autopsy. Lestrade asked her to do a detailed examination, as this was in connection with a murder case.  
When she was suddenly interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Hello Molly"

Katie stood in the doorway and smiled at her.

It took Molly a short time to realise who was standing in front of her. She had changed. Her hair was longer and a slightly different colour but she couldn't forget that smile, that warm smile.

"Oh my God, Katie!" she screamed and ran frantically towards her to take her in her arms.  
"What are you doing here? I thought you were in Chicago?"

Now Katie laughed as she saw how joyfully Molly greeted her.  
"I was. But after hearing that Moriarty was dead and that I'd almost been killed by a serial killer, I decided to come back."

"Oh my God, Katie is this true? That's horrible. I'm sorry, but you're okay?"

Katie nodded.

"And does John already know you're here and do you know where you'll be living now? And --"

"Molly, slow down" laughed Katie.

"I'm sorry but I'm so happy to see you. I must say this is a very interesting month. First Sherlock returns from the dead and then you reappear. Oh, my God, you don't know about Sherlock, do you?"

Sherlock. The name made her heart jump in her chest. So he was able to complete his mission successfully.

"I had heard about his suicide on the news, yes. And when he resurfaced.  
She did not want to tell her yet that he had visited her in Chicago.

"Yes, that was one of those things. Quite exciting. But tell me, what are you doing here? Do you want to stay in London, or are you just passing through and going back to Leeds?"

"I've been there. I had some things to sort out and now I'm looking for a flat and a job. That's why I wanted to talk to you. But say, wouldn't you like to have lunch with me?"

"Very good idea. We can meet in half an hour at the bistro just around the corner. I need something else than this canteen food," she suggested, twisting her eyes playfully. 

Katie was glad that Molly was happy to see her and wasn't angry that she hadn't contacted her. She was sure that Molly could also help her find a job and would certainly put in a good word with her supervisor. Lost in thought, she was heading for the bistro that Molly had suggested when she was suddenly hit by the swinging open door.

"Oh my God, I'm sorry. I didn't see you" A beautiful blonde woman was bent over her. In her hands she was holding two cups.

"It's okay. Nothing happened. I'm fine. It's hard to push open a door and coordinate with two full hands" joked Katie and slowly stood up again.

The blonde woman smiled now too.  
"Yes, you're right. But without (she held the cups up) I wouldn't get through the day and my boss would drive me crazy."

Now both had to laugh. Then the woman apologised because her lunch break would soon be over and said goodbye to her.  
Katie looked at her for a moment and smiled. What a nice and lovely woman, she thought to herself.  
Then she entered the small bistro and started looking for a place to sit. She decided on a table further back, where you could talk undisturbed.

It didn't take long and Molly came in through the door. She briefly greeted the owner, apparently she often went out to eat here, ordered her usual food and then joined Katie.

As she took off her jacket and thick scarf, she spoke.  
"So what did you want to talk to me about?"

Katie took a deep breath.  
"So, as you know, I have a degree in scientific forensics from the Department of Forensic Psychiatry. However, as there are no vacancies in this area at the moment and I saw that you were looking for a lab assistant, I wanted to ask you if you could put in a good word with your boss? I have already submitted my application earlier".

Molly pondered for a moment. Then she smiled.  
"Of course I'll do it. It would be great if you and I could work together. And I could devote more time to my real work again. So, now that that's settled, tell me, how have you been the last few years, apart from running from some murderers?"

Molly and her jokes. But she liked her for it and that she didn't worry about it, even if her jokes were sometimes abysmally bad.

So Katie told her about her life in Chicago. That she had worked in a bar where she met Jack. That she helped him with cases from time to time and they fell in love but in the end it was all a lie.   
Molly listened carefully all the time, trying to comfort her at the right moments. Afterwards Katie wanted to know what Molly had been up to all these years and how things were going with her fiancé Tom. Molly loved her stories and raved about him all the time. Katie had to smile all the time, but it couldn't reach her eyes. She couldn't stop thinking about Sherlock. I wonder if he had already forgotten her.

At some point Molly changed the subject.

"What I wanted to ask you. How are you actually doing, after what happened, I mean in the first few months? We couldn't talk about it again then," Molly stammered.

Yes, Molly knew about it, too. She had talked to John about it after that message and Molly was also in the room. At first she was less enthusiastic but her loving and warm nature had helped her a lot.

"Molly. It's okay. It's not a taboo subject. I mean, I still think about it a lot and still feel a little guilty that I couldn't stop it but I'm okay. Thanks for asking."

"And does Sherlock know?"

Katie, who just took a sip of her water, now spat it across the table.  
"How did... how do you know about this?"

"Katie, I'm not stupid. I saw it on your face back at the airfield and the fact that Sherlock wasn't there confirmed my suspicions. Oh, and by the way, you owe me a new sofa" Molly replied warningly, but she still smiled.

Katie had lowered her eyes. Her cheeks were colouring.  
"Molly, I'm so sorry. I mean, you were so nice to me. You let me into your house and I knew how you felt about Sherlock back then and I stupid cow, do something like that! And of course, I'll pay you another one. That is, as soon as I get a job." 

Molly smiled lovingly and then reached for Katie's hand.

"Everything is okay. I am not angry with you and you are not a stupid cow. I've seen how he always looked at you and I knew that I'll never have a chance with him. Besides, I have Tom now!  
So are you gonna tell him? Does he know you're back?"

Katie was deeply touched by her nature. How could anyone be so sweet and understanding?

"No, I don't think he knows, and I want it to stay that way. I don't know how to tell him and besides, there's nothing there now. I mean, I don't have it anymore. So he's not committed to anything.   
And no, I haven't contacted him since I got back. But he will certainly know through his brother. I honestly don't know if I'm ready to see him yet." There was a brief pause.

"You should know that four months ago, Sherlock came to live with me for a few days. He was looking for one of Moriarty's networks and needed a hideout. He'd also saved me from this serial killer when it turned out to be the same man. But nothing happened. Well, nothing except this one kiss when he left. I haven't heard from him since."

Molly swallowed.  
"I understand but I think he's gonna want to know. You should tell him. He's changed."

Katie sighed.  
"I don't know, Molly. I'll think about it. But right now, I really need a place to live and a job. I can't stay in a hotel much longer."

"I‘ll take care of it. Don‘t worry about it. If I know anything, I‘ll get back to you. But, you know, if you get the job, you'll see more of Sherlock?!"

Katie hadn't thought about it yet but she needed the job and she wanted to work in a laboratory again after so long.

"I'll manage somehow. I mean, I'm gonna meet him sooner or later anyway.

Katie quickly gave her her new number and thanked her for her help and understanding. Then they said goodbye, as Molly had to go back.

Of course this was a lie. It was not okay. She was not ready to see him again. What would he say? Would he tell her about the time with her or this kiss goodbye? Probably not. He would probably have forgotten her by now. 

She thought about what Molly had told her. Sherlock's changed. He'd want to know. Would he really? There was really only one person who knew what Sherlock was really like. So she went to the person who knew Sherlock best and trusted him the most.


	16. John und Mary

It was now early afternoon when Katie entered the surgery. There was not much going on. She was just approaching the registration desk when she heard a familiar voice.

"Oh, hello. I guess you got away with some of our run-in after all, huh?"  
The blonde woman from before was sitting opposite her, smiling compassionately at her.

What a coincidence. Only a few hours ago she collided with the woman who was now sitting in front of her and took her name. But as Sherlock always said so beautifully, the universe is rarely so lazy.

"Hello. Yes, I'm feeling a slight pressure pain and dizziness. Perhaps a doctor should have a look at it."

"Okay. You're lucky, there's not much going on today. Dr Watson will be with you in a moment. What's your name?

Katie pondered for a moment. Should she use her old name, but then the element of surprise would be gone. Besides, she had already had a new name for two years, but thanks to Mycroft Holmes' help it was no longer necessary.

"Matthews" Katie said finally and smiled.

After they had sorted everything out, the woman asked Katie to sit down again for a moment. She did not have to wait long and was called a little later.

With slightly shaky knees she walked towards the treatment room. Would he be pleased or did he not want to see her at all after she had not contacted him?

John sat at his desk and made a note. He had not yet seen her.

"Ms. Matthews, I'll be right with you," he said, still looking at the papers.

"Hello John"

John stopped his activity abruptly after hearing her voice. He turned suddenly and froze when he saw who was now standing there in his treatment room.

"K...Katie?" he stuttered and stood up.

She smiled.  
"It's good to see you again." 

Now he came closer, looked at her briefly and then pulled her into an embrace.  
"I am happy to see you but what was going on? Why didn't you get back to me? Sherlock had told me that he had saved you from a serial killer. What happened? I was worried!"

Katie sighed again. What was wrong with her friends today?

"Oh, John, it's been a terrible few months. After I was nearly killed, I just didn't feel well any more. I was afraid he might find me again and I just wanted to get away. I changed my number and asked Mycroft Holmes for help to get back. I'm sorry I haven't got back to you" she sobbed.  
John held her closer and stroked her back reassuringly. They were interrupted when suddenly the woman from earlier came in.

"I still need... Oh, what happened? Is everything all right?" she asked slightly sceptically.

"Yes, of course Mary. Come in. I want you to meet someone. Mary, this is Katie. Katie, this is Mary, my fiancée."

So this blonde and pretty woman she'd met before was the person John was talking about at the time. 

"We've met before, John. This is the young woman I told you about. The one I had knocked down the door earlier" Mary replied, looking apologetically at Katie.   
"But it's a pleasure to meet you and I hope this doesn't worsen my first impression," she smiled and held out her hand.

Katie wiped the tears from her eyes before she took her hand and smiled as well.  
"Not at all. The joy is all mine"

John was pleased that the two women got along well.

"What do you say we all go out for dinner tonight? After all, I want to hear more from the woman who always spent her breaks on the phone with John," Mary asked.

Katie and John agreed and talked briefly about the meeting place and the time before Katie left the practice again.

John was right. Mary was nice and had her heart in the right place. She was looking forward to dinner and getting to know Mary better.


	17. confession

After she had left the practice, there were a good 2 hours left before the meeting. She drove back to her hotel, took a shower, changed her clothes and then went to the restaurant. Since it was a beautiful evening and the city was slowly being covered in Christmas lights, she decided to walk. She had to get to know the city again. It also allowed her to look for flats. 

Thank goodness, she had put a lot of time aside over the years and was mostly just working to collect overtime. Her boss was very sad to lose one of his most competent employees, but of course understood her decision. Jack had apparently informed him about the incident and for days she couldn't stop herself from being pitied by her colleagues and asking questions until she finally couldn't stand it any longer.

She felt empty after Sherlock's departure. She felt that something was missing and her homesickness became stronger again. After about a month she could no longer stand it and contacted Mycroft Holmes. She knew that Jack was in contact with him and after all he had done to her he owed her. He didn't even ask why and took care of everything. A few weeks later she received the information that everything was set in motion and she could leave soon.

After she had left Chicago and felt English soil under her feet again, she was first of all, how could it be otherwise, taken to Mycroft by his assistant in a black government car. The latter handed her all her papers and explained to her that her "erasure" could be successfully reversed. She thanked him and then drove on to her home town, to her old university. She needed some of her awards including her certificate of completion of studies and some work references. Then she drove on to her old area to say a final farewell to her house and her past.

And now she was here again, in London. In the city where everything somehow began for her. Where she met her friends and where she fell in love. And was looking for a suitable flat.

On her way to the restaurant, she found a few that appealed to her at first sight. She would take care of them tomorrow.   
Now she was on her way to a dinner with her boyfriend and his fiancée. She remembered that the last time she wanted to have dinner with John, she was almost run over. A cold shiver ran down her spine with these memories. But there was also something good about that evening. She had met Molly and found another friend. And she was grateful for that.

She arrived 5 minutes before the agreed time and waited for them outside the restaurant. This time nobody wanted to take her life.

Nervously she stepped from place to place. She casually noticed a few glances from the men going in and out. While working in the bar she had already noticed that she had a certain effect on men. But she did not see the one she wanted the way the other men did. She was just about to drift off in her thoughts again when John and Mary turned the corner.

John had reserved a table for them and they quickly found their place. After they had placed their order, they talked about the past and the future. They were only briefly interrupted when the waiter handed them their meal.  
Most of the time Katie wanted to know how John and Mary met and fell in love. John also told her that Sherlock had ruined the first attempt at his proposal with his sudden appearance and that he could have killed him as a result. He didn't, of course, but there was a bloody nose for him anyway. He was angry and disappointed that he had let him believe he was dead all these years. Then he told the story of how he was almost burned alive and Sherlock and Mary saved him. Since then, they have been talking things out and are best friends again. 

Then Mary wanted to know what her life was like in Chicago all those years. She only casually told about it and did not dare to tell John that Sherlock was with her during his death.   
At some point they came across her ex-boyfriend Jack. John wanted to know what had happened and whether he was the father of her unborn child. She told him the truth and that he was a collaborator of Mycroft, who had been playing her all along. She didn't answer his other question, instead she told them the same thing she told Molly.

Mary looked at them sympathetically all the time and reached out her hand in a gesture of comfort.

"Oh, Katie. I'm sorry about that. Did you at least have someone there to talk to about it?" 

Katie shook her head gently and lowered her eyes.  
"Well, John and Molly know..."

John, who had just shoved a piece of his steak in her mouth, interrupted her.  
"And Sherlock..."

Katie stared at him with big eyes. Every colour faded from her face.  
"How?... Where from?"

Again John chewed on a piece, only this time he decided to swallow it down for now.

"Well, after he told me about being with you briefly when he saved you from that guy, I assumed you might have talked about it too. I didn't know what the guy had done to you. And I got worried after I stopped hearing from you. I thought maybe something had happened that must have reminded you of it and maybe you had done something to yourself or something."

She didn't know what to say. Sherlock knew? She suddenly got sick to her stomach. She had to get out of here.

"Excuse me a moment," she said, got up from her chair and disappeared towards the toilets.

Mary had been watching her attentively the whole time and understood immediately. She also apologised to John and went after her.

Katie bent over one of the sinks and clawed at the sides. Tears were streaming down as Mary came in.

"Sherlock was the father, wasn't he? You were pregnant by him?" she said and moved closer to her. She put one hand on her shoulder.

"Yes," she sobbed, "but he was never meant to know. I did not want him to know. I feel so bad about it. I mean, it's my fault."

Should she tell her? Katie thought about it for a minute before she went on.

"You know, it was the third month in Chicago when I found out. The doctor said there was some risk. I was living in a short relationship at the time and when he heard that I was pregnant and by someone else from another guy, he changed. He was constantly angry and I was afraid that he might hurt me or my unborn child. So I took refuge in work. But at some point during my shift at the bar, I felt something was wrong. The next day I went straight to the doctor, who told me that I had lost my child. It's my fault! I should have left the guy and listened to the doctor! I wanted to. I wanted it so badly. After all, it was the only thing I had left of Sherlock, especially after hearing about his death. I know it's selfish, but I just... I just... “

Mary turned her towards her and pulled her into a reassuring embrace.

"You loved him, didn't you? And you still love him?"

Katie kept crying into her shoulder. She didn't answer, but Mary knew the answer to her question. 

"It's not your fault. You did it because you wanted to protect your child. But I think you should talk to Sherlock. He would want to know."

Again this sentence. Would he want to know? Would he even care?

After a short time Katie broke away from Mary again and wiped away her tears.

"Thank you" she smiled slightly. But like this morning with Molly, it didn't reach her eyes.

Mary looked at her pitifully and then helped her to fix her make-up.

"John will wonder what we've been doing here for so long." 

John. He didn't know it was Sherlock's child. Katie turned to Mary and asked her to keep it to herself and not to tell John. Mary looked at her with a slight surprise but understood. She nodded and pulled Katie out of the washrooms with her.

John sat in his seat and was slightly surprised at her reaction. But when he finally saw the two women coming before him, Mary held Katie in her arms, his face lit up.

"Is everything all right with you?" he now asked as Katie sat back down in her chair.

"What? Oh yes, I probably just couldn't quite take the chicken" and looked at him apologetically.

The rest of the evening was increasingly relaxed. Mary finally turned the spotlight on her wedding, for which Katie was very grateful. In just a few months it should be time. They also thought about a double wedding for a short time but as Molly and Tom could not agree on a date so far, they quickly dropped the idea.   
Of course they would also be very happy if Katie would come to the wedding as well.   
After some time they said goodbye to each other. Mary gave her her number and asked that if she needed someone to talk to, she should get in touch with her.   
They hugged each other goodbye and then disappeared in different directions.


	18. First reunion

It was 12 December when Katie met Sherlock for the first time again. 

Several weeks have passed since the dinner with John and Mary. And a lot had also happened in Katie's life. She finally moved out of the hotel and now lives in a chic flat with private roof access in Covent Garden. For her it was love at first sight. After countless unsuccessful visits to flats, she finally found what she had always been looking for. It was a rather plain flat in a building with 2 more floors. There was a long hallway that ended in the spacious living room. At the corridor were two more rooms and next to the living room was the kitchen. After that, along another shorter corridor, the bedroom followed. A big plus was certainly the own roof terrace, which she would arrange at her own discretion as soon as the weather would get better again.  
Yes, she felt very comfortable from the first moment and the rent was affordable. She simply could not help but say YES. Since then she has spent her free minutes getting settled in at home.

She was also lucky when it came to work. Molly had kept her word and a week later she received an invitation for an interview. The supervisors were immediately impressed by her and her work and welcomed her the following week as a new member of their team. Molly was beside herself with joy and John and Mary were also happy for her.  
She remained in close contact with Mary. She helped her with the wedding preparations or they met weekly for dinner. It wasn't long before she had really taken her to her heart. Every now and then she would ask her about her decision to marry Sherlock but after a few meetings she finally gave up.

Katie had somehow managed to avoid him in the last few weeks, i.e. she was so busy looking for a flat that she had no chance to meet him. Of course he knew long ago that she was back here. John would certainly have told him after her dinner.

Katie was just about to examine some fabric fibres that had been found on the victim during a murder investigation.  
It had been just under ten days since she had started here and was getting safer by the minute with the technical equipment there or the composition of the laboratory. She got on well with her other colleagues and was immediately integrated. This was almost certainly also due to Molly. In just under half an hour she would meet her and the others for lunch. 

After about two hours, the lunch lasted a little longer than expected, she returned to the laboratory.  
She was about to sit back at her microscope when she was suddenly interrupted by a voice from the back corner.

"You are avoiding me"

Katie turned around in horror and looked at the person who was now coming towards her from the corner.

"Jesus Christ, Sherlock. You scared me!"

Sherlock was now standing inches away from her, looking down at her.

"You've been back here for nearly a month. You've already met Molly, John and Mary too but for some reason you don't want to see me. And I wonder why?"

Katie took a deep breath in and then breathed out again. She knew that this day would come eventually. She wondered a little, but why only now. After all, he had known for a month that she was back and that she was pregnant. 

"No way Sherlock. I just haven't had time the last few weeks. Busy looking for a flat and finding work. You know what I mean? And anyway, why didn't you come to me until after a month," she said, looking at the slide in front of her.

Sherlock rolled his eyes. She could not see it. Apparently, she had no intention of telling him.

"Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?"

Katie stopped what she was doing and looked up. While she was talking, she stood up and packed up some of the files.  
"I wouldn't know what business this is of yours! Now, if you'll excuse me," she said briskly and walked towards the door.

Sherlock followed her and before she could reach the door, he was already in front of her, blocking her path. She looked at him in astonishment. Anger sparkled in his eyes.

"Because it was my child, damn it!" he shouted.

"What makes you think it was your child. I had an amusing relationship after our night. It could have been his. And now please let me get on with my work," she said in an almost calm tone and pushed herself past him.

But Sherlock let her go before she could open the door, he said quietly:  
"I wanted to come back to you, you know? Back when I had finished my mission and my brother wanted to bring me back, I wanted to come to you first".

Katie stood with her back to him and held the door handle in her hand. She heard what he said.

"Goodbye, Sherlock" she said afterwards and walked out of the room.

After that, she only saw him on occasion when he needed information from her or was doing his own research. During this time, she spent most of her time in her office doing paperwork. 

He had not tried to talk to her about it again. Instead, he decided to resign himself. When they talked to each other, it was usually only about evaluating different data and experiments. They felt the tension between them, but neither of them wanted to talk about it first. It didn't take long for Sherlock to return to his usual self without the humiliation he always inflicted on Molly. 

Her friends, of course, sensed that there was something between them and soon they couldn't stand the tension. It was now just before Christmas and John and Mary wanted to have a little Christmas party for their friends. 

Katie was busy in the lab as usual. It was very late now and she was alone. These were the moments when she could work best. And with music. She turned up the radio and sang along quietly. The radio was playing the song With or without you. She loved that song and at some point she became stronger and louder in her singing. After all, there was nobody there.

She just leaned over her rehearsals again and kept singing to herself. She didn't even notice that John came in the door. Only when the song ended did he speak.

"That sounded wonderful. You have a stunning voice, Katie"

Katie turned around in horror. Her cheeks turned colour.

"Oh, hello, John. I didn't hear you come in." 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to bother you. But seriously. Your singing is great. You should sing at our wedding!"

"Thanks but no thanks, I'd rather not." she replied slightly embarrassed.  
"What else can I do for you?"

John was a little disappointed. After all, he was serious about his proposal. He cleared his throat just before he came to his real reason for the visit.

"Mary and I are planning a small Christmas party for our friends at our house and we would like to invite you to join us. Will you come?"

A Christmas party for all her friends. Then Sherlock will certainly be there. 

"Thanks for the invitation but I'm not sure if I can make it. I've got to work."

"Oh, OK, but maybe afterwards? We'd really love to have you there," he asked, a little disappointed.

"I will think about it."

Afterwards he said goodbye to her and left the lab with a slight hint of disappointment. He beckoned a taxi and quickly wrote a note.

**She will not come. Work.**


	19. Christmas party

Today was the day of John and Mary's Christmas party. It was the 24th of December. John or Mary had not asked again since the first time if she would come.

Katie was just bending over some files and writing down her analysis and results. Most of her colleagues had left early and were probably on their way to their families. She could hardly concentrate. The paperwork was tiring, especially today. She also knew that it could wait until after the holidays. There was nothing in it that was in any kind of hurry.

In the meantime it was evening and the city was shining with Christmas lights. She loved Christmas and always loved to celebrate it with her loved ones earlier. And she had a chance to do it again. So she packed up her things, tidied up a bit and then walked out the door.

John had told her they were going to meet at 7. By now it was half an hour before 7. She would be late anyway. So she quickly drove home, showered and changed her clothes. She decided on a blue wool dress, including tights and long boots. She tied her hair together and put on light make-up.  
Then she went to the subway station. Now it was half past seven.

Happy activity and laughter filled the house when she arrived. Everyone had come. Mrs Hudson, Molly and her fiance, Greg and even Sherlock. Sherlock was playing a Christmas carol on his violin for his landlady.  
They'd decorated the place for Christmas. Warm light shone everywhere in the room. In the living room there was a festively decorated Christmas tree and a large table with all the delicacies on it. The windows were lit with fairy lights. A garland of fir trees was stretched over the door to the living room. It was festive but by no means exaggerated. 

It was now just before 8 when the doorbell rang. John and Mary looked at each other joyfully before he stepped to the door and opened it. Katie stood before it and smiled at him.

"I hope you'll still want me around?" 

John laughed and pulled her with him. He helped her out of her coat and hung it on the coat rack.

"I'm glad you made it after all. We're just having dinner. Come and sit down. I hope you brought an appetite," he said and led her to the table. She was placed between Greg and Mrs Hudson. Sitting opposite was Sherlock, who looked at her shyly and with a hint of sadness in his eyes. Or was it something else?

"Oh, yes and how! Hello to everyone and Merry Christmas" she replied afterwards and sat down in her chair. Then she turned to Greg.

"Oh, hello. I don't believe we've met? I'm Katie," she introduced herself to him and held out her hand.

"Greg, hello. Nice to meet you" he smiled.

Katie smiled and then turned to her hosts and thanked them for the invitation. During the meal, we mostly talked about trivial things. Katie and Greg spent most of the time talking about work and their plans for the holidays. She had told him that she had to work, but she wouldn't mind, as she no longer had any family to visit. Greg then said that he would spend the holidays working as well. He had divorced his wife earlier this year after she had cheated on him repeatedly. Then, at some point, he had got the courage to leave her. Katie looked at him sympathetically but Greg just smiled. It was probably better that way, he had said. Then he suggested that if they both stayed in London for the holidays, they could meet for dinner. Katie was just about to respond when a cough on the other side of the street upset her. Sherlock had overheard the conversation between the two of them and then choked on Greg's invitation to dinner.

Katie glanced briefly at the man opposite her. Greg had also noticed and glanced at him in annoyance.

"And Sherlock? What are you planning for the holidays? Solve a few new cases again?" he now asked.

"It depends on what comes up," he replied. His eyes on Katie.

Katie immediately shot the blood into the head. She turned away quickly and listened to the conversations of the others. 

After dinner, she offered to help clear the table, which Mary accepted with thanks. The others moved back into the living room while Sherlock played his violin again.

Mary took advantage of the opportunity while she was alone with Katie.

"And have you spoken to Sherlock yet?"

Katie sighed and rolled her eyes.  
"He came round to my lab a couple of weeks ago. Well, actually, he was more like stalking me."

"Oh, yes, I remember. John had told me that he had met Sherlock after that and he said he had never seen him like that before. He was kind of disturbed and sad. What had happened?"

"He was angry, he wouldn't let me go. And he told me that just before he was going back to London, he was going back to Chicago to see me.

Now she became curious.  
"And then what happened?" The excitement was hard to hide.

"And... I told him I was pregnant by someone else!"

Mary slapped her hands in front of her face and moaned. Molly just came in with her empty glass to fill it up again.

"Oh, did something happen?" she asked, slightly worried.

"Our dear Katie here, screwed up, Molly!" and pointed her hands at the person next to her.

Katie was confused and looked back and forth between the two women.  
"How screwed up?"

But Mary didn't answer. Instead, she looked at Molly with a look that said they had to do something.

"Katie, you know what, we're done cleaning up here now. Why don't you go back to the others?" she ordered and pushed her out of the kitchen decisively.

Katie was still visibly confused by the reaction of the two women, but let herself be led out of the room. There would be no point in discussing with them anyway.   
She went back into the living room but where was she to go? Greg and John had just been engrossed in a conversation. Mrs Hudson was talking to Tom and Sherlock, yes, Sherlock was leaning casually against the wall and cleaning his violin bow.   
Perhaps she should talk to him after all and try to ease this unpleasant tension between them again? After all, today is Christmas. At least she could compliment him on his violin playing to start the conversation.  
Katie sighed inwardly and then went to him. 

  
**Meanwhile in the kitchen with Molly and Mary**

"Molly, we have to do something. Nobody can stand this tension. Apparently there's something between the two of them, but I don't know what it is"

"I think so too. Katie had once told me that Sherlock had visited her in Chicago. He would have been completely different. He was polite, helpful and took care of her. And he had kissed her goodbye. And shortly after that she returned to London. She said she was very homesick at the time and would have missed us. But I think there was another reason!"

Mary's face lit up.  
"I knew it. She's in love and Sherlock obviously has feelings for her too! Only they're both too stubborn to realise it."

She laid her elbows on the table, hands on her face and sighed.  
"What can we do?"

Molly joined her.  
"I don't know. Obviously, both don't want to admit their feelings but the kiss clearly triggered something in them.

Suddenly Mary sat up and grinned, no, she was radiant.  
"Do you see what I see?" 

Molly did not understand, then looked in the direction Mary was looking and saw both of them talking. Then her eyes went up further and she saw it.   
There above the two of them Mary had hung up a mistletoe and they were standing right under it, not knowing it of course.  
She understood now why Mary was so happy, but should they really do this? She knew how Sherlock felt about all these traditions, and she didn't want Katie to be humiliated as she always was if she refused.   
But before she could tell Mary about her doubts, she had already stormed out of the kitchen.

"Now look who's standing under the mistletoe! You know what you have to do now. Tradition demands it," she exclaimed joyfully.

Everyone turned their heads in the direction of the two of them and grinned crookedly. John looked slightly confused at Mary and then at Sherlock. Instantly silence returned to the room.

Katie and Sherlock both looked up and then they saw it. Then he turned his gaze towards her. She didn't look at him and looked at her feet instead. For some reason, she didn't look excited.

Molly joined in too and stood with Mary.   
"Maybe this isn't such a good idea after all. We'd better not interfere" she whispered.

But Mary waved away.  
"Come on, Sherlock. It's Christmas and it's tradition. You don't want to break the tradition," she almost pleaded.

The eyes of the other guests were still on her. They were eagerly awaiting what would happen next. John knew that his friend didn't think much of such traditions and regret for Katie was spreading. But what he saw then made his faith drop completely. 

Katie swallowed when she noticed Sherlock coming closer. He stopped just before her face.  
"You know Mary won't give it a rest," he whispered so only she could hear and looked at her with a questioning look.

She thought about what he had said for a moment and knew he was right. Mary would not stop. Then she nodded tentatively. Sherlock smiled slightly and then put his lips on hers. Their mouths fitted together perfectly and when he realised Katie wasn't avoiding him, he intensified his kiss. He put both hands around her waist to pull her closer. She trembled all over her body.

Cries of astonishment rang out in the room and some clapped.   
´Was it really such an event that Sherlock Holmes kissed someone?` he asked himself and twisted his eyes inside. 

He detached himself from her and tried to deduce from her face what she was thinking at the moment and why she was trembling. But she looked down again. Her cheeks were wet and he recognized that they were tears. Why was she crying? Was he really such a bad kisser?  
He tried to analyse what it was like with his last kiss with her. But he didn't know about her subsequent reaction, because he had left immediately afterwards.

Molly saw Katie's cheeks glistening in the light. She knew this image only too well. She walked up to her as quickly as possible and stood in front of Katie. She didn't want the others to see her like that. She faked some excuse where she needed their help and pulled her out of the room.

Katie was grateful for Molly's quick help. She didn't know why she was crying but she was very uncomfortable if the other guests had seen it.

Molly pulled her into the bathroom and handed her a handkerchief. She said nothing but waited for her to calm down. She had been equally surprised at Sherlock. She assumed that he would say something derogatory and then leave her standing there in front of the others, but the kiss hadn't been expected. Mary then drew sharply and kept poking her in the side with her elbow. Her gaze was something like confirmation of her suspicions. But she had not expected Katie's reaction.   
Katie was glad that Molly was silent. She didn't want to talk about it and explain what was going on. She didn't know herself. Of course it was unexpected, especially after the last time, but the kiss was pleasant and obviously Sherlock had felt the same way. She had rather expected him to kiss her on the cheek, as he often did, and then turn away from her, but he kissed her, kissed her right and pulled her towards him. She had felt like she did when he came to her - in Chicago.   
But she also knew that there would never be a future for the two of them. She had always held on to this thought.   
She wiped the tears from her face and tried to fix her make-up. Then she turned to Molly.

"Maybe it's better if I leave now. It's way too late anyway and I have to work in the morning. 

That was a lie. 

"You lie. Tomorrow nobody will work for us. It's Christmas. And come on, don't let it spoil your evening. Nobody noticed but me. So let's go back inside and have a nice evening," she said and took her hand to pull her out of the room.

It was too quick before Katie could say anything back. When they got back to the living room, she saw that Molly was right. No one seemed to have noticed anything. Everyone was again engrossed in conversation and no one looked at her with a pitiful look.  
She looked around the room and noticed that someone was missing. Sherlock was no longer there.

Mary came to the two of them with punch in her hands. She handed one each to the women. As if she noticed Katie's questioning look, she finally said:  
"He had to go. Any case and then he was gone," she said, waving her hands absently in the air. 

Katie stood there, gazing absent-mindedly into the room and breathing deeply. A sense of relief spread through the room but there was another feeling. Her chest tightened and she felt a stabbing pain in her heart. She was disappointed. Disappointed that he had left. But Molly was right. It was Christmas. She loved it and didn't want it to spoil her evening.


	20. Stay with me

It was now shortly after ten o'clock when the guests slowly started their way home. Katie offered to accompany Mrs Hudson home. She did not want to let the elderly lady go alone. She also liked her and enjoyed talking to her. The elderly lady accepted her offer with thanks and a little later they were already in a taxi to Baker Street. 

When they arrived, Katie accompanied them to their front door. The older lady had had a bit too much punsch. Mrs Hudson thanked her again and then said goodbye.   
Katie was just leaving the building when she heard a strange melody from above. She couldn't explain why, but she turned on her heel and followed the melody upwards.

At the top she recognised the melody. Sherlock had played it before. Back when she came out of the hospital. She crept quietly to the door and opened it carefully.   
And there, at the window with the violin in his hand, he stood and played that sad melody again.   
She stepped a little closer when a creaking of the floorboard interrupted him and he turned to her.  
He looked confused and there was sadness in his eyes. Could it be that Sherlock was sad? But why?

He said nothing, he just looked at her.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt. I was just...just taking Mrs Hudson home," she said in a shaky voice.

"Obviously," he said. His voice was cool.

"Um, is everything all right? I mean, are you all right? I've heard that tune from you before and it sounds sad. Are you okay?"   
She didn't know why she was still standing here and tried to ask him about his feelings.

"Everything is fine" he replied.  
  
What was wrong with him? Why was he so cool? He liked her, very much. He had kissed her. Several times. Put all his feelings into it to show her how he felt. And she had reciprocated. Always. And now she was here. obviously wanted to talk to him. And he was so distant and cold to her. Sure, he had been hurt, after her reaction from the kiss before. But after a short time to think about it, he understood why. He remembered the words she spoke to him just before he wanted to kiss her. That a kiss meant something to her. That you share a kiss with someone you love. And she assumed he didn't feel that way.   
Secretly, though, he was only afraid. He did not know how to deal with these feelings and how to reveal them.   
And he did not know if she felt the same way. But when she kissed him back then, it was clear to him. But it could never go well. She lived in Chicago and he in London. He never had a thing for romantic entanglements or relationships. Especially no long-distance relationships. But now she was here and standing in his flat. 

Before he could say anything else, she turned around and whispered   
"Okay. Then goodbye."   
She sounded sad. He knew he shouldn't let her go and before he knew it, the words were already out of his mouth.

"Don't go". It was more of a whisper and he doubted that she had heard him. 

But Katie stopped suddenly and then turned back to him. She carefully approached and then closed the door. Then she stood in front of him, looked deep into his eyes and finally put her arms around him. Her head rested on his chest. She didn't know why she was doing this but it seemed right at that moment. And it felt right. She noticed that he was trembling and slightly stiffened. His heart seemed to almost jump out of his chest. She gently stroked his back and he slowly relaxed. Then he also put his arms around her and held her close to him.

They stood there for what felt like an eternity. Each in the arms of the other. No one spoke a word. And neither of them made any attempt to ever end this. But at some point, Katie broke away from him again and brought some distance between them. She looked into his face and could see a hint of disappointment. Then she smiled, reached for his hand and led him into the bedroom. She gently pushed him onto the bed, took off her coat and then lay down beside him. Then she pulled him closer to her. His head rested on her chest and gently stroked his head, soothing him. Still nobody said anything. It was so strange but still very pleasant. They simply enjoyed the closeness of the other and so they fell asleep at some point.

Sherlock was the first to wake up and realise what had happened yesterday. He smiled at the thought of it. His smile intensified when he saw that she was still lying next to him and now snuggled up close to him. Her head now rested on his chest and her arm lay across his stomach. He held her tight and then closed his eyes again. He wanted this moment to never end.

When Katie woke up, she realised he was still there. He had turned away from her but she could still feel his warmth. She still didn't know why she had done this yesterday but it seemed to be just what he needed. He was hurt and he wanted her to stay with him. She didn't really want to stay overnight but his closeness and the warmth she could feel inside changed her plans. But now she was no longer sure. What would happen when he woke up? Would he return to his original self and maybe chase her out of bed? Would he shout at her because she had taken him by surprise? She didn't know and that scared her. 

Slowly and carefully she rose from the bed. She wanted to make sure he wouldn't wake up. Then she took her coat off the floor and quietly opened the door. She looked once more at the sleeping body lying there contentedly and calmly on the bed and then slowly pushed herself out the door. 

Katie was just about to step out the door and into the street when the door on the lower floor opened and a cheerful older lady stepped out.

"Oh good morning dear. Were you looking for me?" 

Katie smiled and nodded. She didn't want her to find out she'd been there all night.

"Yes... Well, I wanted to ask her if you'd like to have some breakfast before you go?"

The older lady smiled and nodded. Then she picked up her jacket and went out the door with Katie and into the shop next door. 

Sherlock noticed that Katie had sneaked out of his bed carefully. He was awake, of course, and was now a little nostalgic. He sighed and then slurped into the bathroom. He saw that he was still wearing his dressing gown. After he had showered and shaved, he went into the kitchen to make coffee. Then he saw that a note was hanging on the kitchen table, pinned to his microscope.  
  
**Merry Christmas ;)**  
 **+0442045770550**  
 **Katie**

He smiled and then put the note in the pocket of his dressing gown. This was clearly his best Christmas present since he was 8 years old and had received his first chemistry set. He also had to admit to himself that he hoped it wasn't a one-off. 


	21. New Years Eve

It was now the last day of the year. Today was New Year's Eve. Sherlock had often met Katie in the laboratory. The previous tension between them had been resolved by that evening.   
Yet there was now a strange attraction between them. An electrifying voltage. Nothing had happened since the evening she stayed with him. Every now and then, while they were working together, they threw longing looks at each other or smiled at each other. But nobody wanted to ruin these moments by talking about this evening and their obvious feelings for each other.

Even their friends noticed that this tension had disappeared and they understood each other better again. They noticed it above all in the fact that Sherlock became more sociable in his dealings with others. He was almost nice. 

Katie was just on her way to the canteen for a small dinner. She had put in a longer shift today, as she wanted to finish her tasks before the end of the year. Besides, she had no plans for New Year's Eve anyway. John and Mary were visiting his sister. Greg spent the turn of the year out of town and Molly was with her fiancé's family. And most of her colleagues had holidays between the holidays and New Year.

It was generally very quiet. She was the only one in her department who worked during the holidays. But she didn't have any other commitments either, and work always distracted her from the fact that she no longer had a family to celebrate with.

Now she sat alone at a table in the hospital canteen staring at the food in front of her. She tried to decipher what was on her plate. It was a funny-looking porridge that was supposed to be chicken fricassee. It was clearly too much. She could not bring herself to choke it down. Disgusted, she pushed the plate away from her.  
She was about to get up and get a little snack from the nearby vending machine when suddenly someone put a bag in front of her. As she looked up, she saw Sherlock's face. He had brought her a portion of fish and chips. Obviously he wanted something from her again.

"Hello, Sherlock. What can I do for you?" she asked with a played eye roll but laughed at him.

But Sherlock replied nothing. He seemed somewhat embarrassed and stroked his curls with his hand.

"Uh, actually with nothing. I just thought that this might taste better than THAT," he said dismissively, casting a derogatory glance at the funny-looking porridge.

"Oh. Well, thank you very much then. Would you like to join me or do you have other plans for the evening?"

"No, I have no plans. What's so special about New Year's Eve? It's a day like any other. Why celebrate the end of the old year? In the end, it only serves to make people get drunk and indulge their carnal desires on New Year's Eve because of their sentimentality," he said in an appreciative tone and took a seat in the chair opposite her.

"I agree with you there. Although I used to enjoy partying with my brother," she replied in a melancholy tone.   
"We used to sneak up to the roof of the school building. We always had a blanket and a small basket of drinks with us and watched the fireworks. For the countdown, we held each other by the hands and with every rocket that lit up the sky, we expressed our wishes for the New Year. And it was always the same wish we both had. We never wanted to be apart. It became a real tradition for us until..."  
Katie's gaze turned downwards and she felt sadness rise again, thinking of her brother.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm telling you this" Now it was her turn to be embarrassed.

He said nothing. Instead, he grabbed some chips and shoved them in her mouth. 

They ate silently for a while until Katie had to go back to the lab. She thanked him again for the food and wished him a nice last evening this year. Then she disappeared from the big glass door, out of his field of vision.

It was now barely half an hour until midnight. Katie had managed to finish her work and began to tidy up the laboratory. She would go straight home and watch the fireworks on her roof terrace for a while, before she would sit on the couch with a glass of wine and watch the New Year's programme on TV, only to fall asleep shortly afterwards anyway.

She turned off the light and stepped out of the door, when suddenly a buzzing of her mobile phone interrupted her movement.

**St. Bart's roof. SH**

What was he up to now? She rolled her eyes but was also curious. So she followed the long corridor to the lift. At the top, she opened the door that should lead to the roof.  
She stepped out, the lights of the city shining only enough to make out slight contours. 

"Sherlock?" she shouted slightly frightened.

She suddenly noticed a hand on her back, which she pushed forward carefully but firmly. Her eyes slowly got used to the darkness and when she could see where he was pushing her, she froze.

There on the floor was a large blanket with some pillows spread out. Next to it stood a basket. Sherlock had copied exactly what she had told him before.  
She was instantly speechless. Tears came to her eyes again. But this time they were tears of joy. She was touched by the fact that he was obviously taking care of her. She turned to him and beamed. Then she gave him a hug.

A short time later they separated again. Katie sat down on the blanket and told him to do the same. He did. 

Ten minutes to midnight.   
The rockets were already flying towards the sky but the two of them were not speaking. They were now lying next to each other, looking at the stars. When the countdown began (they heard it from a flat across the street) Katie reached for his hand as if automatically and squeezed it lightly. He let it happen. Her gaze was still fixed on the sky. Sherlock turned to face her and as the New Year began he whispered softly to her.  
"Happy New Year, Katie"

Now she turned her head to him as well and smiled at him lovingly.  
"Happy New Year, Sherlock" she whispered as well.

Then he slowly leaned over to her.   
At that moment Katie held her breath. Excitement spread. It was actually a tradition to kiss your loved ones for New Year. But would he do this? Sherlock wasn't very fond of such traditions.   
He slowly approached her face and Katie suddenly felt a tingling sensation all over her body. He paused just before her face. He seemed to be superior.   
Then he turned to the side and gave her a short and tender kiss on the cheek.

Then he turned back again. Her hands still in each other's.  
"Sherlock? What did you do that for anyway?" she asked at one point.

"Well I think that's what you do for your friends when they're not doing so well, don't you? And you were kind of, well, not cheerful today."

Friends. So they were just friends. She felt a twinge in her heart when she heard that word. It hurt to think of him seeing her as just a friend. He seemed to notice her gloomy mood and looked at her with an expression of confusion. But Katie smiled softly at him and then turned her head back to the sky. Her hand had released her and she was now resting on her stomach.  
The rockets continued to illuminate the London night sky. In the flat across the street they sang, laughed and greeted the New Year.

At some point Katie broke the silence between them.   
"And Sherlock, do you have any New Year's wishes?"

He turned to her and answered:  
"Just one. Tell me the truth about then."

He spoke very softly but she could hear it. She turned to him. In her eyes lay horror and a trace of melancholy.  
She thought about what he had said before. He deserved the truth and she felt quite stupid not to have told him before. He only saw her as a friend and she had nothing more to lose.   
She sighed inwardly, sat up and then began to tell. Her face looked down at the floor in front of her. Her knees bent, her arms wrapped around her

"You know, you were right. I was not pregnant by anyone else. It was your child.   
I found out about three months pregnant. It was going to be a girl.   
Yeah, and then a few weeks later, I wasn't.   
I was trying to protect my child from my aggressive ex-boyfriend and was running away to work around the clock. I probably put myself and the child under too much stress that she could not survive. I feel so guilty about this and I couldn't tell you the truth. I was afraid you would never want to see me again!" She gave a deep sigh.  
"But to be honest, I feel kind of ridiculous now, having kept it from you for so long. You are probably relieved not to be a father, and even more so because it was a chance night with just one friend! The word "friend" was spat out by her. 

Did he hear a hint of sarcasm? He wondered why and why this sudden change of mood? Had he said something wrong?   
Sherlock was at a loss. He didn't know much about these things and feelings. All his life he had built a wall around himself.   
But in recent years, that wall had begun to crumble. The first time was when he met John. John who always stood by him, no matter how mean he sometimes was to him and what he did to him. Then, when Molly, who helped him with his death without asking why, no matter how often he had humiliated her. And finally his wall continues to crumble whenever he is with HER and she smiles at him or touches him accidentally. He now also sat up and looked into the distance of the city.

"You are right about one thing. I am relieved. I just don't see myself in the role of a father and I don't think I could ever be. But our night together was not by chance. I wanted it"

There was a short break.

"You must know that I had feelings for you then, such romantic feelings. And I was afraid because of that." 

Katie didn't know how to respond. He was in love with her. Her heart leapt a little at the thought, but sank again as soon as she thought about what he had said before. She stood up and straightened her clothes.

"Well, I think it's time to go. I still have a long way to go home. Thanks for all this" and rambled her arm across the ceiling. 

Sherlock also stood up. He seemed surprised at her sudden departure.  
"Then let me at least take you home. It's getting late!"

"Sherlock, you don't have to do this. I'll be fine." Then she saw the look in his eyes. He looked disappointed. She didn't want to start another fight between them, either. She was glad that things had just relaxed a bit. She breathed out deeply.  
"But I think it might be better if you came with me."

Sherlock packed her things and then followed her off the roof and out of the building. At the bottom of the street, you decided to walk. The streets were crowded and it would take ages to get a taxi through. They walked along silently the whole time. No one dared to say anything or did not know.  
After about 35 minutes they came to a halt at their flat. Sherlock accompanied them up the few steps.  
At her front door, she put the key in the lock and turned back to him again.

"Well, thank you very much for the evening and the company. I wish you a good night, Sherlock"

She was nervous and nested her fingers on her clothes. Then she bent up to him and gave them a quick kiss on the cheek. She was just about to step through the door into the house when he grabbed her wrist and turned her back towards him. Katie was confused and looked at him questioningly.

"You are wrong. I would never want not to see you again. And honestly, in the two years I was away, the only thing that kept me going was the thought of you."  
He smiled slightly and then let go of her wrist. Then he turned around and followed the stairs down to the pavement. 

Katie stood there for a while and stared at him. This man was a mystery to her and she couldn't explain his behaviour. On the one hand, he called her just a friend and in other moments, he did or said something like that.

She shook her head. She didn't want to think about it anymore today and then ran up the stairs to her flat.


	22. New Detective

It had now been 3 days since their evening together on the roof. She had not heard from Sherlock since then. Katie spent most of New Year's Day wallowing in self-pity. He had told her that he was in love with her. Back then, before she had to go to Chicago.   
But now, now they were just friends. Friends? She thought about that word. Were they really friends? Do friends do this for each other? She was at a loss. But she knew that SHE wanted more than friendship. But it was to remain one-sided. It made her sick and her heart ached. She wondered how it could have come to this. She had tried all her life to keep such feelings away so as not to get hurt. Sure, she was not as cold as Sherlock Holmes but she had always been careful not to let anyone into her heart. Until HE entered her life. She had let him in and she ended up getting hurt. She just didn't want to feel that way anymore.

Then she thought about how Molly had always felt. Her love was unrequited too and now? Now she was happy and even engaged. Maybe she should give it a try. Maybe she would meet someone here in London who would make her forget the detective and maybe it would be her husband for life. 

She wanted it to stop. So she decided to make a resolution for this year after all. No more Sherlock Holmes! Well at least in connection with her heart. 

Satisfied and determined to achieve her goal, she put aside the numerous empty ice cream packs, drank the last sip of wine from her glass and went to bed.  
Tomorrow she would be working again and what is the best way to distract herself with a broken heart?! With work, of course.

Happy and cheerful she went to her workplace the next morning. She had decided to start a new life without the detective and was highly motivated to make it. Her colleagues were not to return to work until the following day. She was completely alone in the laboratory. Molly would probably work down in the morgue. She would pay her a visit later. To encourage her good mood, she turned up the radio and sang quietly to herself while analysing some samples that had been left over from the holidays.

After a few minutes the laboratory door opened and Greg and a tall young man next to him entered. He had brown hair and brown eyes. He looked good, he had to admit it to himself. Katie smiled as she saw the Detective Inspector.

"Good morning. Happy New Year to you. I hope you've had a good start?"

"Good morning, Katie. Thank you very much. I wish you the same. Well, it was more like a very bad headache," he said somewhat embarrassed and stroked his head with his hand.   
"And you? What did you do New Year's Eve?"

"Ah, yes I see" she said and laughed.  
"Nothing special." She didn't say anything about her "date" with Sherlock. She wanted to put all her thoughts of him out of her head. Then from the DI, she looked at the man next to him and then back again.

"Oh, yeah, right. Katie, this is our new Detective Constable. Mr. David Reid- Mr. Reid, this is Ms. Katie Wilson. She works here in the lab in the forensics department. 

Katie took off her gloves, walked up to him, reached out.   
"Pleased to meet you. So you'll be assisting Scotland Yard now?"

Mr Reid took her hand with thanks and smiled at her.

"Thank you. Yes, I hope to, once I'm settled in here. I only moved to London a week ago and I'm not yet so familiar with it.

"Oh. I've only been back here for a few months, too, and I need to get to know the city again. If you feel like it, we can explore the city together?" 

"Thank you. I would like that very much. Perhaps we could start with dinner?" he asked cautiously.

"I'd love to. I get off at 5 pm," she replied and winked at him. 

What was wrong with her? Was she flirting with the new detective?

Greg looked back and forth between the two of them the whole time and twisted his eyes in a playful way. Not even 5 minutes here and already he has a date' he sighed inwardly.

"Okay, I hate to interrupt you guys but we're actually here on another matter", Greg interrupted the two.

Katie looked from David to Greg.  
"What's up Detective Inspector?"

He told her that Molly was going to have a body on the table this morning, probably a murder by poison. You need all the substances that can be taken from the body. There is a suspicion of a poison, which can only be detected for 10-14h and therefore it has to be done quickly.

Katie nodded and promised to get to work immediately. Then she said goodbye to both of them, smiled at David again and replied to Greg that she would get back to you as soon as she had found something.

For the next few hours she spent thinking about what had happened this morning. She didn't really know what was going on with her. She had quickly agreed to a date with the new Detective Constable but she wanted to forget about Sherlock. And Mr Reid was nice and extremely attractive, she thought. She was looking forward to her dinner with him and yes, she was sure she could forget the consulting detective. 

She met Molly for lunch in the canteen. They talked about what their holidays and New Year's Eve were like. Molly told her that they had finally agreed on a date for their wedding. It will be September 1st and they want to have the ceremony at his parents' country estate. Then at some point Molly told her about her visit to the morgue this morning.

"Have you met the new Detective Constable yet? He came to see me this morning with Greg and I must say he looks very good" she grinned slightly.

"Yes. He also came by my place with Greg and asked me to process the samples you sent me earlier. And yes, he's really handsome and I've arranged to meet him today" Katie smiled.

Molly choked briefly on her drink before she found her words again.  
"You did what?" she asked incredulously.

"I'm having dinner with him tonight."

"Wow. I never thought I'd see that. Wait, what about Sherlock?" 

"What about him?" She was confused, but upset.

"Well, I thought that cos you were kissing at Christmas..." She faltered.

"There's nothing. We're just friends. And besides, that's what you all wanted. That stupid mistletoe tradition!" she hissed.  
She felt the word "friends" sting her again.

"Yes, but --"

Katie interrupted them. She was angry.  
"But nothing! We are friends and nothing more or less. And I am going out with Mr Reid tonight! Now, could we please change the subject!"

Molly lowered her eyes in embarrassment and gave a deep sigh.  
"I'm sorry. I did not mean to offend you. I'm happy for you, of course, and I hope you have a lovely evening."

Katie smiled a little. Her initial anger was gone.

After the two had finished their lunch, the two of them went their separate ways. Katie finally had to continue to evaluate the samples. Greg was expecting her as soon as possible. It didn't take long for Katie to filter out the deadly substance.

She quickly wrote him a message.

**It was a ricin intoxication**   
**Lily-of-the-valley**   
**Katie**

Afterwards she continued her work from this morning. It was now 3 pm. She was done with her analysis. So she packed her things and went home. She wanted to take a quick shower and change into something more appropriate for tonight before she went back to the lab to wait for Mr Reid.

At 5pm sharp, he stood at the lab door, leaning casually to the side and smiling at her.  
Katie took him to the changing rooms, where she swapped her gown for her coat and picked up her bag. They were about to leave the building together when Sherlock crossed her path.

"Did you --"

"Hello Sherlock, the evaluations are on my desk in the laboratory" she cut him off in his word and then dragged her companion with her.

Sherlock looked astonished as he looked at the two of them and only casually overheard what this man said.

"Was it this Sherlock Holmes? that consultant detective who helps out at Scotland Yard now and again?"

Then he turned around and went up to the laboratory to get the records.

He wondered who this guy was and what he wanted with Katie. Yes, he had told her that he considered them friends but secretly he had to admit to himself that it was a lie. His feelings had never really stopped. Since he was with her in Chicago, they stopped and became stronger. But he was never really sure with her whether she would feel the same. Once she was so distant from him and then again so empathetic and flirting with him. Not that he knew what that meant but he accepted it because he always watched the men when they talked to her.   
After all, they almost had a child together, too. With this thought a strange feeling came over him. But not necessarily in the unpleasant way. He also knew that he seemed to have hurt her somehow that New Year's Eve, but he couldn't say why. And now she threw herself at the first person she met. He didn't like it and he had to find out who that was.   
He could only think of one person who could answer his question. So he stormed out of the lab and down to the morgue. 

He entered with verve and immediately began to speak.

"Who was that with Katie earlier?"

Molly was bending over a body lying in front of her on the autopsy table. With the scalpel in her hand and the screen in front of her face, she looked up.

"Sherlock, hello. Who are you talking about?" and pulled the privacy screen down.

"Well, tall, male, brown hair, brown eyes, brown suit." 

"Ah, you mean Mr Reid. He's the new Detective Constable. Greg came by with him today to introduce him."

"And what does he want with her?"

Molly sighed and rolled her eyes.  
"They're having dinner."

"Dinner" he whispered so softly, she couldn't hear. So it's a date?

Sherlock turned on his heels and stormed out of the mortuary again. She had a date and it was with a man she just met today. But she wasn't really the type. Or was she? Had he now lost her forever? An unpleasant pulling sensation was spreading in him.   
He knew that he needed more information.


	23. Sherlock and emotions?!

It had been two weeks since he had seen Katie with this new detective. During that time he had seen her often in the lab. The tension he had expected after New Year's Eve never came up. She was cheerful almost every day, smiled to him every now and then and did some work for him without contradiction. She was happy.   
And he could not bear it. So much happiness and these feelings made him sick and even more so because he knew it wasn't because of him. He did not want to feel like that. He had to rebuild his wall and decided to stay away from it for the time being. After all, he still had Molly for important analyses.

Sherlock had just arrived at the rather inconspicuous house, situated in a suburb of London, when he climbed down the stairs and finally rang the bell. It was already evening and he knew that they were at home.  
A short time later a smaller blond man opened the door and looked at the CD questioningly.

"Sherlock? Has something happened?"

"Hello, John. I need to speak to Mary. Is she in?"  
And as if she was standing by the door, she came over.

"Sherlock? What's going on?" And she invited him in.

He followed her into the living room and then sat down on the couch. Mary pointed John out to leave the room with a look.

"So Sherlock, what's happened?" she asked and sat down next to him.

"It... uh... it's about Katie," he said calmly.

Mary slapped her hands in front of her face.  
"Oh, my God, I knew it! You love her."

Sherlock looked at her with eyes wide open. Oh, man, she knew it. Of course she knew. He must have known she'd figure it out so fast.  
"Mary, don't be silly. Me and love. Well, no, not really."

Mary looked at him sceptically and sighed.   
"Oh, Sherlock, what is it, then?"

He wiped his hands across his face.  
"It's just that she's seeing this new Detective Constable and I don't think he's right for her."

"But you are." It was less a question than a statement.

"No...Possibly... I, um... I don't know, Mary. And I don't know if she feels the same way. I mean, after new year's eve."

Mary expelled air vociferously.  
"So you did!," she cried triumphantly. "But wait, what was New Year's Eve?" she asked curiously.

Sherlock rolled his eyes and continued in a casual tone.  
"Oh, nothing more. We were just sitting together on the roof looking at the rockets. At some point she asked me why I was doing this and I answered that this was something you do for friends after all. After that she was different somehow and now she's seeing this Detective Reid and seems happy."

"Oh, Sherlock. She's only seeing this Detective because you hurt her. She loves you. And you should tell her!"

Sherlock looked at Mary with disbelief. Was she right? Did Katie have such feelings for him and had he hurt her because he considered them friends?   
"Er, and what, exactly, should I tell her?"

"That you love her, you idiot!"  
Startled, the two of them now turned in the direction from which the voice came.   
It was John who now moved towards them. And when he already knew what Sherlock was about to say next, he went on.

"Sherlock. You and I both know only too well that I'm the romantic here and I know these things better than you." He winked at Mary, then turned back to his best friend.  
"And I can also see that you feel something for Katie. Admittedly, I didn't really realise it until Christmas. So go and tell her, damn it, before it's too late!"

John was right. He did feel something for her. But was it love? After all, he had no idea what something like that felt like. And besides, did he want to tell her? Should he really get involved and let romantic entanglements into his life? He suddenly noticed a great uncertainty rising within himself and did not know how this conversation should continue. He had to end this as soon as possible.

"John, as you know, feelings and something like love are not for me.  
And honestly, this was a stupid idea. Just forget it," he said and got up from the couch.

Mary was just about to call after him, but by then he was already out the door.

He walked the streets for a while, thinking about what Mary had told him. She loves you! At that thought, that comforting feeling spread through his body again and a smile adorned his face. But it vanished as soon as he thought that she was now more involved with this Detective Reid. And she really seemed to be happy these last few weeks. But did he really want to destroy her happiness because of that? After all, he had hurt her often enough already. And besides, he was not a person for something like feelings and relationships.   
At some point he finally came to the conclusion that it was too late anyway. He had lost. And he had to find his way back to his former ME to get along with it. No more feelings, no more thoughts about her and no more desire to be close to her. After all, he was Sherlock Holmes, who thought feelings were a chemical defect on the losing side. And he was not a loser.


	24. Peter

Katie stood in front of her wardrobe and was desperate. Today she would go with David to a very chic restaurant in London. She didn't know how he had managed to get a table there but she was excited and looking forward to her evening. To the day they were a couple for 3 months today.

She remembered her first date very well.   
David took her to a restaurant called _Andy's Greek Taverna_. She had told him that she had never eaten Greek food in her life. He was slightly surprised but found her excitement sweet. They sat there until the end and just talked. He told her that he was from Bradford and had then moved to Leeds to study criminology. They discovered that they must have studied at the same university but had never met. He was 3 years older than her and was probably finishing his studies when she enrolled. And that he then lived in Missouri for several years after his studies. After they had to leave the restaurant, they walked along the Thames for a while. It was already after midnight and she would not normally walk around the city at this time but she felt safe with him. The last time she had felt that way was when she was near a certain consulting detective.   
She thought about his face when he first saw her and David together. That thought made her smile. He was confused and his eyes showed an expression of jealousy. But that was in the past, she decided.

In the weeks that followed, she had met him a few more times in the laboratory, where he asked her for some analyses in his typical Sherlock manner. And then at some point she didn't. But she did not mind. Well, she had stopped worrying about it. She was happy and she liked David.

Her friends had already met him too. Molly already knew him through Greg and then saw him more and more often in the company of him or Katie. She was immediately thrilled and happy for her friend. John and Mary met her once in the same restaurant. The two men got on well right away and after Mary's initial scepticism, they invited the couple to join them at their table. Since then they have been meeting regularly for dinner. Katie was glad that they got along well. After all, with Mary she always had the feeling that she wanted to fix her up with Sherlock. At least for Christmas. But she was sure, after seeing how happy she was with David, Mary accepted it and deviated from her plans.  
Well, and Sherlock had got to know the detective properly on one of his visits to the lab.

She and David had been together for a month and he visited Katie regularly at the lab. One evening, when most of her colleagues had already left, he surprised her. She greeted him as usual with a kiss. Only this time a feeling overpowered her so she couldn't hold back any more. They devoured to a passionate kiss. He lifted her onto the table and kissed her further until suddenly Sherlock was standing in the doorway.  
He cleared his throat and turned back to the door as quickly as he could. Unsuspecting that the door was already closed again, he ran against it. The result of the evening was a slight laceration on Sherlock's forehead and a rather embarrassed Detective Constable.

Since that evening, Sherlock has not been coming to the laboratory on duty. John said that he was busy with cases or helping Mary and him with the wedding preparations for some reason.   
Well, and she was busy with David and their blossoming relationship. 

So now she was rummaging through her wardrobe looking for a suitable outfit for tonight. She eventually decided on a longer elegant dress and matching shoes. It would be all right, she thought.

After an hour the doorbell rang and David waited outside her door with a smile and a bouquet of roses. She approached him joyfully, kissed him and thanked him for the flowers. Then she took her jacket and bag and followed him in his arms to the taxi.

  
It was not a long way to the restaurant and when they entered it, her breath stopped. They were standing in a large hall with huge chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. A spiral staircase was at the end of the hall and led to another dining area. As it turned out, they were to sit right there. So she walked down the grand hall, the magnificent staircase, where each step was set with small diamonds and glittering, to her table. The concierge showed her table and asked her to sit down. In the background she heard soft classical music. She was thrilled and beamed with enthusiasm. She bent over the table to kiss it in thanks.  
The waiter interrupted her and asked for her drinks. When he turned to David, he froze and looked at him in surprise.  
"David? David Reid?"

David looked confused.  
"Uh, yes, but excuse me, do I know you?"

"It's me, Peter. Peter Jenkins from Missouri."

He stared at him with big eyes before he relaxed.  
"Yeah, sure. Peter! How are you doing? What are you doing here? Oh, sorry. This is Katie, by the way. She's my girlfriend. Katie, this is Peter. We met in Missouri when I lived there. You remember?"

Katie smiled and then held her hand out to Peter. He was a little smaller than David. Had longer blond hair and a slight beard shadow. Striking were those bright blue eyes. He wore a suit and bow tie. The usual outfit of the waiters here.  
"Yes of course. Hello. Nice to meet you"

"The pleasure is all mine and you can call me Peter" he smiled, took her hand and kissed the back of her hand.

David rolled his eyes. He knew that he had gotten all the women around him that way back then. But not his Katie. She was different.

"So, Peter, what are you doing here in London?"

Peter told him that he wanted to stay in London permanently and that he was going to make ends meet with this job here. Then he had to go on working for a while but asked if they still wanted to have a drink after he left. Katie looked at him with a warning and David declined his offer without arranging a meeting for tomorrow.  
After that he left them alone. He only disturbed them when he brought the drinks or the food.

Katie was glad. After all, she wanted to enjoy this evening with her boyfriend. She clearly had better things on her mind about what she wanted to do that evening. At that thought she had to smile and David wondered what was so funny.  
She bent over the table, whispered something in his ear and minutes later he had paid and they were sitting in a taxi to her home.

When they entered her flat it didn't take long before they had gotten rid of all their clothes and were now lying tightly wrapped in her bed. He lay behind her and gently kissed her bare back, up to her shoulders and neck. When he reached her ear, he nibbled it lightly and then whispered softly "I love you Katie" in her ear.

She froze suddenly and could find no words. He loved her but did she love him too? She didn't know the answer, instead she turned around, smiled and kissed him. Then she snuggled up against his neck and closed her eyes. She hoped he would not ask. David sensed her uneasiness but didn't want to push her to do anything. Instead, he took her in his arms and then closed his eyes. 


	25. Typical Sherlock

The next morning Katie woke up alone in her bed. David had left her a message saying that Lestrade had called him in and that he would get back to her later.  
She recalled last night and felt bad that she had no answer to his confession.  
But she was not sure if she felt the same way about him. The last time she felt what it means to love a person was with Sherlock. She knew that sooner or later he would expect an answer from her, but she didn't know the answer. She moaned and brushed the hair out of her face.

Then she got up, put on her bathrobe and slurped into the bathroom. She wouldn't have to start in the lab until noon today, so she decided to take a long shower. She got dressed and made herself a coffee. Since the sun was shining outside, she decided to have her coffee on her roof terrace. She just wanted to quickly fetch the newspaper and her mail, which was always outside her door. She opened the door, picked up the newspaper and noticed an envelope with no sender on it. When she opened it, she froze and the coffee cup fell to the floor.  
She looked incredulously at the contents of the envelope and had to blink several times to make sure it was real.

In her hands she held a newspaper clipping. It was entitled _"Executioner - murderer sentenced to death"_ and was written in red next to it: **You will bleed for this!**

She did not know what was happening. Could it be? Had he found her? But the trial was over and he was executed a week ago. So who was it? And what was she supposed to do now?

She quickly picked up the shards, wiped the stain away before packing her bag and running out the door. She didn't know why but she suddenly found herself standing in front of this black door marked 221B. With trembling fingers she pressed the bell. After minutes when no one answered, she pressed another bell. It did not take long and the door opened.

"Hello? Oh it's you dear. Did you come to see me?" the elderly lady asked friendly as always.

"Hello Mrs Husdon. Well, actually I came to see Sherlock. But I don't think he'll be in. I'll just come back later," she said and was about to turn around.

"No, no. He's upstairs. He's probably just frozen the bell again. Wait, I'll take you to him." she stopped Katie and pulled her inside.

They didn't get far though, when a tall man with dark curls booted down the stairs and called out for Mrs Husdon. But when he saw Katie, he stopped.

"Katie? What are you doing here?" he asked in amazement.

Katie was nervous.  
"I need your help," she said in a slightly shaky voice. 

Why was she so nervous?

Sherlock didn't say anything, just turned to the side and indicated to her to come up.  
Katie turned to the older lady, thanked her with a smile and then walked with a heavy step past Sherlock, up to his flat.  
She stood nervously in the room, waiting for him to follow her.  
After closing the door, he took a seat in his armchair. He made no attempt to offer her a seat.

"So, what can I do for you?" he asked afterwards and folded his hands under his chin.  
Katie still stood frozen in place before taking a deep breath and then fished the envelope from her pocket. She watched Sherlock slowly approach his microscope on the kitchen table as she spoke.  
"This is about Holden Bennett."

Sherlock, now staring into the lens, interrupted her.  
"This serial killer from Chicago. He's dead. I read that he was executed last week. So what else is there?"

Katie was just about to continue talking when the ringing of his phone stopped her. He gestured to her to wait and then he took the call.

What was wrong with him? Why was he like that to her? Katie could not form an answer. It was a mistake to come here.  
She then turned around, her head slightly lowered and spoke softly.  
"Sorry to disturb you. I shouldn't have come over. Goodbye!" and stepped out the door.

She would have to find help somewhere else. With quick steps she went down the stairs and ran out the door.


	26. I love...

Sherlock was still sitting at the table, had finished the call when he heard the door slam. Where had she gone? He stepped to the window and looked out. He saw her just leaving Baker Street and getting into a taxi. He leaned his forehead against the window and ran his fingers through his curls.  
He could not explain why he had reacted in this way. She was here, with him, asking for his help. What was it about?, he asked himself. What had he abandoned her with now?

It must have been something important or she wouldn't have turned up at his place on Baker Street. He'd have to go and see her again later. But now he had to go to the mortuary to see Molly, who had new body parts for his experiments.

He arrived at the mortuary half an hour later.  
He was about to push open the door when he heard a familiar voice and stopped. He would not listen. He would listen and perceive his surroundings with all his senses. At least that's what he used to say to John.

"I'm telling you, David told me yesterday that he loved me!"

"Really, madness! And how did you react? What did you say?" It was Molly who asked.

"I didn't say anything. Instead, I kissed him and then pretended to be asleep."

"Oh, Katie. Do you even love him?"

"No... Yeah... Maybe... I don't... I don't know, Molly. I like him a lot, but --"

"But you're not sure, are you? Is it Sherlock?"

"Molly, I don't know! I--"

Just at that moment the door swung open and Sherlock entered. Immediately the room fell silent and Katie looked embarrassed at the floor.

"I think I better go. I'm sure you two have something to talk about," Katie said now and turned around immediately.

Molly tried to stop her, but by then she was already out the door. 

Sherlock stepped in, but took a quick look at her before turning to Molly.  
After a short time he had disappeared again and was now following the corridor to the lift, which took him upstairs.

He stopped at the laboratory door when he heard voices again. This time it was a female and a male voice. He thought briefly of his first encounter with Dt. Reid and did not want to burst into such an intimate situation again when he suddenly heard the two of them arguing.

"How could you tell him about my past in Chicago You know very well that I still have to be careful and not everybody is allowed to know about it!" 

"I only told him that you had lived there for a time. Trust me, I've known Peter forever and you can trust him." That was clearly that detective.  
"Still... Just after what happened this morning. You just had no right!" she shouted.

Detective Reid was about to say something back when his phone rang.   
"I'm sorry, but I have to go. Can we talk about this later?"

When Sherlock suddenly heard approaching footsteps, he quickly moved away from the door and hid in the next room. When he was sure the air was clear, he went back out and into the laboratory.

Katie stood with her back to him and angrily sorted some papers.   
"Trouble in paradise?" he asked cynically.

Katie turned around in horror and then sparkled at him angrily.  
"I don't see how that concerns you! And no, it was just a little difference of opinion. What are you doing here anyway? Don't you have some case to work on?"

"We were interrupted earlier. What do you need my help with now?" he asked.

"I've already spoken to Greg about it. You obviously had no time or interest in helping me," she sighed.

"Okay. Well then, that's fine. Although I can imagine that they can't help you and will turn to me anyway," he replied in an arrogant tone.

Katie twisted her eyes annoyingly.  
"We will see!" 

Sherlock wanted to say something, but then decided against it and disappeared from the door.


	27. Stag party

A good month has now passed since Katie received this death threat. It's been quiet since then. Greg and her boyfriend David said she should still be careful, but she didn't care any more.  
With David, she was able to put their differences aside. She also got to know his friend Peter better and quickly realised that he was no threat. During their meetings he had always been very charming towards her and put her off with a nice evening when David was called to the yard at short notice.

Today was the stag party of Mary and John. Sherlock wanted to go for a drink with him in the places where murders once happened and Mary wanted to go out and celebrate too. There are only 4 weeks left in freedom and she wanted to enjoy them. She decided to hit the clubs in London and go dancing. It was supposed to be a small party with Molly, a certain Janine and Katie. Katie knew that Mary didn't have many friends she trusted so she kept it small. David had made a date for tonight with his mate Peter. Katie would see him again tomorrow at lunchtime.

She was just standing at the bar to order the next round of drinks. The evening had already progressed and the level of the women had gradually increased. She saw Mary and Molly laughing and enjoying themselves in one of the separees. Janine had just come to help her with the drinks. She was nice. She was a pretty brunette who knew how to handle her charms as a woman. The bartender also seemed to be quite taken with her because he literally undressed her with his eyes. Katie rolled her eyes when he heard the young man stammer in front of her but Janine was happy and seemed to go for it.

'Well then, one of us won't be going home alone today,' she thought and smiled.

Katie came back to the table a little later with the drinks in her hand. Mary was already quite drunk by now. She leaned over to her and mumbled to her:

"Annnnnd, you! Do you have any idea how upset I was when I heard you were going with that Detective Reid. I thought you loved Sherlock!" She looked at her with a warning, as good as she could in her condition.

Katie blushed instantly and felt uncomfortable. Then she mumbled on.

"But now I'm happy for you. He is very nice. Will you marry him too?"  
But before Katie could say anything, Molly interfered.

"For that she would have to confess her love to him first" she giggled, also slightly drunk. 

Katie looked startled at Molly and then at Mary, who sat next to her, pouting but smiling.

"Um, aren't we going dancing?" she said instead, pulling her along. Janine was still standing at the bar, flirting with the bartender.

Katie was glad that the two of them agreed and gradually noticed that they were becoming normal again. The alcohol was literally danced out and sweating. She also honestly didn't want to talk to them about it or have to justify why she hadn't told David she loved him yet. She did not even know herself.

It was now just after midnight when they left the dance floor and went back to their table. Janine had apparently managed to break away from her bartender and was now sipping her drink. She was beaming all over her face when the three women returned. She immediately told them about her flirtation and that they would meet later, after his shift. Katie was about to respond when she was interrupted by the vibrating alarm in her trouser pocket.  
Her face lit up as she read the name on the display.

**I'm waiting outside the door of the club and have a surprise for you :) David**

She apologised briefly to her friends and then left the club. She stood in front of the entrance for a while and looked around. David was nowhere to be seen. Instead, a black limousine car drove up. The doorman at the club said it was for her and she should get in.  
Katie was a bit sceptical but she knew David had a surprise for her so she carefully got into the car. Inside, she could see that the passenger cabin was slightly larger and the privacy screen was raised up to the driver's cabin.   
She was about to say something when the car started to move.

"Excuse me, but if this is a bride kidnapping, then you have the wrong person" she joked.

"Oh, I don't think so, Ms. Matthews" rang it from the top. The partition wall was half down in the meantime. But since it was dark, she could not see who was sitting there. His voice sounded muffled.

She froze at that name for a moment. Something was wrong. No one knew about it except her friends and Sherlock. 

"David? Is that you? What are you doing?" she asked hesitantly.  
The driver did not answer.

In panic she then pulled the handles and tried to open the doors. But nothing moved. When she noticed that there was no escape, she let herself fall into the seat and carefully pulled her phone out of her trouser pocket. Always careful to keep her eyes on the partition so he wouldn't notice. She dialled the first number in her call list. It was Mary's. Then she took a deep breath and spoke:

"I think you have me confused with someone else. My name is Wilson, Katie Wilson. Who are you and what do you want from me? Wait, you wrote me that note, didn't you?" she asked in shock.

"You'll find out soon enough, Miss Matthews or Wilson, but right now..."

Katie was hoping Mary would pick up or at least have her voicemail record the message, when suddenly a gas poured into the cabin and she lost consciousness instantly.

She didn't wake up for several hours later. Her arms felt numb and she froze all over. She noticed a strange pressure on her neck. Something was stuck in the right side of her neck. She wanted to reach for it, but her arms could not move. They were tied above her head and hung on a hook.  
She was still quite dazed and could only see outlines. It was dark and cold. In front of her she noticed a few things hanging from the ceiling. She couldn't see what it was but they didn't move.  
Then she lost consciousness again.


	28. In the trap

Katie woke up again when she heard footsteps.  
It was still dark.   
The person moved slowly towards her but she couldn't see anything when she suddenly recognised by a voice who had abducted her.

"Good morning Sleeping Beauty. Did you have a good night?"

Peter? Could it be, this voice belonged to Peter Jenkins, David's friend. The person who was always so charming to her?

With a trembling voice, probably more because of the cold than because of fear, she spoke.  
"Peter? Is that you? Peter Jenkins?"

Only now did he go to a light switch. It was a bright light and it took Katie a few moments to get used to it. Only then did she see where she was.

She was in a cold store and in front of her, pig carcasses hanging from the ceiling, already slightly rotting. Probably because the temperatures were much too warm for the meat. And not far away from her was an empty chair.

"Well actually I've only been called Jenkins since I was 10 years old. Before that my name was Bennett, Peter Bennett. Well, do you remember that name? "Yes, Holden Bennett was my father, and you killed him and you're gonna bleed." He screamed and left her sight, only to come back a little later with a dirty bucket.

Katie was frozen in shock and held her breath at the name he pronounced. 

"So, what are you going to do now? Are you going to cut off my head like your father?" she asked, pointing to the bucket with her eyes.

"Oh, don't be silly! I have no interest in imitating my father in this. I have my own methods. I told you I'd make you bleed! Well, I'll bleed her slowly and watch the end of it!"

"What? You're crazy! We're in a refrigeration chamber that's obviously still in use. They'll find me!" she screamed, if the cold allowed it.

"You have an excellent sense of perception. Yes, the chamber is still in use. But by me. Remember the first time we met in the restaurant. Well, I'm not just the waiter. I'm also responsible for delivering the meat and checking this refrigeration unit. So no one but me will come here!"

"But David will be looking for me. After all, I'm his girlfriend and we have a dinner date. If I don't show up, he'll be surprised!"

"Oh, yes, David. Gullible David. He just won't be surprised. That's taken care of," he said, pulling her phone out of her pocket.

_**Hey ;) I don't think I'll be able to make it for dinner today. It's been a long night :D Don't be angry. I love you!** _

He had obviously written him a message from her and canceled the dinner. But wait, did he end the message with "I love you"?   
"What an idiot," she thought. She would never end her messages that way. And David knows that. She hadn't even told him yet. He would know something was wrong. She hoped so, anyway.

"You know, it wasn't so easy to find you. I only knew from the media at the time that my father's last victim could be saved by the FBI in her flat. But when David told me that you lived in Chicago for some time and had to leave because of a terrible event, I could put two and two together. The pictures that you presented as evidence at the trial then told me what you looked like. By the way, I was one of the jurors at that time and I could see her that way. Just in case you were wondering.  
All right, enough of this. Let's not waste any time," he said and put the bucket under her.

He slowly opened the tube, but only enough to let it drip out steadily.  
Katie wanted to fight back, wanted to kick him with her feet but she was so cold she couldn't stand it any more.

"Well, now, take it easy. The more you move, the faster it goes. And I've got my day off today and a lot of time. I think in 3 hours you will be a little bit dizzy. You will probably pass out at some point. In 10 hours at the most everything will be over, although I think you will have frozen to death before then" he explained and then sat down on the chair in front of her.

"How do you know all this?" she asked horrified but with a certain astonishment in her voice.

"Oh, didn't I tell you? I am actually a medical doctor. But I was suspended because I suffered a nervous breakdown and almost ended a person's life because of a simple mistake. You know, when I heard about my father's execution, a world shattered for me. I loved my father! Even though my mother had left him, I always idolized and loved him, no matter what he was! And YOU killed him! It will be a real pleasure for me to kill them now as a compensation and that very slowly" he grinned smugly.

Katie noticed how slowly her blood dripped into the bucket beneath her. She was shaking all over and she was sure he was right and that no-one would find her here in time. She didn't want to die but she also believed her end was near. The man in front of her, who had pretended to be her boyfriend's best friend, had planned everything very carefully. 

She thought about her friends she had found by chance in the last years and who were always there for her. John, Molly, Greg, Mrs Husdon and Mary. All these friendly faces she would never be able to see again. Nor would she be able to see Mary and John saying YES to each other. And she wouldn't be able to see Molly's wedding and see how happy she was and how happy she would be when she walked down the aisle. Then she thought about her friend David. She hadn't expected to find such a dear, sensitive, sincere man, who was completely infatuated with her, in her life. How he told her he loved her. The feelings she felt for him but could not give him back that love.   
And then her thoughts wandered to Sherlock. Their first meeting, their first kiss, the night together and the time with him in Chicago. How her heart leapt with every thought of him, every smile or accidental touch and how she always wanted to be close to him. Mary was right. She loved Sherlock. But she could never tell him. She regretted it and she secretly wished that she had. But now it wouldn't matter anyway because she'd never see him again. Never to look into those wonderful eyes again. A pleasant warmth to the thoughts of his eyes, spread. But she could not hold out for long. 

The cold took hold of her body much too quickly and she gradually became sleepy again.


	29. kidnapped

Sherlock was sitting in his Baker Street armchair, lost in thought, when suddenly an angry Mary and John burst in. Their telephone in hand. It was still very early. The sun had only risen a few hours ago.

"Sherlock! You have to help us. I think something's happened to Katie," she burst in, explaining what happened last night and immediately handed him her phone.

She played back the message on his voicemail. It was listening to Katie talking to someone and asking what he wanted from her. She sounded panicked. In the background he recognised the sound of engines and he knew she must be in a car. When the message suddenly stopped, he looked at Mary and John in shock.

He got up with a swing, put on his coat (although the temperatures were mild by now, he had to be there) and ran out the door.

"Where are you going?" cried John after him.

"To the club" it was now shouting from below. 

Mary and John followed him and a little later were in a taxi that was to take them to the club.

Twenty minutes later they arrived at the same club. They realised that staff from Scotland Yard were also there. Apparently they already knew about it.  
"Sherlock, John, Mary? What are you all doing here?" asked the Detective Inspector, slightly confused.

"It's about Katie. I think she's been kidnapped" said Mary.

Greg breathed deeply and stroked his face with his hands.  
"Yes, I know. Constable Reid had received a strange message from her and she was not at home or at Barts," he sighed. "But wait, how do you know about this?!" and looked at her questioningly.

Sherlock briefly explained to him that Mary had received a message from her tonight and what the content of the message was. Then Greg told them that Katie came to him about a month ago. She had an envelope with her. It contained an article in the newspaper threatening to kill her.

All three stood there stunned and said nothing. Sherlock was about to say something when a desperate Detective Constable rushed to him.

"Greg, I have... Oh, Mr Holmes, John, Mary? What are you doing here?"  
Mary told him about the message she got from Katie on her voicemail David nodded and then turned back to Greg.

"I was able to track down the employee who let people in and out the door yesterday. He'll be here in 10 minutes" 

"Very good. In the meantime, Mary what happened yesterday?" he asked and looked at her.

Mary talked about her evening and then she explained that Katie suddenly got a message and beamed and went outside. They assumed it was from David.   
He turned to her in shock and replied that he hadn't written her a message yesterday.  
Sherlock then asked him to look in his messages. David sighed, but finally reached for his phone. He scrolled through the sent messages and didn't have to search long. Without a word he held it in front of their faces. He became as white as a sheet. 

"Well, if you didn't write her that message, then who did?" Sherlock asked.

"I have no idea. I was at work all day yesterday and in the evening I met up with my mate Peter." He paused. "Wait, Peter was with me. We had a bit too much to drink and at some point I fell asleep. But no, that's impossible. It can't be," he noted with a startled look. 

"What's his name?" Sherlock was excited and shook him on his shoulders.

"Peter Jenkins."

"Lestrade, have a search made immediately for a Peter Jenkins in the files Find out everything you can about him. And put out an APB for him!" cried Sherlock.

Greg immediately spoke into his phone and requested all the data from Peter Jenkins. In the meantime, the doorman from last night had also arrived and he told you that a black limousine car had been provided for her and was taking her away. He also knew the number plate number. Lestrade now also issued a search notice for the car. 

A little later Greg's phone rang with the information about Peter Jenkins.  
Sherlock turned around expectantly and listened to what the DI had to say.

"Peter Jenkins, born Bennett. Mother: Christin Brown, now Jenkins, Father: Holden Bennett; born in the USA, last lived in Missouri, since a few months in London, works at Clos Maggiore".

Sherlock looked at him with wide open eyes.  
"Wait, what did you say? Bennett? Is his father the Holden Bennett who's now executed as the executioner-killer?"

Both John and Mary looked at him with startled looks. John was the first to find his language again.  
"Wait, you mean the one who tried to kill Katie too?

But Sherlock did not answer, but turned to Lestrade.  
"Find the car and I want all the information about the evaluation of the letter" he ordered.

Then he turned away and was ready to go when he heard in the background that Lestrade was getting another call.

"Sherlock! We have found the car. It's parked in an alley a few streets away from here!"

He turned around immediately and followed the DI. John and Mary after it. Greg sent another officer to Clos Maggiore to get more information about Peter Jenkins.  
It was not long before they reached the car. Sherlock took a pair of gloves out of his pocket and opened the cabin at once. He flew over the entire cabin with a glance before he went to the driver's cabin. He pulled out his little magnifying glass and studied every single centimetre. Then he noticed a tiny piece of fabric on the driver's seat that was not visible to the naked eye. He picked it up carefully and put it into a small tube.

Then he leaned out again.  
"You may begin your examination. Let me know if you find anything" turned around and walked quickly to the street to wave a taxi. What remained was a puzzled DI and a questioning looking couple.

***

He arrived a short time later and jumped out of the taxi. He followed the long corridor, up the stairs to his destination. He had just arrived at the lab when Molly came in.  
She seemed stressed and looked quite exhausted.

"Oh, hello, Sherlock." she greeted him in a tired voice.  
"I hope you won't be needing anything from me today. I'm pretty exhausted and as Katie didn't turn up for work today, I have to do her work too".

So she did not know it yet.

"She won't be coming back today either. She has been kidnapped and, frankly, I need YOUR help. I have discovered some fibres here and I need to know what family of fabric they belong to" he explained.

Molly stood there with her mouth open and stared at him.  
"How... how kidnapped? What happened? Is she all right? Is she alive or dead?" She almost whispered that last part.

"MOLLY!" Sherlock yelled at her with a warning.  
"Are you going to help me now, or are you going to continue asking questions here that are just wasting time?!

It took her a moment before she caught herself again and hurried over to the individual chemicals that were supposed to filter out the composition of individual elements of the fabric.

After more than an hour, they discovered that it was a fibre residue from a standard hygiene suit used in laboratories or in the food industry. There was only one particle left which they could not identify. The mystery was solved when Sherlock answered his phone a short time later.

"Sherlock. We found residues of chloroform in a small tube under the seat in the car. We also found out from his workplace that he works both as a waiter and is responsible for meat deliveries and --"

"Polar coat" he whispered softly.

"What did they say?"

Sherlock excitedly held the phone in his hand and screamed.  
"Lestrade. She's in a cold store. I've found a scrap of fabric that has Polarcoat - a special coating for hygiene suits specifically designed to work in cold chambers. Immediately send all emergency personnel to the refrigeration facilities belonging to the restaurant! I'll wait for them by the beard!"

Even before Greg could admonish him to have illegally stolen evidence again, he had already hung up.

Molly stood motionless in the room and stared at him.  
"What's wrong?"

Sherlock smiled slightly at her and replied, "We've got a lead."

Then he pulled his coat off the hook and walked out the door.

Moments later, a grey-mottled car with a mobile siren on the roof was already racing through the streets, stopping in front of the detective.  
Sherlock immediately got in and they drove away. Reid in the driver's seat and Greg beside him. Next to Sherlock in the back seat was another officer. Greg turned to Sherlock and said there were three facilities. He had sent some officers to two of them and they were now on their way to the third. It was the oldest one and had been running at a low level for a few years because the temperature control was broken and was getting too hot for the meat products.  
On the way there he got news again that the others would be empty.  
So she had to be in the third one. 

'Hopefully she's there', he thought.

"I hope you are not mistaken! And I hope we're not too late," Greg replied to him in a slightly anxious tone. 

Sherlock just stared out the window and prayed that it wasn't too late.


	30. rescue

Katie woke up every now and then for a fraction of a second and looked around.   
'So it wasn't a nightmare. It was real and she would die here,' she thought.

She didn't know what time it was but she had lost all feeling in her body. Her limbs were all numb. Her legs gave way but she couldn't fall because she was tied down. The pain in her wrists caused by the pull of the ropes she could hardly feel because of the numbness.

A look in the bucket showed her that there was already more than 1 litre of her blood there. It would not be long before it was over. But probably she would have frozen to death before that. Her heartbeat slowed down noticeably and she had difficulty staying awake.  
She was about to close her eyes again when she suddenly heard dull footsteps from outside. It couldn't have been Peter, he was still sitting in the chair in front of her and sleeping.  
Then she heard several voices. She wanted to scream but the cold took away all her strength to do anything. It only brought forth soft moans and whimpering.  
This woke up Peter.

"Well, still alive? You are one tough bitch!"

Then he suddenly stopped when he heard the voices too. He took a quick step to the end of the room, placed himself next to the door, pulled a knife out of his pocket and then turned out the light.

Katie still tried to get words out of her mouth but failed.  
A little later, the door was carefully pushed open and Detective Reid entered at gunpoint. Katie opened her eyes, mumbled softly but he could not hear her.

As he stood a few feet in the room, Jenkins suddenly surprised him and stabbed him. As it was dark, she couldn't see where he was hit. But she saw him fall to the ground. Now she made a louder sound and screamed, even though it hurt.

"No, David!"

Jenkins had left the room by now to seek out the others. Reid lay on the floor and said nothing. Then she fainted again.

She slowly woke up when she noticed a sudden jolt to her body and heard soft pleading of her name. She opened her eyes and saw Sherlock before her.  
He put his cloak around her and finally freed her from her shackles. She did not fall as Sherlock held her down and now lifted her into his arms. She saw Greg taking care of David, who groaned in pain and held his shoulder. Oh good, so he was still alive. 

"The ambulance is already waiting outside. And Peter Jenkins has just been taken away in handcuffs," Greg said to Sherlock, looking at Katie, who had fainted again.  
Sherlock nodded and then left the room with her in his arms.

He took her to the nearby ambulance, where the rescuers immediately took care of her, not without a surprised look at her neck and then at Sherlock.

They cared for her to the point where she was stable enough for transport. When they had finished, they asked him if he would like to go with them. Greg just came out of the building with the injured Reid and took him to the second ambulance. He saw Sherlock and nodded at him.

Then Sherlock turned around and followed the paramedic to the place where he was supposed to sit.

The ride did not take long. They drove through the streets of London with the siren blaring. They took Katie to the operating theatre as quickly as they could. She was now on a ventilator as her breathing had stopped during the journey.

Sherlock followed her for as long as he could, but was then politely but firmly rejected by the paramedics when they reached the door, which was for staff only.  
Sherlock sat there all day. John and Mary had joined them at some point after he had informed them. And Molly came along too. Again and again doctors ran in and out frantically. No-one said anything.   
Greg came by at some point to check on her condition. Sherlock asked him about Detective Reid's injuries and Greg was a little surprised. He said that he was lucky and Jenkins had only injured his shoulder. He was stitched and bandaged. Otherwise he was fine. He was only supposed to stay one night for observation.  
Sherlock nodded again and then turned his gaze back to the door.

Around 8pm a doctor finally came out.

"What about her?" all three asked anxiously and got up from their chairs. Greg had left in the meantime and apologised as he still had some paperwork to do.  
He told the doctor that she was stable so far. She had lost a lot of blood. They had to help with transfusions. She had suffered a cardiac arrest during the operation, but they managed to bring her back. But they had to put her in an artificial coma because of the damage, as her brain was without oxygen for several minutes. But according to him, she would wake up on her own in a day or two.

John, Mary and also Sherlock breathed a sigh of relief when they heard that she was alive.

"Can we see her?" John asked now.

"She is in intensive care now. Please, one person at a time and just for a short time," the doctor replied and showed them the way.

When they arrived outside the room, they stopped.  
John was the first to go in and froze at the sight of what he saw. Katie was lying there, connected to several hoses. She was not breathing on her own. A ventilator helped her. But the regular sinus rhythm of her heart calmed him down. He went over to her and took her hand in his. Then he spoke to her. He knew that people who were in a coma could still hear voices and touches and that it could help them wake up.

Sherlock and Mary still stood in front of it and waited. Sherlock walked up and down. Hands crossed behind him.  
"I can't do this. I can't do this" he murmured.

He made Mary nervous and she stopped him as soon as she grabbed his arm.

"Can't do what, Sherlock?"

Sherlock looked first at her hand on her arm and then at her face. Then he took a deep breath.

"I can't go in there. I can't see her like this. Mary, I saw her there. She was freezing cold and her skin was blue. I thought she was dead. Then on the drive I witnessed them trying to save her life over and over again.   
She had asked me for help and I turned her away. If I hadn't been so distant, she wouldn't be lying in there fighting for her life right now!"  
Tears came to his face. He tried to blink them away.

Mary sighed and stroked his arm comfortingly.  
"Sherlock, you heard the doctor. She is alive and will wake up in a day or two! She needs us now!" 

Sherlock tried to listen to Mary but his thoughts kept going back to the one person lying there in a coma.

"No, I just can't!"  
He turned around and walked quickly towards the exit. He could no longer hold back the tears.

"Sherlock!" Mary called out after him, but he was already gone.

With her head bowed, she now stood outside the room and waited. John came out a little later. His eyes seemed watery.  
"Where is Sherlock?" he asked afterwards.

"He's gone. He said he couldn't!" sighed Mary.

John was horrified. He was filled with rage. He pulled Mary with him and was about to leave the building when she held him back and asked to see Katie first.  
John understood and then loosened his grip on her arm.


	31. concessions

Sherlock lay on the sofa with his body stretched out and stared at the ceiling. Again and again the image of Katie came into his head when he found her.

_Greg had managed to knock the kidnapper down with the help of the other officer. Sherlock then went into the room where he heard her voice before. It was dark and he could only make out the outlines. He groped for the light switch and a little later he could see that he was standing in a room with slightly decomposed pig carcasses. Detective Reid lay unconscious and with an injured shoulder in front of him. His gaze wandered further through the room and there at the end he could locate her. She was tied with her arms above her head. Her body was hanging limply from the ceiling. Under her a dirty bucket. He could not see what the contents were in it. As he stepped closer, he saw that a tube used to take blood was sticking out of her throat and blood was dripping down. He accelerated his step and had reached her in a few seconds. He felt her pulse and noticed that she was only unconscious. When he touched her and shook her shoulders, he felt that she was freezing cold. Without hesitation he took off his coat and laid it gently over her freezing cold body. She opened her eyes but said nothing. He released her from her bonds and lifted her into his arms. A few seconds later she was unconscious again._   
_He quickly walked out of the building to the emergency team that had rushed in. They immediately wrapped her in a rescue blanket and put her on the stretcher. He couldn't have noticed them staring at him questioningly when they discovered the tube on her neck. Sherlock just shrugged and they continued their work._   
_He stood outside the closed doors of the ambulance for a while when he saw Detective Reid coming out of the building supported by Greg. What he immediately noticed was that he didn't take a worried look at the car Katie was in. He moaned, probably in pain, and let Greg lead him to the second ambulance that was called._   
_Sherlock was able to accompany Katie to the hospital a little later. He did not hesitate when he was asked. As he drove, he noticed that the paramedics ran frantically through the transport compartment of the car, shouting repeatedly to the driver to go faster. His heart stopped when he suddenly heard that she had stopped breathing. Panic rose in him. It didn't subside until hours later when the doctor said she was stable._

He was torn from his thoughts when he heard dull, heavy footsteps on the stairs and an angry John stormed into the room. Mary came after him.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" he shouted angrily.

Sherlock kept staring at the ceiling.  
"I couldn't do it."

"Couldn't do what? See her, talk to her? Help her come out of the coma?!"

"I just couldn't see her like that. She triggered something inside me and I don't know what it is. But I do know that I don't want to lose her. John, I saw her in that ambulance fighting for her life! And if I hadn't turned her away she wouldn't be there now and she's in a coma now," he said softly.

John sighed, stroked his face with his hands and then pulled himself to a chair.  
"Sherlock. She needs us now - all of us. And I can tell you what that is. It is love, my friend! You love her!" he said, now in a less angry tone. Mary stood beside him and squeezed his shoulder.

Sherlock jumped up and then sat upright. Looking down. He gave a long and deep sigh.  
"What happened to me, John? Years ago I was completely disconnected from feelings. And I had been happy"

"How can you know that? You were disconnected from your feelings. So how do you know if you were happy?" asked John.

Sherlock sighed again. Now he slowly raised his eyes.  
"I don't know. I mean, I could always think rationally. The solving of crimes has always been my top priority."

"Feelings are part of life, and also you, Sherlock, are a human like I."

"But it wasn't always so. You, Mary, Molly and Katie have literally poisoned me with emotion. I was completely satisfied but now, now I'm constantly feeling these strange disgusting emotions rising up inside me and I don't know how to deal with them.   
And yes, you're damn right! I think I love her," it burst out of him.

"Then get the hell over there and tell her!"   
It was Mary who now screamed.

"But how? She's in a coma and yet she's also with this Reid guy?"

"But only because you hurt her. She does not love him. She loves you," she replied.

Sherlock was just about to say something when the ringing of his phone interrupted her.  
It was Greg who asked to see him at the yard immediately. Sherlock said yes, got up and left the room. The phone still in her ear.

John and Mary were still there, looking at him in wonder. Then they both shook their heads in disbelief and then left Baker Street.


	32. coma

Katie had still not woken up from her coma. It had been almost a week now and the doctors were gradually at a loss. They were afraid that her body's condition would not regenerate and that the oxygen deprivation in her brain might have done too much damage.

John, Mary, Molly came by every day. David as often as work allowed. Greg and Mrs.Husdon were also visitors at her bedside from time to time. They often spoke to her and hoped she would wake up. Mary told her a lot about the latest wedding preparations and that she would pray to welcome them as guests on their wedding day. John would read her a few new entries from his blog every now and then and often apologised that Sherlock was stuck in a case and couldn't come. Molly came by during each of her breaks and often begged and cried by her bed. David, her boyfriend usually came by before his shift to wish her a good morning and sometimes after his shift to tell her about his day.

When there was still no change in her condition after five days, slowly all hope in them faded. The doctors said it was unusual and she should have been awake by now. 

Today was day number 6 and still no change. John had been with her very early and heard by chance that the doctors were talking about switching off the machines as they could hardly detect any brain activity.

He had just arrived home and fell onto his couch, exhausted. Mary was out and about. They also talked about postponing the wedding for the occasion but all her bookings could not be cancelled. Secretly, however, they were still hoping that all could turn out well and Katie could be there. There were just under 3 weeks to go.

He stared thoughtlessly into the room and thought about what he had heard. In front of him stood a glass of whiskey. He had poured one immediately on entering. 

Suddenly there was a knock on the door and as he slurped slowly there and opened the door, he saw Sherlock standing in front of him.

"John, I need your --"

He paused when he saw the expression on the blond man's face in front of him. He was pale and his eyes were swollen.

"Did something happen?" he asked afterwards.

John sighed, stepped aside so the detective could enter and slurped back to the couch. He poured himself another glass and asked Sherlock with a gesture if he should pour one for him too.  
But he refused.  
He sat down again and breathed deeply.

"I heard this morning that the doctors are considering switching off the machines. It would hardly show any brain activity at all."  
Tears came to his eyes.

"Sherlock, don't you see?! Katie is going to die!" he sobbed.

Sherlock sat motionless next to him, staring into the void, as John had done before. Suddenly he stood up and ran for the door.

John had a hard time calming down.  
"Where are you going now?" he shouted after him but by then he heard his door slam shut.

Sherlock arrived outside the hospital in the late afternoon. With heavy steps he followed the path that would lead him to her room.  
Arriving at her door, he stopped in his movements and took a deep breath. Then he finally pushed the door handle down and entered the room.

He had never been here before. Again and again he had been close to it, wandering up and down in front of her room, but then he left again.

He saw her for the first time now, since that day. It was a horrible sight. She lay in the hospital bed, a tube led out of her mouth, several wires went away from her body. The heart monitor was beeping. She was skinny, her face sunken. The pleasantly warm colour of her face had gradually faded. 

He stood there and could not move. He did not know what to do.   
At some point he slowly made his way towards her bed. Next to her bed stood a chair. Probably a visitor who had been here recently. He did not sit down. He just wandered through the room, his hands crossed behind his back and kept looking at the person he was about to lose.

Eventually he found his language again.

"Hello Katie. I honestly don't know what I'm doing here or what I should tell you. John told me to tell you about my day or say anything else"

'Phew, this is harder than I thought,' he thought to himself.

Then he finally sat down on the chair, because he noticed that his knees were slowly weakening.

"I'm sorry I couldn't come earlier but I had a lot to do."

There was a short break.

"No, sorry, that was a lie. I was not too busy, I was honestly afraid. Afraid of it because I feel guilty that I rejected you when you needed my help. Yeah, it sounds weird, doesn't it? I feel something. Or as you would say, the great master detective Sherlock Holmes has feelings.   
I honestly didn't know how to deal with them and when I found them in that freezer and saw them almost dying, I couldn't bear it. They have awakened feelings in me that no one has ever managed to awaken in me."

As he spoke, he saw that the signal of their pulse on the monitor increased slightly. He also noticed a sudden twitch of a finger of her hand. He moved closer and now took this hand in his.

"I couldn't bear the thought of losing you. That I could lose you!   
Please Katie, just wake up! I'm sitting here begging you! Just wake up!"

Tears came over him and he sobbed softly as he continued to hold her hand in his and squeeze it lightly.  
He let his head fall. With his forehead against the hand he was holding and continued to beg for her to wake up. 

He sat there for a few minutes when he suddenly heard a changed signal from the heart monitor. The regular sinus rhythm he had heard before had disappeared. Instead, the pulse increased rapidly and the frequency increased. The beeping became irregular.

Sherlock shot up his head instantly. 

"No, oh no! Don't you dare give up and leave me here alone with my feelings. Please! I need you! I love you!" he continued to beg and shook her lightly on her shoulders.

Then suddenly the irregular beeping changed and a constant monotonous continuous tone could be heard. Only a straight line was left on the heart monitor...


	33. dead

Sherlock was sitting at Katie's sickbed, having just confessed his love for her, when suddenly her heart stopped beating.

He froze instantly and kept looking at the monitor in front of him. His breath stood still. Nurses rushed in and immediately set off a heart alarm. Sherlock was still sitting at her bed, unable to move. They asked him to leave the room but he didn't hear them. He was in shock. As the doctor rushed in and ordered him out of the room, he slowly moved again and realised what was happening. Finally he was taken out of the room by a nurse.   
He stood for a moment at the now locked door, hoping that they could save her.

Slowly he left the place where he had been standing before and walked through the building as if by remote control. He muted every sound and also the nurse who asked him if he was all right. He just walked. His gaze empty.   
A voice familiar to him then suddenly took him out of his thoughts. When he looked around, he saw that he was now in the middle of the canteen. 

"Sherlock? Hello. What are you doing here? Did you come to see Katie, or are you here to see me?"

He slowly turned to the voice and now looked into warm brown eyes that looked at him questioningly.

"I, um... "I, uh... uh, I..."  
He did not know what to say. He thanked God if he believed in him that Molly had just been interrupted by a text message.

She suddenly turned white and stared at the display in front of her.  
"It... it goes... it's about Katie. Something is wrong. I, um... I'm supposed to come up right now," she stammered.

Sherlock nodded and followed her at the same time.   
When they entered the ward, she immediately asked one of the nurses what had happened.

"Dr. Hooper, hello. Oh, yes. Ms Wilson had a cardiac arrest. The doctors are trying to resuscitate her right now," said the nurse in a sympathetic tone.

Molly stood still. Tears formed in her eyes. She looked towards the room where doctors were trying to save her friend. Her legs became weak and she sat down on one of the chairs in front of it.  
Sherlock stood beside her. He didn't want to and couldn't sit down. Again and again he looked down at Molly, who was sitting on the chair crying. He wanted to say something, something that would make her stop crying, but nothing came to his mind. Instead, he put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed it gently.  
When Molly looked up in shock, he smiled at her slightly.  
She turned away again, but the sobbing did not stop. At some point she stood up and put her head on his shoulder. She was still crying. Sherlock felt quite uncomfortable in this situation. Gently he tapped her back with his hand.   
After a few seconds she released herself and sat down again. She looked at him apologetically. Her cheeks coloured slightly. Then she gradually calmed down again.

Sherlock was feeling quite uncomfortable at that moment and immediately took flight. His way led him outside. In a quiet corner he dropped against the wall. He only casually noticed that he had arrived at the smoking area, the staff member's corner.  
He walked shakily towards one of them. He just needed that now.

As he stood in front of a rather young employee, who was pulling on his cigarette with relish, he opened his mouth.

"May I have one of those?" he asked, pointing to the cigarettes in front of him.

The young man looked at him with a slightly sceptical look when he finally held out his pack to him.

"Had a hard day, huh?" he asked and offered him a light at the same time.

But Sherlock did not answer. He just pulled at his cigarette and pushed the smoke out. The young man saw that his counterpart was not in the mood for small talk, finished his cigarette and then went back into the building.  
Sherlock was still standing there, pulling on it, and just for a moment wanted his thoughts to stop. But when he realised that it was hopeless and that not even this addiction could change anything, he finally put it out and walked back towards the front door.


	34. alive

He hadn't even gone all the way into the ICU door when an agitated Molly confronted him.

"Sherlock" she shouted. "She's awake! They managed to get Katie back and she's finally awake!" she exclaimed joyfully.

He could not believe it. She's alive and she's awake! He felt a sense of relief rising within him. So she made it after all. She is awake and the most important thing is that she is alive.

"We can go to her for a moment. David is already there. Will you come?"

Sherlock was just about to head for the room when he heard her boyfriend was already there. He felt a stab in his heart and was disappointed. Of course, her boyfriend. She was now involved with this Detective Reid.   
How could he believe that everything would change now.

"Go ahead. I'll let John and Mary know!"

Molly noticed the disappointment in his voice, but just nodded and then turned around.

Sherlock was still standing there like rooted to the spot. Then he pulled his phone out of his pocket and wrote John a short message.

**She is awake. SH**

He briefly considered whether he should tell him about her sudden cardiac arrest, but then decided against it. He would know anyway, as soon as he was here.  
He put his phone back and saw that this Detective Reid had just left her room and was slowly moving towards him.  
He said nothing as he walked past him. He just nodded at him briefly and then disappeared out the door. 

When Sherlock noticed that he had left the station, he walked slowly towards her door. He was just about to knock when he saw the door open a crack and voices were coming from inside.  
It was Molly and Katie talking.  
He paused when he heard what they were talking about.

"It was strange, Molly. I felt myself getting weaker and weaker and being pulled into a darkness. But suddenly I felt a pleasant warmth in my body. And then I heard someone pleading. I should finally wake up. Someone was crying. But I did not recognize the voice. Yes, and then everything was black." She held her head.  
"What happened, Molly?"

She sighed.  
"You were dead. You were in cardiac arrest. The doctors spent forty minutes trying to revive you. They were about to pronounce you dead when suddenly they heard another heartbeat. They think it is a miracle that you are still alive. You were put into an artificial coma after the operation and should wake up on your own after a day or two. But you did not. You were in a coma for a week - until today"

Tears rose in her eyes again. Katie squeezed her forearm comfortingly. Molly looked up and smiled at her. They were interrupted when they suddenly heard excited voices outside the door.

Sherlock was still standing outside the door when he suddenly saw two excited characters coming towards him.   
"Sherlock, what happened? Is she awake? Have you been with her yet?" asked John excitedly.

Sherlock shook his head. He was about to say something back when the door swung open and Molly stepped out.

"She is still very weak but you can go to her. She'll be happy to see you," she said, but kept her eyes on Sherlock.

John and Mary nodded and pushed past her at the same time.

Katie looked up and smiled when she saw them.

"Hello John. Hello, Mary."

"Oh, my God, Katie. How are you?" John was still very excited.  
He took another chair and put it next to the one Molly had just sat on.  
Then they both sat down. Sherlock was still at the door, not knowing what to do.

"Well, I feel as well as can be expected. After all, I'd just been dead for twenty minutes."

John and Mary looked at her in horror. 

"Like you were dead for twenty minutes?" both asked at the same time.

"What happened?" now asked Mary.

Katie gave a deep sigh and then told them what Molly had just told her.  
They looked at her with eyes wide open before slowly moving towards her and gently hugging her.

"We are so glad you are alive. You know, after hearing from the doctors this morning that they want to turn off the machines..." His voice failed and he straightened up again.

Katie smiled compassionately at him and gently touched his forearm, as she had done to Molly a few minutes earlier. With her other hand she lightly squeezed Mary's hand.

"I am so grateful to both of you, in fact to all of you. I thank you for your help and for being there for me"

"Where's Sherlock?" she asked afterwards.  
She knew that it was he who had saved her. She wanted to see him.

Mary and John looked at each other knowingly.  
"He's outside. Shall I bring him in?" asked John and stood up slowly.

She nodded. But before John could go to the door and get the said detective, the doctor rushed in and asked her to leave politely. She needed to rest for now. But you can visit her again tomorrow. Katie insisted on seeing another visitor. She looked at John and Mary, begging them to stop him, and then turned to the doctor. After a brief discussion, the doctor finally agreed. She could see him after the examinations were over. 

John and Mary were just leaving their room when they saw Sherlock standing a few metres away.

"She wants to talk to you. But she has to go to some tests first. She asks you to wait. Will you do it?" John asked him.

Sherlock didn't know what to say until suddenly his phone vibrated in his pocket. He took it out and then looked apologetically at John.

"Lestrade. He is expecting me. I have to go!" he replied and walked past them.

He didn't know what to say at the moment and was visibly relieved at the news from Lestrade. 

John let his head hang and looked after his friend. There was confusion on his face and a slight hint of anger in his eyes. He sighed. Mary put one hand on his shoulder and looked at him cheerfully.

"We should tell her he had to go. Not that she would wait for him forever" she said afterwards. She didn't say anything about Katie actually having waited for him for ages.

John nodded. They both didn't have to wait long for Katie to be led out of their room.

"What are you still doing here?" she asked and looked around.

"Ah, he's not here anymore, is he?" She looked into two compassionate faces and understood.

"He's sorry but Lestrade had called him in," John said apologetically.

"Oh, don't be silly, John! We all know that Sherlock Holmes never apologises. But it's OK. Thanks for trying," she replied slightly disappointed and was then taken away by the nurse.

After countless examinations later she was back in her bed. She was exhausted and a hint of sadness came over her. She was disappointed that Sherlock did not want to see her. She actually thought she meant something to him. After all, he had once said that they were friends.   
Then she thought again about what Molly had told her before.

_She woke up in a place that seemed all too familiar to her. In front of her was a clearing with meadows of lush green and covered with flowers. Not far away, a forest. She remembered that she had been here very often as a child. A pleasant warmth enveloped her body. It was quiet and peaceful._   
_She moved slowly and with careful steps over the meadows. No one but she was here. She was alone._   
_Suddenly a complete darkness took over the place. She could no longer move. Her body felt numb. She wanted to scream. She wanted to run away but nothing worked. Again and again she heard voices from a distance. She wanted to answer but no sound could escape her lips._   
_She was getting weaker. Her strength was waning. Before her eyes she suddenly recognised Holden and Peter standing before her, grinning at her. Then everything was black._


	35. surprising news

Sherlock wandered up and down Baker Street in his living room. Hands crossed behind his back.   
It had now been three days since he had escaped from the hospital and literally left her hanging.  
John had not, as he suspected, spoken to him about it or made any accusations. Sherlock wondered a little but was relieved. He hoped he would let it rest on that. Especially as John was now on his way to see him in Baker Street.  
Sherlock had received a new request on the homepage and wanted him to help him. He missed the old days and the joint investigation of crimes. But the last weeks were filled with wedding preparations. The cases came up short and he slowly felt a growing hole in him and the urge to get high increased more and more. So he had to quickly deal with some mysteries to relieve the urge. And how better to do that than with his best friend and blogger.

He was now standing at the window and looking down as he heard slowly dull, heavy footsteps on the stairs. A little later John stepped inside.

"So what's so important?" he asked.

Sherlock turned around and walked over to the desk.

"I have a new case and I need your help on it," he said, holding the laptop out to him.

John briefly skimmed over it. It was mainly about blackmail and one missing person. It seemed interesting and John was looking forward to seeing something other than some napkin techniques or other things for his wedding.  
So he agreed. Of course, he could also feel something of what had been going on with Sherlock over the last few days. He knew that Sherlock had actually expected to confront him the very next day, but John decided against it and wanted to wait and see. But since he had found out from Katie that Sherlock was still not there, he didn't want to wait any longer.  
He would wait until after the fall. Sherlock is always very relaxed and sociable afterwards. Maybe he would experience something like that.

It was early evening when the two of them returned to Baker Street together. As it turned out, the blackmailer himself was behind the disappearance. It was not long before Sherlock had solved the mystery. However, contrary to suspicion, he was quite annoyed.

"What a waste of time! It sounded so promising," he grumbled as he dropped onto his chair.

John also sat down in the opposite armchair.  
"Well, at least I got away from all this wedding stuff for once," he replied, grinning.  
"Oh yes, your wedding. How is Mary? Is she stressed about it yet?"

He didn't really know how to respond to that and hoped John wouldn't notice the ironic undertone.  
"Mary's relatively well. No stress. Well, yes, actually. She's only just started making the final arrangements again. There's been a lot of stuff going on lately after what happened to Katie."

"Oh, yes, Katie. Is she still in hospital? How is she doing?" he asked slightly indifferently.

John rolled his eyes and sighed in his reaction.  
"She is doing quite well so far. She's still a bit weak but she's allowed to get up and walk short distances now. She thinks she's bored and is all the more pleased to have visitors".

If that wasn't even a clear hint,' both he and Sherlock thought.

Sherlock replied nothing and just nodded instead.

John was a little annoyed at his reaction but didn't want to let on that he was doing it.

"She would be happy to see you too. Did you know she looked rather disappointed and sad when you were gone. I excused you but she saw through it immediately. What was so important that Greg couldn't wait," he looked at him with a penetrating look.

"Oh, you know Lestrade and Scotland Yard. They can't get anything done," he waved.

Of course it was a lie. Greg had called him to his room but there was no hurry. He could have waited until the next day. But he did not want to tell him that.

"Sherlock, you're lying!" it now burst out of him.  
He knew he was lying because the next day he had met Greg in hospital and he told him about the affair. 

Sherlock was now sitting there with a rather stunned expression on his face, his mouth slightly open.

"So what really happened? Why did you run?" he continued.  
John knew there was something else and he wasn't about to give up.

There was a short break. Silence lay in the air. John continued to pierce his vis-à-vis with his gaze until the vis-à-vis could not stand it any longer.

"Oh, damn it, John!" he shouted. "What do you want me to say? Yes it's true. I was looking for an excuse to disappear! But you weren't there."   
Sherlock looked away. Then he went on.

"I was there. "That day. I was standing at her bedside, revealing my feelings, and then suddenly she was dead!"  
John looked at him in shock.  
"You did what?!"

"Weren't you listening to me?" Sherlock was annoyed.  
"I told her I loved her and then she died in my arms!"

John swallowed.  
"OK, and does she know? I mean, does she know that it was you?"

He rolled his eyes.  
"I don't think so. I heard her say to molly that she thought it was her boyfriend, that detective."

"Oh, man, Sherlock. "Once you show your emotions, someone dies. So what are you going to do now?"

"I don't know, John. She's with that Detective Reid. I think I'm going to give her space and stay away from her. I may have lost her but at least she's alive.   
I told you romantic entanglements weren't for me!"

"You should still tell her. You have nothing to lose and besides, Mary said she didn't love him. So get your ass up and go to her," he said demandingly and pulled him up.

He pushed him resolutely to the door and didn't tolerate any backtalk.

Sherlock didn't reply any more when he saw the look on his friend's face. He wouldn't give up anyway and he was right about one thing. He had nothing more to lose.

Down the street he waved a taxi over, then said goodbye to John and got in.  
This time the journey took an eternity as it was rush hour and everyone wanted to get home as quickly as possible.  
He arrived at his destination after a good 35 minutes. 

Slowly he moved towards the entrance and onto the station where he would find them. He had previously heard from John that she had left the intensive care unit and would now lie in the normal ward.

With nervous steps he slowly approached her room. As he stood in front of it, he noticed that the door was slightly open. From inside he could hear voices. She had apparently just had a visitor and the way it sounded, it was this detective.

"So David. What did you want to talk to me about?" Katie asked.

"Katie. I know we haven't known each other for very long but the last events, they were just terrible for me. I was so worried about you and I was afraid of losing you. And when I heard that you almost died, I knew I couldn't and wouldn't want to spend another day without you. I love you, Katie.  
I know this place isn't exactly appropriate for this but I'm asking you to marry me.

Sherlock's heart stopped when he heard his proposal. He moved a little closer to hear what her answer was. It was silent. She said nothing. For a moment, he was relieved. But when he heard what she said, his heart sank deep into his chest.  
He turned on his heel and walked out with a quick step. On the pavement, he waved a taxi over to him. Thank God he did not have to wait long. He gave the driver the address and let himself fall onto the seat. He just wanted to get away from here as quickly as possible.


	36. The one with the wedding dress

Katie was just sitting with Molly and Mary on a comfortable couch with a glass of champagne in her hand, waiting for Mary to present her wedding dress. It was now almost a week until the wedding and today was the last fitting of her wedding dress.

Katie had been discharged from hospital five days ago and had been home ever since. She was happy to finally be able to move outside her own four walls again. David was very careful and made sure she could stay home for the first few days. He probably had a bad conscience that he couldn't visit her so often. Katie thought it was sweet of him to take care of her but at some point the blanket fell on her head. Even her roof terrace, which she had decorated with lots of plants and an inviting sitting area, could not inspire her to spend her time at home.  
When Mary invited her to go to the bridal shop with her and Molly, she was visibly relieved and happy. David was not so enthusiastic but he always lost out with her in discussions anyway. 

Now the three women were sitting here, drinking champagne and waiting for the employee with Mary's dress.

"And Mary, is everything ready for your wedding now?" Katie asked curiously.

"Yes. Everything is planned so far. At last!" she exclaimed with relief. "The church is organised. The function room is booked. The seating arrangements have also been arranged. And all important matters have been settled. I have to say, Sherlock was a great help. He's also going to compose the music for our wedding dance, by the way."

"So, Sherlock helped you with that? I wouldn't have thought so." she asked astonished. "How is he doing with it?" 

"Oh, he'll be fine. Nothing will change. John and he will still be able to solve crimes. By the way, John said he heard you sing in the lab a while back. Said you had a stunning voice. Would you sing something at our wedding?"

Oh no, not this again,' thought Katie, twisting her eyes inside.

"Oh, Mary. I'd rather not. I've already told John that I can't do that either,' she said somewhat embarrassed.

Now Molly hooked herself in.  
"I think you should do it. You really have a great voice. I heard you sometimes when you were in your office and I'd walk in the door." she grinned.

"Oh, I don't know about that. I'll think about it. Okay? But let's talk about something now"

"Okay,okay. How do you feel about being a newlywed fiancée now?" asked Mary. 

Mary was not really taken with the news of her engagement. But of course she did not show it. She kept hoping that Sherlock and Katie would finally admit their feelings for each other.

Great change of subject' thought Katie as she rolled her eyes.  
"I don't know. It's strange but I think David is the right man for me. After the last few weeks I've been thinking a lot and I think it's the right decision.

"Okay. But do you love him? I mean, have you told him yet?" she continued to probe.

Katie was surprised by her question and did not know what to answer. She hadn't told him yet and she wasn't really aware of her feelings. She liked David, she really liked him a lot. She also enjoyed every free minute with him and obviously had fun. She missed him when he was not with her. But was that really love? She couldn't find the answer to that. The last time she thought she was in love was with Sherlock. Around him, she always felt like she had arrived. She always felt such a wonderful warmth and tingling when he smiled at her or when they hugged.  
She missed these physical stimuli when she was with David. She often dismissed it by saying that they had only known each other for a few months and that they needed to get to know each other even more intensively.  
His request came as a surprise and her answer to it also surprised her.

_Katie was just lying in her hospital bed. She was strangely sad and disappointed. She was happy that her friends always came to visit her, but she was missing one particular person. Sherlock had not even visited her in those days, although she said she wanted to talk to him. John had apologised for him but Katie was sure that he didn't want to see her and didn't care about her. She just wasn't important enough._   
_She stared thoughtfully out the window. A tear had come loose and was now slowly running down her cheek. Suddenly there was a knock at the door and David stepped in. He immediately seemed to notice that something was wrong with her and finally took her in his arms. Katie didn't know why but she was crying against her boyfriend's shoulders for another. When she had calmed down, he loosened up, pulled up a chair and took her hand in his. He looked deep into her eyes and then told her that he had recently seen how important she was to him and that he didn't want to lose her. And then he asked her to marry him. Katie did not know what to say at first. A somewhat uncomfortable silence returned. It was much too early but recent events had shown her that life could be over much too quickly and she would have to take every chance. David was just about to say something - apparently he had noticed her expression - when it finally burst out of her. He beamed and pulled her into a tight embrace. As she walked her eyes towards the door, she could see a shadow, which then disappeared quickly._

Mary pulled it out of her thoughts as she waved a hand in front of her face.  
"Hello? Earth to Katie. I asked you a question?"

But before Katie could answer, the employee came and took Mary into the cabin. Katie was relieved. After all, she didn't know what to say.

Molly looked at her a little sceptically from the side. She was about to say something when the cabin was opened and a radiant Mary came out. Her dress was exactly her style. It wasn't a typical wedding dress in white but it fitted her perfectly.  
The two women turned to her and smiled at her.

"You look lovely" said Molly and Katie at the same time. Then they looked at each other and both had to laugh. The staff member tugged the dress a little bit again and again, and took some marks here and there.

"Hey, what do you think about just looking around a bit during that time? It will take a little longer here. And maybe you'll find something suitable for Katie," Mary asked curiously and grinned.

Katie, who had just taken a sip, choked on her question and then looked at her in astonishment. Molly next to her beamed at the idea.

"Mary, I've been engaged for less than two weeks and I've been out of the hospital for five days. I don't think that's really top priority yet. I don't even have a dress for your wedding yet."

"Oh, come on! Then at least for fun and ideas you can collect" she sulked slightly.

"What's wrong with you?" Now Katie turned to Molly. "Your wedding is closer. Don't you want to take a look around too?"

"I'm all set. I'm gonna wear my mother's wedding dress. But thanks for asking."

"Well, what do you think?" asked Mary.

Katie sighed.  
"Is there any chance of getting out of this?"

Molly and Mary both looked at each other, then back at Katie.  
"NO!" both at the same time and grinning.

Reluctantly, she picked out a dress. She decided on a mermaid-style dress. The top was tight-fitting and decorated with lace elements. The back was partially exposed. At the bottom there was a small train. It was a flowing fabric and felt incredibly supple in her hands.

Mary had changed her clothes again and was now waiting for Katie with Molly.  
After only a few minutes she stepped out and stood in front of the two of them, facing the mirror. The employee followed her and threw another veil over her so that the outfit seemed to be complete.

"Well, what do you think?" she then asked.  
But before the two of them could reply, a voice suddenly came up behind them.

"Beautiful"

Curious, all three turned to the voice. About a metre away from them stood Sherlock and now looked around somewhat embarrassed. There was a somewhat uncomfortable silence. Their eyes were still fixed on the man. Sherlock was used to the looks of other people, but this time he felt a little uncomfortable.

"Sherlock, what are you doing here?" Mary asked and broke the silence.  
She didn't wait for his answer, but then turned to Katie.  
"But Sherlock is right. You look really beautiful. David's eyes would fall out if he saw you walking down the aisle like that!"   
"Do you really think so?" Katie asked Katie, slightly insecure.   
"She's right. Your fiancé is very lucky" came Sherlock again.

Katie looked somewhat embarrassed in the man's direction. Her cheeks turned red. Molly and Mary, however, looked at each other knowingly and smiled. 

"Thanks" was all she could get out of it. Then she turned around and quickly stepped back into the cabin. 

Sherlock continued to look at her. He was breathless. The feeling of jealousy and disappointment overtook him. 

'Too bad she couldn't wear it for me,' he thought. 

Finally he was torn from his thoughts when Mary spoke to him.  
"So, Sherlock, what are you doing here?" 

"Er, er. I...I don't know... he stammered. What was going on with him? He was usually so eloquent. Then he shook his head and tried again.

"John wanted to tell you something. Something about the wedding but he couldn't reach you. And he couldn't come here either, could he?" 

Mary looked startled at her phone, which was silent. She could see that there were five missed calls and several messages from her fiancé. She apologised to them, lifted her phone to her ear and walked out of the room.

Sherlock was still looking in the direction Katie disappeared a few minutes earlier. He hardly noticed that Molly was saying anything. He seemed to be in a trance.

"Oh, dear, I hope it's not serious."

Sherlock didn't take his eyes off him.  
"Hmm? Oh, no, everything's going to be fine," he waved. 

"Goodbye, Molly!" he then said, turning around and then leaving the shop.


	37. I love you

It was late afternoon when Katie returned home. Mary had said goodbye to them both. There was still something to be sorted out about the catering, she said. Molly and Katie decided to use the day to look for an outfit for the wedding. Katie quickly found what she was looking for and decided on a long dress in petrol and matching shoes. Afterwards she also said goodbye. David would stop by later and she wanted to freshen up.

There were now about two hours left until he arrived. They had planned to have dinner together tonight and a movie night. So she decided to take a long shower and then make herself comfortable on her roof terrace with a coffee and her book. So she made herself comfortable in her sitting area and looked out over the roofs of London. She recalled the day and thought about how she had felt in a wedding dress. She obviously enjoyed it and was looking forward to being a bride. Perhaps she would wear this dress too. Then she remembered that Sherlock had described her as beautiful and thought her boyfriend might be happy he had her. Katie was embarrassed by his statement and she also thought she could read a hint of disappointment in his eyes.

She was torn from her thoughts when she suddenly heard it ringing downstairs. Determined, she went downstairs and opened the door. She expected David to be there an hour early, but when she saw the person standing in front of her, her breath faltered. 

"What are you doing here, Sherlock?" she asked confusedly.

"Um, I...I remembered that you wanted to talk to me?" he replied to her in an uncertain tone.

Katie looked at him with a confused look. It takes her a while to realize

"Sherlock, that was a fortnight ago! I thought, after I hadn't seen you again then, that it was done"

"I had a lot to do. With cases and wedding stuff for John and Mary," he said apologetically.

"All right" she sighed. "Come on" she said and stepped aside a little to make room for him.

Sherlock accepted her offer with thanks and stepped in. He had still been here and didn't know where to go. He waited for her to go ahead and show him the way.

"This really has to stop. You can't keep standing outside my door and scaring me like this. But you can't stay here this time" she joked and led him down the hall to the living room. 

She indicated to him to sit down.

"Would you like something to drink?"

Sherlock denied and Katie then sat down in one of the armchairs opposite him. 

Again there was a somewhat uncomfortable silence in the room. Neither of them knew what to say.  
"Nice place you've got here" he finally said and looked around the room.

"Sherlock, you don't have to do this. I know you're not the type for small talk," she explained and then went on.  
"So, before things get any more unpleasant. I really just wanted to say thank you back then. I know that it was you who saved me and that you accompanied me to the hospital in the ambulance. And I also know that you feel guilty because you rejected me back then. But you don't have to feel guilty. You were right. I have someone at my side whom I could ask for help. So it's okay."  
Sherlock looked at her with surprise. He was amazed at how well she would always know him.

"OK, so if we've got that sorted..."

He was just about to get up and leave when she spoke again.

"But I have one question for you. If you already saved me, stepped over your emotional boundaries when you were with me in the ambulance, why... why did you avoid me from then on? I thought we were friends. Remember? You said that about us once..." She didn't look at him. Instead, she nested on her fingers, her eyes looking down.

Sherlock was still half standing. He didn't know whether to sit down again or stand still. Finally he sat down again so he wouldn't have to look down at her. 

"I thought maybe you were too busy. "and Mary and John and Molly and her boyfriend were visiting you, I didn't want to disturb you too." He accidentally pronounced the word friend in a slightly disgusted tone, hoping she hadn't noticed.  
But of course she had noticed.

"Do you have anything against David?" she asked slightly angry.

"I don't know him. He seems competent in his work and you seem happy with him but..." He faltered. 

"But?" she asked with a wrinkled forehead.

Sherlock sighed and drove himself through his curls.  
Should he really tell her? But like John said, he had nothing more to lose.

"I don't think he's the right man for you," he almost whispered.

Katie was shocked. What did he say? 

"Like... but... what...? What makes you say something like that?!" she asked slightly annoyed.

"Do you love him?" he asked instead, his eyes lowered.

"What is this stupid question! We're going to get married" she replied angrily to him.

"Yes, but do you love him?" he asked again, looking her in the eyes.

She didn't want to face it now. Especially not to Sherlock. He could easily take her answer apart and deduce something that she might not want to hear.

"I don't have to justify myself to you here now! I think it's better if you leave now," she suggested and stood up.

Sherlock did not move.  
"No, I'm not leaving! You know, I saw her there. I was there and you died in MY arms! And I can see that you don't love him. You must not marry him!" he replied loudly.

Startled, she turned to him and looked at him stunned in the face.   
"Go away! Please" she begged. Tears ran down her face.

Reluctantly he stood up and slowly moved down the corridor to her door. In the middle he turned around once more.  
"He does not love you as I do!" 

Katie looked at him with tears streaming down her face. Then, when she heard the flat door close, she crashed to the floor, sobbing.  
How dare he do that? How could he question her feelings about David? And how could he now tell her what she had been waiting for so long?  
He had finally told her the words she had longed for so long. Only his timing was extremely bad. And what did he think, she had died in his arms. She wasn't dead when he found her. But that must mean that....

Katie was interrupted by the doorbell. She rose quickly, ran to the mirror, wiped the tears from her face and finally opened the door.   
She would try not to think about it today and would try to enjoy the evening with her fiancé.

Of course it did not stop there.


	38. The wedding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, now it goes on and I can already say that it won't be long and the story is over :) I hope you enjoyed the story so far?
> 
> So here they are. The last two chapters of my story "Everything" ;)

Today was the big day. The wedding of John and Mary.  
Katie took another quick look in the mirror. The long dress flattered her curves. She wore her hair partly open with slight waves. Some were tucked back so that a few strands framed her face. She decided that she looked good and she felt that way.

After the last few days she was happy to see some familiar and friendly faces again. After her evening with David and after Sherlock had confessed his love for her, she had hardly left her flat. She ignored all phone calls, answered only so that her friends would have a sign of life from her and retreated. She was still on sick leave so she didn't have to go to work and maybe meet a certain consulting detective. She spent most of the first few days in bed. Since the weather was not very good during this time either, she didn't have a bad conscience.  
On the third day the morning sun woke her up and Katie decided to change her bed for the sitting area on her roof terrace.   
Day number 5 (the day before the wedding) brought some uninvited visitors. Molly was worried and stood outside her door and rang the storm bell when she didn't open.  
Katie finally opened reluctantly and Molly stared at her in shock. She didn't wait to be invited in, but pushed past her and went into the kitchen to prepare tea. She then dragged her to a beauty salon and hairdresser. Katie objected vehemently but Molly was stronger. 

_They were just sitting having a manicure and talking about the wedding. Molly noticed that something was wrong with her. Eventually, Katie couldn't stand it any longer and it burst out of her._

_"Sherlock had told me he loved me!"_  
_Molly turned to her friend in surprise._  
_"He did what? And what did you say or do?"_

_"I've thrown him out of my flat!" she sighed._  
_"Wait, he said he loved you and you threw him out? What happened?"_

_So she told her about the evening, about what Sherlock had accused her of and then finally told her how he felt about her._

_Molly took a deep breath and stared at her with eyes wide open._

_"So what are you going to do now? I mean, do you love David or Sherlock?"_

_"Molly, I don't know. I like David a lot but I don't know if I can love him," she sobbed._

_Molly wanted to comfort her and put an arm around her but her hands and nails were just polished and made pretty. She looked at her with compassion._  
_"Katie. I know you don't like to hear this. But I think Sherlock's right. You don't love David and you can't marry him. You love Sherlock!"_

_"I know. I think you're right, but what am I going to do? I mean, he'll never want to see me again after I've thrown him out?!"_  
_"I don't think he's like that. John told me he'd seen him the other day and he seemed sad. He was playing that sad tune on his violin again. I think you should just go and tell him."_

Molly was right. She had to tell him. And she had to talk to David. She just can't marry him. She loves Sherlock and she was hoping he would still do the same.

"Okay. I'll talk to him about it tomorrow. Maybe he won't make such a scene with all these people standing around."

Molly looked at her sceptically.  
"Are you sure about this? After all, this is Sherlock we're talking about!" She had to smile.

Now Katie was smiling, too. 

Looking back, she had enjoyed yesterday very much and had been happy to talk to someone about it. She was so grateful that Molly was her friend.

She was now waiting on the pavement outside her house for David to drive to church with her. It didn't take long and a taxi stopped in front of her. David got out, gave her a quick kiss and then helped her get in.  
The drive to the church didn't take long, and a little later they were already sitting on one of the pews, waiting for it to start. Katie and David sat in the row next to Molly, Tom and Mrs Hudson and her lover. Molly nodded inconspicuously in the direction where John and Sherlock were standing. She lightly squeezed Katie's hand and smiled encouragingly at her. As Katie also looked ahead, their eyes met. Sherlock looked at her only briefly before turning away from her. Disappointment was building up inside her. 

A short time later the music started and a radiant bride walked along the path to the altar.

***

The ceremony was dreamlike. Katie could see that some people had to suppress a few tears of emotion. She focused on the couple just saying their vows but she only had eyes for one other person in front. He did not look in her direction. His eyes were fixed on the couple in front of him.

After the ceremony was finished, the bride and groom left the church. Some more pictures were taken with the couple, the relatives and bridesmaids and best man. Katie could see that Janine, one of the bridesmaids, was talking to Sherlock and giggling.  
She knew Janine from the stag party and knew how she looked to men. A hint of jealousy spread through her. Defiantly, she sought out her fiancé and wrapped her arms around him. Then she gave him a passionate kiss. But it wasn't the same tingling sensation as with Sherlock, she thought by the way.  
When enough pictures were taken, they finally went to the event building where the actual celebration was to take place.  
It was a beautiful backdrop. A big, long, flat building with big windows and a huge, inviting park in front of it. In the middle was a fountain.

They stood in line to congratulate the bridal couple. David was in front of it and was the first to offer his congratulations. Towards Sherlock he behaved reservedly but politely. Katie gave them a big hug and congratulated them too. Then she turned away. Her gaze wandered on to the best man. She felt excitement and a certain pulling inside her.

"Hello Sherlock" she said calmly and nodded to him.

"Katie" replied unemotionally.

She continued to walk past him and felt a piece break in her as he reacted. Then she sat down at her table and took a big sip of the wine she had just received from one of the waiters.  
Either Sherlock was angry or he had forgotten her now. She didn't know it but both possibilities depressed her. She absolutely had to talk to him.

It took quite a long time until she had the chance to do so for the first time. By now it was evening and the afternoon had been quite exciting. It wasn't just the usual best man speech and cake cutting. Instead, another crime was solved and of course it was Sherlock who found the culprit.

Katie was just coming down the aisle when he saw Sherlock standing in an anteroom. She plucked up all her courage and slowly walked towards him. 

"Sherlock? Can I talk to you for a moment?" she asked timidly.

He turned around, froze briefly at the sight of her and then replied to her.  
"Not now. I have to practise my dance with the bridesmaid.

Katie was just about to say something back when Janine suddenly came in and joined Sherlock.

"Oh hello Katie" she said happily. "Mary had told me what happened to you after the stag party. Are you all right?" she asked compassionately.

Katie was still standing there, mouth half open, looking at the man next to her.  
"Uh, what? Oh, yes, I'm better now. Thanks."   
She put on a fake smile and then walked away disappointed. Sherlock glanced at her for a moment before Janine interrupted him.

"Well, shall we?" Put one hand on his shoulder and smiled at him. 

Katie turned it around for a second and then whispered softly.  
"You were right."

Sherlock froze briefly when he heard what she said, but then turned to his dancing partner.

Molly, who had seen that Katie was with Sherlock, was just coming towards her.  
"Well, did you talk to him? What did he say?"

"Molly, I don't think there's any point. He wouldn't talk to me, instead he's dancing with that Janine woman. I think I'm just gonna let it go. It's just not meant to be."

"You're not gonna do this!" Both turned to the two women who had just come through the door.  
It was Mrs Hudson and Mary. Katie looked at them both in wonder and horror.

"You're not going to give up now, you hear me? He loves you and you love him. It's taken you two a long time to realise that. Now go and get him," Mary said confidently.

Mrs Hudson just stood there nodding encouragingly and smiling.

Katie said nothing, turning instead and running in the direction she had come from before. A quick glance showed her that Sherlock was in conversation with Lestrade, John and this photographer. So he had stopped him.  
She decided not to disturb him for the time being and to wait outside. She needed fresh air anyway.  
She lost herself in the stars when a clear throat brought her back to reality.

"So. You wanted to talk to me?"  
Sherlock was standing behind her. She could feel his radiant warmth. Slowly, she turned to him. Despite her heels, she was still one head shorter and had to look up.   
She was about to say something when David interrupted her. When he found her, he glanced at Sherlock and looked at him with a questioning look. 

"Katie there you are. Come on, they want to do the wedding dance now," he said and pulled her with him. Sherlock looked at her and she looked at him apologetically.

Their wedding dance was very soulful. There was love in the air. Sherlock had composed a song for them and played it on his violin. His eyes were on the dancing couple. Katie felt a couple of arms around them, gently swaying to the beat. Her eyes, however, remained fixed on the man playing the violin, then on the couple again and then on the man on stage again.  
Suddenly she realised that she could no longer do this. She pulled David out of the hall with her, who looked at her slightly confused.

"Katie, what's wrong?" he then asked as she stood before him.

"David. I'm so sorry but I just can't do this. I cannot marry you. I just don't feel for you the way you feel for me," she said slightly nervously, holding the engagement ring out to him. 

"It's because of HIM, isn't it? You love HIM?" he asked in a calm tone.

Katie had expected him to get angry and shout at her but he was calm and almost understanding.  
He must have noticed her look as he continued speaking.

"I've seen it for a long time. And I also see the way he always looks at you. And when I noticed how worried he was about you when you were taken, I knew. I'm not angry. And frankly, I'm kind of relieved. It was just too soon. We haven't even really gotten to know each other yet. Katie, I like you and I want you to be happy and if you can only be with him, then so be it"

Katie knew nothing to say. She just stared at him. Then she pulled him into a hug and thanked him for everything.

She turned around again and went back into the hall. In the meantime the dance music had started and people were romping around on the dance floor. She walked through the crowd looking for Sherlock. He was nowhere to be seen. She went on to Molly, who was now dancing wildly with her fiancé. Molly looked at her sympathetically and said she had seen him leave the hall. David came to them and whispered something in her ear. She turned around in horror and asked him to stop him.

Then she walked towards the stage. She climbed the stairs, approached the DJ, spoke briefly with him and handed him a CD. Then she stood at the microphone. When the music stopped, all eyes were now on her.

"Hello! My name is Katie and I know that Mrs and Dr Watson (pointed in her direction) wanted me to sing at their wedding. So you two, this is my wedding gift to you" she said.

She stood very close to the microphone and held it in both hands. Then she gave the DJ a short signal and started singing.  
As she sang, her thoughts hung on Sherlock the whole time. She was just hoping that David could somehow stop him. 


	39. You're everything

Sherlock stood at the cloakroom waiting for his coat. He did not want to and could not stay there any longer. Couples in love were everywhere and love was in the air. His dancing partner was also busy and Katie was with her fiancé. He couldn't stand it any longer and simply had to get out. He was just going out the door when this Detective Reid appeared in front of him and tried to engage him in conversation. But Sherlock was not in the mood for small talk and was about to turn away from him when he suddenly heard her voice from inside.  
He paused and then slowly went back.   
He didn't go back into the room, but stood a little to the side. And there she stood.

Katie was on stage, her hands on the microphone stand, her eyes closed and singing. She had a beautiful voice and the song was very soulful and fitting for today. A glance into the room revealed that everyone around seemed to have lost themselves in the song and listened to her excitedly. So was Sherlock. He looked at her constantly and when the chorus started, she opened her eyes and her eyes met. His heart stopped briefly when he saw her and heard what she was singing. 

_Cause you're all I want, you're all I need_   
_You're everything, everything_

Then Katie took the microphone in her hand and reinforced her singing. At the end of the song she put all her feelings into it once more. A lonely tear ran down. Then it fell silent.  
There was a brief silence in the hall before everyone cheered and applauded with enthusiasm.

Sherlock had left the building just before the end of the song and after a while stood in front of the fountain, in the middle of the small park. He thought about what she had sung and secretly there was hope that it was meant for him after all. Then he thought about before. She wanted to talk to him. What do you think she wanted to tell him?

He was torn out of his thoughts when a voice that he trusted interrupted him.

"Sherlock? I thought you'd gone."

Katie slowly approached him. Sherlock didn't turn around, just turned his head slightly to one side.

"Well obviously I'm not," he said then.   
"And what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with the other guests, celebrating?" His voice sounded cold and hurt.

"I've been looking for you" she almost whispered.

"Well, obviously you found me," he replied to her without emotion and turned to her now.

What was wrong with him? Why was he so cold to her? Tears slowly came to her eyes.

"Why are you like that?" she asked horrified, small tears now slowly rolled down her cheeks.

"What am I like?"

"You are somehow so indifferent and cold"

"Well, that's just the way I am. Accept it or leave!"   
He didn't know why he was so cold to her himself. Actually he wanted to take her in his arms and hold her and never let go. But he also knew that he could not do this. She was engaged and loved someone else.

Katie stood there frozen, disappointment in her eyes.  
"NO! You are not like that! You've shown me often enough that you're not like that!"

Now she came closer.  
"And I know that somewhere inside there's a heart and behind it a person with feelings," she cried, pointing her finger at the place where his heart is.

"You might believe that. So what are you doing here besides looking for me? Aren't you supposed to be with your fiancé?" and then grabbed her hand, which was still pressing on his chest.

Katie drew a desperate breath.  
"Actually I wanted to apologise to you for kicking you out of my flat and to tell you that you were right about everything you said! But obviously you don't want to talk to me. So I'm going to leave" she said, pulling her hand away and turning away from him. 

After a few metres she turned to him again.  
"Oh, and by the way, David is not my fiance anymore!"

He just stood there, not really understanding what she had just said.  
"No! Stop! Wait!" he almost yelled to stop her from leaving. When he noticed that she stopped, he slowly moved towards her.  
"I obviously hurt you and I'm sorry!"

Had he just apologised to her then? Slowly she turned to him again, only to find that he had already moved closer to her again.

"So what happened? Why is he no longer her fiance? Have they married in the meantime?" he then asked.

Katie struck her forehead with her hand inside.   
How can you be so clever and so stupid at the same time?' she asked herself.

"He's not my fiance any more because I ended it tonight, Sherlock. I can't marry him because I love someone else! Did you not understand the meaning of the song?   
You know, for a genius, you can be pretty stupid sometimes," she replied, grinning slightly.

Sherlock took her grin away and then smiled slightly. But wait, had she just said she loved someone else?

"Forgive my 'stupidity' but this is not my area. I understand perfectly but I don't see what this has to do with her engagement?"

She moved closer to him and turned her gaze to his.  
"Sherlock, I didn't sing it for David or John and Mary. I sang it for YOU, and I meant every word."

He looked down at her in confusion and took a moment to realise what she had just said.

"You… You...mean...?"

Katie took a deep breath in, then breathed out again.  
"Yes, Sherlock. I love you. I think I always have, just too stubborn to realise it!" she interrupted him.

Sherlock replied nothing. He just stood there, staring lost into the void. When he still said nothing after a minute, she finally turned away from him, disappointed.

"I'm beginning to think it wasn't a good idea. I assumed you would feel the same way after you said it that night and in the hospital," she said a little sadly.

She didn't get far, though, when Sherlock finally grabbed her by the arm and turned her towards him. He moved closer to her and looked into her eyes. He smiled at her. Then he took her face in his hands and slowly approached hers with his lips. Just before he stopped again, smiled again and then kissed her. He was hesitant at first and took it gently. Katie sighed comfortably and then let her hands wander from his back to his neck. She pulled him closer and then buried her fingers in his curls. He took his hands away from her face, never letting go of her, then put them around her waist to pull her even closer. The kiss intensified. He ran his tongue over her lower lip. She opened her lips willingly and willingly and her tongues carefully explored each other's. They both felt as if they were literally merging into each other.   
Both finally had to separate again when the air ran out. He did not move away from her, however, but put his forehead against hers.

"I love you too" he whispered so softly that she could hardly hear it. 

She smiled at him, then wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest. She could hear his heart beating excitedly. Both didn't say anything, they just held close together. At some point, Katie broke the comforting silence between them.

"Sherlock?" she asked. "Why now?"

"Why now, what do you mean? Oh, I see. Well, actually, I felt it then, and when I was with you in America, it got stronger. But I couldn't understand it, I couldn't handle it. It kind of scared me. But then when I saw you standing in that wedding dress, it became clear to me. I just could not and did not want to lose you," he said calmly.

"But you know that if you'd noticed earlier we wouldn't have had all this crap here?" she asked with a grin.

"I know," he sighed. "But as you know, all these feelings and stuff are new to me.

"Well, then let me help you with that and we can explore it more closely together," she suggested and pressed a light kiss on his cheek.  
"I'd like that" he grinned at her. Then he spoke on.

"Now that that has been cleared up. I have one more question. Would you wear that dress to our wedding?"

Katie sat up and looked into two hopeful eyes.  
"What?" she asked confusedly and frowned.

"Do you think I'd ever let you go again, now that I've finally got you with me? I almost lost you once before and I don't want to lose you again and--"

"Sherlock. Stop!" she interrupted him.   
"There's nothing in the world I'd rather do but don't you think we should not rush things and see where it all goes first. This is all new territory for me too, by the way. I've never told anyone I love them because I've never felt with anyone else as I do with you," she said and nervously bit her lip.

Hopefully she hadn't ruined it now but his hint also scared the hell out of her. Yes, she loved him but she also knew he was completely new in this field and a wedding would intensify everything. She was afraid that he couldn't handle it.

"I wouldn't know what that would change in my feelings. You are everything to me. You are smart, beautiful, tough and you have as much interest in crime as I do and most importantly, I love you!"

Katie was so moved when she heard what he said. No one had ever said anything like that to her before. Tears came to her eyes again. She couldn't help but draw him back to her. She put all her feelings for him into that kiss. They were interrupted when they heard some cheering and clapping from the door.

They both turned to the building and saw Mary and John standing there. Mary cheered and yelled at them, "It's about time, you two!

Katie and Sherlock grinned at each other and deepened their kiss again.

After a while he asked, "Well, shall we go back inside?"

But Katie just grinned.  
  
"Actually," she said, entangling her fingers with his "If I knew anything better," and then dragged him along with her. 

END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: So, that's it. The story is finished and so am I. This was my last fanfiction. I hope the people who read it enjoyed the story ;) And of course I'd also appreciate some concluding comments or thoughts about it. 
> 
> Many thanks to all ;)


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